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Peace and Parenting: How to Parent without Punishments

Michelle Kenney, M. Ed
  • 4.9 (348)
  • PARENTING
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Are you sick of parenting with the ideas of yelling and shame and looking for something that feels better, is different, but still has a sense of boundaries and limits? Welcome to Peace and Parenting! Michelle is a former teacher, counselor, certified parenting coach, mom of two teens, recovering yeller, and perfectionist who parents without using punishments altogether. And guess what? It works! On this show, you’ll learn the how behind having kids who are entirely UNPUNISHED but who are also successful, kind, loving, and know how to follow directions.  Once a week, Michelle shares her insights and expertise on connective parenting through solo episodes and interviews with experts and other struggling parents. If you have exhausted all other options and don't know what to do next, this could be the parenting strategy you've been searching for.

  1. 5H AGO

    What You're Doing to Keep Them Safe Is Making Them Fragile

    The week before my oldest daughter left for college, I caught myself reorganizing her room, repacking her bags, sending her articles she didn't ask for. And I realized standing in her doorway one night, she was ready. She had been ready for a long time. I was the one who wasn't ready to let her go. What hit me hardest wasn't the goodbye. It was the recognition that for years, I had been fighting the same quiet battle inside myself: the pull to manage, the pull to control outcomes, the pull to step in just one more time so things didn't go sideways. In this episode, I'm walking you through what I now teach parents inside one-on-one coaching about raising a genuinely resilient kid. We'll cover the loving belief almost every parent holds that's quietly making their child more fragile, the brain science of "tolerable stress" and why your child's prefrontal cortex actually needs struggle to grow, the difference between abandoning and over-helping (a sweet spot I call connected courage), and the five shifts that change everything. This isn't about being a harder parent. It's about finally trusting the child you've been raising all along. Download our Empathy Guide Join us on our Weekly Training every Thursday at 9:30 am PT live on Facebook & Zoom Interested in coaching? Book a Discovery Call with me at michelle@peaceandparentingla.com Check out my book UNPUNISHED Follow Peace and Parenting: Instagram: @peaceandparenting Facebook: @peaceandparentingla YouTube: @peaceandparentingla 💌 Enjoy today’s episode? Please share it with a fellow parent or leave a rating and a review. Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    21 min

  2. MAY 19

    The Phone Problem Isn't Your Kid's, It's Yours

    For years in my own house, my ex-husband and I were both deep tech people. From the moment we woke up until we went to bed, there was some kind of screen running. Phones at the dinner table while the kids played next to us. And then I would turn around and try to set screen-time rules for my daughters, and wonder why nothing was working. The truth is, the most powerful screen-time intervention you have isn't what you do with your child's phone. It's what you do with yours. In this episode, I'm walking you through the full framework for raising screen-smart kids without the daily power struggle. You'll hear the moment with my daughters that finally made me change how I parented around tech, why scarcity-based rules ("no phone until you…") create more obsession instead of less, and the exact transition language I use so kids can put a device down without a meltdown. If you've ever felt like you're losing the screen-time battle, I want you to hear this one before you take another phone away. Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    22 min
  3. What Yelling Actually Does to Your Child (And How to Stop)

    MAY 12

    What Yelling Actually Does to Your Child (And How to Stop)

    I was a yeller. Not a "lost it once or twice" yeller, a full-on, scream-in-my-two-year-old's-face yeller. I shamed my oldest daughter. I became her first bully, without meaning to and without wanting to. And I want to share that with you not because I'm proud of it, but because I know how many parents are sitting in that same place right now, exhausted and ashamed, swearing tonight will be different and then losing it again at bedtime. In this training, I'm walking you through what I had to learn before any of it could change, including the brain science that genuinely scared me into doing the work. You'll hear what yelling actually does to your child's developing brain, why control parenting (bribes, threats, punishment) always backfires, the five daily connection pillars I built into our family rhythm, and a complete in-the-moment toolkit for the seconds before you lose it. And I'll share the one secret tool I gave my own daughters that kept me more accountable than any book or coach ever could. Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    27 min
  4. Stop Playing Referee: How to End Sibling Fights Without Picking a Winner

    MAY 5

    Stop Playing Referee: How to End Sibling Fights Without Picking a Winner

    My daughters fought constantly when they were little, and I tried everything. I separated them. I punished them. I lectured. I bribed. I yelled. Nothing worked, not really. It would stop for twenty minutes and we would be right back at it. What finally changed everything wasn't a new consequence, it was a completely new role. In this episode, I'm giving you that role. I'm walking you through the full 12-step Sibling Rivalry Protocol I teach inside the Peace and Parenting Community: the exact framework I used to stop being the judge and jury in my house and start being the coach. We'll cover why your instinct to figure out "who started it" is actually extending the fight, why comforting the child who caused the hurt is the move most parents skip, and the makeup story from my own home that took me about two hundred repetitions to get right. Stay with me on this one, the shift is bigger than it sounds. Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    28 min
  5. The 10-Minute Mom: Why Quality Beats Quantity Every Time

    APR 28

    The 10-Minute Mom: Why Quality Beats Quantity Every Time

    I have lost count of how many moms have told me they feel like they're failing because they don't have enough time. They're at work all day, running between activities, exhausted by 8pm, and convinced that if they could just carve out a few more hours, they'd finally feel like the mom they want to be. I want to challenge that belief in this episode, because it's quietly costing you the connection you already have access to right now. The truth is, you don't need more time. You need to stop wasting the windows you already have. In this training, I'm sharing the 10-Minute Mom framework I teach inside the Peace and Parenting Community: a simple structure of three daily connection windows that takes ten minutes total. I'll walk you through the research, the traps that are stealing your presence (the phone vortex, the task takeover, and fixer mode), and the exact words I use with my own daughters. Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    19 min

  6. APR 21

    Empowering Children: Why Obedience Doesn't Keep Kids Safe

    Most of us were raised to believe that an obedient child is a safe child. I believed it too, for a long time. But the truth is the opposite, and it took me years of parenting and coaching to really see it. A child who is trained to always comply, who learns that disagreement equals punishment, who can't say no at home, is not going to suddenly find their voice when a peer pressures them or an adult crosses a line. They freeze. They give away their lunch. They attract people who take advantage of exactly that. In this episode, I'll walk you through the steps to raise kids with a real internal compass, not blind obedience, and not disrespect, but something much stronger than both. If you've ever worried about whether your child can advocate for themselves when you're not in the room, this one's for you. Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    19 min

  7. APR 14

    You Can't Parent From Empty

    I’m back, and I’m coming in honest. After losing my dad last year, I stepped away from the podcast, my work, and the pressure to keep performing as a parent. In this return episode, I reflect on what three months of cocooning taught me about grief, self-preservation, and the impossible standard we hold ourselves to as parents. If you've ever pushed through a hard season while secretly falling apart, this one's for you. Whether you're navigating loss, a life transition, or just a really hard week, this episode is a reminder that your well-being isn't separate from your parenting. It is your parenting. In this episode, we cover: 👉Why you can't be a great parent when you're running on empty 👉The difference between pushing through and taking care of yourself 👉What your kids are actually learning when they watch you struggle 👉How listening partnerships help parents carry the emotional weight 👉Why prioritizing yourself isn't selfish, it's the whole point Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    13 min
  8. Why Your Child Misbehaves And What To Do

    APR 7

    Why Your Child Misbehaves And What To Do

    Your child isn't "being bad", they're trying to tell you something. In this episode, I break down the five real reasons children misbehave and why the punishments, time-outs, and consequences you've been relying on are actually making behavior worse. You'll learn my step-by-step framework for responding to any behavior with both connection and limits, plus three quick wins you can start using today. If you're stuck in the yelling-guilt-repeat cycle and nothing seems to work no matter how hard you try, this is the episode that changes everything. Want an opportunity to get your parenting questions answered by Michelle? Join us live this Thursday at 9:30 am PST 🔗 Interested in our programs or coaching? Book a free Discovery Call today. 🌟Explore and Join our Peace and Parenting Community 📖 Check out my book: UNPUNISHED Feeling called to bring this work to other parents? Our Coaching Certification Program trains you to do exactly that. DM me CERTIFICATION on Instagram for details. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

    24 min
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About

Are you sick of parenting with the ideas of yelling and shame and looking for something that feels better, is different, but still has a sense of boundaries and limits? Welcome to Peace and Parenting! Michelle is a former teacher, counselor, certified parenting coach, mom of two teens, recovering yeller, and perfectionist who parents without using punishments altogether. And guess what? It works! On this show, you’ll learn the how behind having kids who are entirely UNPUNISHED but who are also successful, kind, loving, and know how to follow directions.  Once a week, Michelle shares her insights and expertise on connective parenting through solo episodes and interviews with experts and other struggling parents. If you have exhausted all other options and don't know what to do next, this could be the parenting strategy you've been searching for.

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