
292 episodes

The Fifth Column Kmele Foster, Michael Moynihan, and Matt Welch
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4.6 • 2.2K Ratings
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Your weekly rhetorical assault on the on the news cycle, the people who make it, and occasionally ourselves. Kmele Foster (Freethink), Michael Moynihan (Vice), and Matt Welch (Reason) talk and laugh and drink their way to at least quasi-sanity in a world gone mad, often with the aid of clean and articulate guests. Weekly Members Only subscription edition often comes with listener mail and professional-quality (if inappropriate) singing. Analysis. Commentary. Sedition.
wethefifth.substack.com
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363 "Guns, Abortion, The End of All Things"
“Tear it down. Start over again. We can make a brand new start.” - Blue Mafic
A Bad Omen
Judicial Superfluity
Beyond Roe
unenumerated, natural, ipse dixit
Carry Concealed
Conservative Excesss, Judicial Restraint
Europe is Always Better
“Sand in every damn gear…”
Antidemocratic AF
Release the Transcripts
Recorded: June 25th, 2022
Published: June 26th, 2022
This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wethefifth.substack.com/subscribe -
362 "Trump's Deranged, Bed Stuy Replacement Theory"
You Got a Friend
Restrictive Covenant
#MJInnocent
Beefin with TSA
Blockchain Nostradamus
A Very Bad Thing/The Worst Possible Thing
What Barr Knew
Clear and Present Danger
Google: maps of Capitol tunnels
The Blame Game
Can’t White a Book
Quietest Jazz Solo
Great Replacement Theory (But It’s Fine)
The Al Sharpton
This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wethefifth.substack.com/subscribe -
361 w/ Ilya Shapiro "Free Speech, Free San Francisco, Free Weigel"
Kmele is flying
Dude has four parents. Not one isn’t a terrorist
The decline and fall of San Francisco, Part I
Fiona Dourif’s piece on how California fails the mentally ill
A sexy retweet
Ilya Shapiro quits Georgetown. He stops by to tell us why
Ilya apologized. Should he have?
He mentioned it, we’ll link to it: the paperback edition of Supreme Disorder
Shapiro: Cato abandoned me
Dave Weigel gets suspended because of his colleague and “close friend,” Sammy “the Bull” Sonmez,” rats him out
Another editors note re: the TikTok lady
A St. Louis Cardinal tweeted bad words when he was 14
Everything is dumb
CNN retools, but all the tools still work there
If you ask the question “should I have kids on account of climate change,” you probably shouldn’t have kids
A primetime January 6th hearing, produced by Busby Berkeley
Breaking: Chesa the Chavista needs a new job
The decline and fall of San Francisco, Part II
This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wethefifth.substack.com/subscribe -
360 "Defamation, Pride, and Very Special Needs"
Imperfect Introduction
Queerest story ever told
The heart-pounding conclusion of Depp v Heard
Birdwatching for Karens
A firearms "clarification"
The other 99% (and the warmth of simple narratives)
Incitement for “journalists”
Half Junky / Half Wonk
The absurd hilarity of historical injustice
Believe All Jedi
Fixing CNN+ (“Toobin After Dark” Edition)
Star Wars is for racists
Chief Colt 45
Total Recall, Certain Guilt
You always need more gays
Professional crybabies
The Pride of Prejudice
This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wethefifth.substack.com/subscribe -
359 - A Massacre in Texas, An Incident in the Bronx, A Helicopter to Newark
Another mass shooting, more performative outrage (note: and this was recorded right before Beto’s gross little stunt), and never any practical solutions. The lads discuss the massacre in Texas, a “racist” incident at Yankee Stadium, a terrible Marvel movie, and a proposed new female superhero. Oh and as Moynihan explains in his brief preamble, the Rodecaster Pro is a horrible piece of audio hardware that ate 28 minutes of this podcast…but if you’re an audio genius—and this might take a genius to fix—and you want a copy of the muddy, robotic bit to tinker with….feel free to reach out.
And as previously pointed out, your free trial is ending soon. So make not to be a filthy freeloader and sign up for real.
This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wethefifth.substack.com/subscribe -
358 - Live at the Comedy Cellar w/ Michael Rapaport and Colin Quinn
In celebration of the Fifth’s triumphant move to Substack, the lads decided to do a live show in New York City, with the two most New York City guys they could find. But that live show in New York City sold out immediately, provoking a flurry of angry and/or heartbroken emails. So how does one skip the queue for the next one? Well, tickets are released to subscribers first. And our subscribers are bored and like to get liquored in the middle of the week. You see what we’re getting at?
Now, it’s nothing like the sweaty, drunken energy of the Comedy Cellar on a Wednesday night, but this is a pretty reasonable facsimile: we present to you, in all of its random and rambling glory, an unedited recording of The Fifth Column live at the Comedy Cellar. A huge thanks to Michael Rapaport and Colin Quinn, who finished the show out. A few video clips forthcoming. And more pics over at Moynihan’s Instagram.
This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit wethefifth.substack.com/subscribe
Customer Reviews
Love the show
Love the show, guests and banter.
Moynihan clearly loves the sound of his voice and dominates the conversation. He also talks over Kmele too much. Want more Kmele.
No mas
I used to listen to this for nuanced analysis of today’s news but I couldn’t get through the last episode. The one host that always dominates is such a smug know-it-all and his takes often really miss the mark. Unsubscribed
Not for me
I unsubscribed after the Texas school shooting episode.
Take your nonchalant, “everybody else is a hysterical moron” attitude - and keep it, I guess. But I’m done with that schtick. You guys showed more emotion in regards to Louis CK’s cancelling. It’s kinda gross. Making fun of Steve Kerr - also gross. He wasn’t just banging on the table shouting “We gotta do something!” He was talking about a specific bill stuck in Senate. Plus, he lost his father to gun violence.
The fact that none of the gun control measures currently considered would have prevented many of the mass shootings is sad and infuriating. Using it to make yourselves appear sophisticated, most thoughtful and best informed is jarring, and dumb. Duh, obvi it wouldn’t be enough, because what we actually need is a national ban on assault weapons, but our politicians are either too feckless or corrupt to even put it on the table.
Maybe you guys drink too much. You numb yourselves out and then make fun of people with normal, healthy emotions.
Giving the podcast 5 stars because you guys have the right to your opinions and attitudes, and I spent many great hours listening. So that’s my thanks.
It’s all for the best. I recently quit drinking, so this pod wouldn’t be an ideal companion anyway.