The Estranged Heart

The Estranged Heart
  • 4.8 (100)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

Support and community for navigating the emotional storms of parent and adult child estrangement and repairing and transforming relationships with one another in healthy and productive ways.

  1. 1d ago

    EP265: One Relationship. Two Experiences.

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart Podcast, Kreed explores one of the most painful and perplexing questions estranged parents ask: How can my adult child remember our relationship so differently than I do? She introduces a perspective - that there was never just one relationship. There were always two: the relationship the parent experienced and the relationship the child experienced. Rather than asking whose memories are "right," Kreed invites listeners to consider a different question: What was it like to be my child inside the relationship I remember? Through a relational lens, she explains why parents often remember the relationship through their intentions, sacrifices, and responsibilities, while adult children remember it through their emotional experience, sense of safety, and whether they felt truly seen. This episode challenges the assumption that shared events create shared experiences and explores how curiosity - not certainty - can become the first step toward greater understanding and, when possible, reconciliation. In this episode, you will learn: Why parents and adult children often carry two very different experiences of the same relationship. The difference between remembering events and remembering emotional experiences. Why understanding another person's reality does not require abandoning your own. Takeaways 1. There was never just one relationship. Parents and children often experience the same family through entirely different emotional realities. Both perspectives can be genuine without being identical. 2. Intentions and experiences are different kinds of truth.A parent's loving intentions do not automatically determine how their child experienced the relationship.  RESOURCES & SUPPORT Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you. In this episode, you'll learn:Key Takeaways

  2. Jul 19

    EP264: Hard Truths Require Soft Landings

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed discusses the difference between measuring a moment and measuring a pattern, why safety and comfort aren't the same thing, what repair actually sounds like, and Kreed's answer to the parents who ask if any of this just amounts to walking on eggshells.A viral claim says adult children who won't tolerate "difficult conversations" are setting themselves up for a lonely life. Kreed pushes back on the premise and makes the case that the real question was never whether hard truths get said, but whether the relationship is strong enough to hold them. KEY TAKE AWAYS Challenge isn't the problem. Shame paired with challenge is. Most adult children aren't asking for relationships free of disagreement. They're asking that hard truths stop arriving bundled with contempt, dismissal, or a demand for compliance. Repair predicts outcomes more than conflict does. Two people can say the exact same hurtful thing. The one who gets curious about the impact instead of defending the intent is the one building a relationship that can survive being wrong. Safety and comfort are not the same word. Growth requires discomfort. It doesn't require unsafety. Confusing the two means fighting the wrong battle -  trying to convince someone that life is hard, instead of asking whether the relationship stays intact while they move through something hard together. RESOURCES & SUPPORT Facebook Support Group for Estranged Moms of Adult Children (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform)

  3. Jul 15

    EP263: Fitting In vs Belonging in Families

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed explores Brené Brown's distinction between fitting in and belonging and how it may help parents understand one of the most painful disconnects in family estrangement. What if the closeness you remember with your adult child was real and your child was also adapting in ways you could not see? Kreed examines how adaptation can be mistaken for closeness, why sibling comparison tells us very little about an individual child's experience, and why adult children sometimes appear to change after therapy, marriage, parenthood, or exposure to a different family culture. For some adult children, what parents experience as distance may be the beginning of the child's effort to develop a stronger sense of self. The episode also explores why renewed contact does not automatically create belonging. During reconciliation, an adult child may still be determining whether they can remain connected without returning to the role they once occupied in the family. For parents, this creates a deeper question than whether their child has returned: Can the relationship make room for the person their child has become? Finally, Kreed turns the question of belonging toward mothers themselves. Many mothers learned to preserve relationships through sacrifice, accommodation, and self-abandonment. Understanding the difference between fitting in and belonging may require parents to examine not only the emotional culture they created for their children, but whether they have ever truly experienced belonging to themselves. Take Aways Adaptation can look remarkably similar to closeness.  Belonging becomes visible when a child stops fitting the familiar role.  Reconciliation asks whether both parent and adult child can belong to themselves while remaining connected.  RESOURCES & SUPPORT Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.

  4. Jul 8

    EP262: The Right Words

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed explores the emotional dynamics behind parental responses to their adult children's expressions of hurt, focusing on trauma responses, emotional safety, and healing practices. Key Topics Trauma responses in parents and children The importance of emotional safety in repair The role of curiosity over control Patterns of defense: denial, deflection, dismissal The impact of childhood home environment on adult reactions The process of genuine repair and healing RESOURCES & SUPPORT Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.

  5. Jul 5

    EP261: What Holds Families Together Now?

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed explores how the digital age has transformed family dynamics, shifting the role of information and connection. She discusses the impact of technology on relationships, the changing ecology of family, and how to foster deeper, more meaningful bonds in a digital world. Key Topics The impact of technology on family communication How the environment has changed the role of families The shift from practical needs to emotional safety The importance of curiosity in relationships Reimagining family connection in a digital world RESOURCES & SUPPORT Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.

  6. Jun 15

    EP260: Pain - Where Does It Go?

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed explores the profound emotional and physical impact of estrangement between parents and adult children. She discusses the biological basis of attachment, the importance of proper pain management, and pathways toward healing and reconciliation. TAKEAWAYS - Estrangement causes a unique form of grief. - Reaching out to an estranged child is driven by attachment biology, not manipulation. - Pain should not be displaced onto other children or social media. - Healing involves understanding and metabolizing pain, not just managing it. RESOURCES & SUPPORT Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.

  7. Jun 10

    EP259: How Power Kills Empathy

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed explores the impact of power on empathy within hierarchical relationships like families and workplaces. She emphasizes the importance of tenderness and perspective-taking for healing and reconciliation. Key Topics The impact of power on empathy and compassion Hierarchical systems in families and organizations The importance of tenderness in repair and reconciliation Perspective-taking as a tool for empathy and healing Structural causes of estrangement and pathways to reconciliation Resources & Support Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.

  8. Jun 3

    EP258: Beneath The Control - the fear-driven parent

    In this episode of The Estranged Heart podcast, Kreed shares a personal and professional exploration of controlling parenting rooted in fear, its impact on estranged relationships, and pathways to healing by understanding underlying fears. Key Topics - Fear as the root of controlling behavior - The cycle of fear, control, and estrangement - Different fears manifesting as control behaviors 02:57 Understanding Control in Parenting 06:12 The Cycle of Fear and Control 11:57 Estrangement and Its Impact on Parents 16:59 Reframing Control and Fear 22:10 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Resources & Support Facebook Support Group (facilitated by Kreed) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/estrangedmotherssupportgroup One-on-One Services Private coaching Consulting Mediation services Connect with Kreed: Website: theestrangedheart.com Email: hello@theestrangedheart.com Support the work: Buy Me a Coffee (donation platform) Disclaimer: Kreed Revere is not a licensed therapist. Nothing in this podcast should be considered or taken as therapy. If you need therapeutic support, please seek out a therapist near you.

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4.8
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About

Support and community for navigating the emotional storms of parent and adult child estrangement and repairing and transforming relationships with one another in healthy and productive ways.

Information

  • Creator
    The Estranged Heart
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    269
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © The Estranged Heart
  • Show Website
    The Estranged Heart

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