Works Every Time

5.0 (4)
COMEDY
UPDATED WEEKLY

The WET Podcast: Monday's with Justin Essenmacher, Markus Olind, & Phillip Garcia (prod. JJ)

4D AGO

The Fast and The Furious is Propaganda

SEE US LIVE Blue Water Comedy Festival, Port Huron MI 4/1, 8pm https://ticketstripe.com/BWCFShowcase-WETLivePod MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW EHSAN https://ehsancomedy.com/ https://www.instagram.com/ehsanjahmad/ Podcast - https://www.youtube.com/@TheSolidShow2024 Too Soon - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6weMUz0lqA THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:01:23 Live Show Recap 00:03:30 Were doing a show at SXSW! 00:06:31 Austin Buford Shooting 00:07:13 Markus needs his bottle 00:12:30 Wetter Boys 00:14:15 Are we at "war" with Iran? 00:15:45 Trump is Lord Farquaad 00:18:45 Austin Shooting continued.. 00:26:32 Justin's Worst Customer Ever 00:32:00 WET LLC is Hemorrhaging Money 00:33:40 Bit pitch 00:37:24 New Shirt Idea 00:41:12 A visitor enters the studio w/ impeccable timing 00:43:38 NEW SEGMENT (Last Year, This Week) 00:55:00 How The Wet boys would handle the afterlife ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass @TheSolidShow2024 #podcast #comedy

1h 9m
MAR 2

Elon Has No Motion (feat. Ehsan Ahmad)

SEE US LIVE Blue Water Comedy Festival, Port Huron MI 4/1, 8pm https://ticketstripe.com/BWCFShowcase-WETLivePod MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW EHSAN https://ehsancomedy.com/ https://www.instagram.com/ehsanjahmad/ Podcast - https://www.youtube.com/@TheSolidShow2024 Too Soon - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6weMUz0lqA THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 - This week on WET… 00:01:23 - Ignorance is bliss 00:04:48 - Scams are getting good 00:06:50 - Why Just For Laughs went bankrupt 00:09:03 - SPEAK TO A REPRESENTATIVE type sh*t 00:12:37 - The 2016 election makes so much sense post Epstein 00:17:52 - It's like The Matrix but everyone's a pedophile 00:21:40 - There's always another child sex cult 00:25:25 - McGraw Hill was owned by Ghislaine Maxwell's Dad 00:27:23 - Release the classified alien files on Reels 00:29:33 - Is Elon a bad dad? 00:32:30 - Can't joke about Abraham Lincoln yet 00:39:18 - The real reason Prince Andrew got arrested 00:42:28 - Corruption is a consequence of being alive 00:45:25 - Bengali vs Bangladeshi 00:47:30 - Western Muslims 00:50:16 - Baked potato adventure 00:51:53 - What pisses off Ehsan most about Deric Poston 00:54:54 - If our parents knew what we complained about 00:58:38 - WTF even is "reading comprehension" 01:04:08 - The Black Israelites are in a different algorithm 01:07:25 - Jay-Z is the Jackie Robinson of the Epstein files 01:12:18 - Society has always felt like it was about to collapse 01:17:25 - Driving is going to be obsolete in our lifetime 01:22:21 - Ehsan got road raged by a Waymo ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass @TheSolidShow2024 #podcast #comedy

1h 30m
FEB 23

Behind the Scenes of Austin's Poker Streams (feat. Uncle Lazer)

SEE US LIVE Blue Water Comedy Festival, Port Huron MI 4/1, 8pm https://ticketstripe.com/BWCFShowcase-WETLivePod MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW LAZER https://www.instagram.com/uncle_lazer/ https://www.youtube.com/@unclelazer THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 - This week on WET… 00:00:52 - The power of the harmonica 00:06:14 - Online casinos have better customer support than US Healthcare 00:10:18 - Behind the scenes of the Austin poker games 00:17:35 - Lazer's virginity story explains so much 00:24:51 - They're jerkin off in the fast food 00:26:23 - Lazer's OF is wild 00:31:46 - How Lazer got blown on a podcast 00:36:23 - Lazer's origin story 00:39:24 - You can't have a plan B 00:43:12 - Lazer wants to go out like Kurt Cobain 00:47:56 - You don't need money to do comedy 00:54:03 - Lazer's secret to standup 01:00:00 - Lazer in black rooms 01:04:05 - Sunset vs Mothership ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass @unclelazer #podcast #comedy

1h 11m
FEB 16

Waymos Are Just Filipinos

SEE US LIVE Sunset Strip Comedy Club, Austin TX 2/21, 8pm Code ' WET50' for 50% off tickets https://www.sunsetstripatx.com/?event-id=128112 Blue Water Comedy Festival, Port Huron MI 4/1, 8pm https://ticketstripe.com/BWCFShowcase-WETLivePod MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:01:53 Phil's biggest fear 00:04:08 Scariest Harry Potter 00:07:51 Waymos are really just Filipinos 00:09:26 Why Greg Abbot is evil 00:12:43 Insurance fraud used to be American 00:19:32 Luigi actually made United better 00:23:15 Phil has been listening to NPR Austin 00:27:23 Liberal and conservative argue about public transport 00:34:32 Markus trolled the volunteers on election day 00:38:26 Justin's jihad 00:48:56 Bit pitch 00:54:24 Stop starting podcasts 00:56:19 F*ck volunteers 00:59:04 Weiner dog with normal sized legs 01:05:28 Bonus episode for members EVERY WEEK ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

1h 7m
FEB 10

El Super Bowl (feat. Colton Jones)

SEE US LIVE Sunset Strip Comedy Club, Austin TX 2/21, 8pm Code ' WET50' for 50% off tickets https://www.sunsetstripatx.com/?event-id=128112 Blue Water Comedy Festival, Port Huron MI 4/1, 8pm https://ticketstripe.com/BWCFShowcase-WETLivePod MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW COLTON https://www.instagram.com/ilovecoltonjones/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 0:00 - This week on WET… 0:53 - Melding our minds 2:13 - Justin's grandma and Colton have a special relationship 4:44 - Colton is back on the sauce 7:58 - Hot black b*tches love Pokémon 9:26 - Finding lost dogs is more important than your civil rights 12:33 - Robert Kraft mac n cheese 14:47 - Colton is bullying Justin at work 16:36 - Colton threw up in the yard 19:53 - Colton and Justin got beef 23:03 - Cool Ranch Oreos (tm) 25:56 - If she don't own her own business she ain't getting none of my fitness 26:56 - What GPT stands for 31:59 - Justin's resume looks like the files 36:53 - Drama at Sunset 43:35 - I GOT NOTHIN 47:31 - Markus show and tell 49:40 - No one cared about this Super Bowl 55:29 - Dork vs nerd 58:17 - Gutter sluts 1:00:44 - The disc golf story 1:05:29 - The best part about the Super Bowl 1:08:20 - The best commercial of the night ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

1h 16m
FEB 2

Has TikTok Ruined Baseball?

SEE US LIVE Sunset Strip Comedy Club, Austin TX 2/21, 8pm Code ' WET50' for 50% off tickets https://www.sunsetstripatx.com/?event-id=128112 MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 0:00 - This week on WET… 1:43 - What Markus ate before the podcast 4:35 - Trump on China's One Child Policy 6:48 - Reacting to Tiktok Baseball (Savannah Bananas) 15:53 - Justin is a veteran of the war on drugs 18:39 - We're so old it literally hurts 20:37 - Doing grandpa's drugs 23:15 - We're gonna be STARS in Nashville 26:12 - Bit Pitch 37:22 - How to train your Mexican girlfriend 43:48 - The people working at Cheba Hut are too damn high 50:59 - Red Lobster Moment 53:33 - Invisible riff 55:50 - If you have boxers that remind you of All American Rejects, get rid of them 57:46 - Arc Raiders teaches you who you really are ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

1h 6m
JAN 26

Trump Gave Up on Greenland

SEE US LIVE Sunset Strip Comedy Club, Austin TX 2/21, 8pm Code ' WET50' for 50% off tickets https://www.sunsetstripatx.com/?event-id=128112 MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS Code 'WET' for 25% off tickets https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 - This week on WET… 00:01:20 - Making the world a wetter place 00:04:55 - We could never replace Phil 00:06:24 - Maximum Liability Corporation 00:07:34 - Brown, Guy doesn't find joke funny 00:11:06 - The first official meeting of the WET board of directors 00:18:15 - Bit Pitch 00:26:10 - Justin was like so totally ill last weekend 00:32:58 - Phil built different 00:36:42 - Eating old bananas to get drunk 00:40:17 - Requiem for a Justin 00:43:56 - Grok is being naughty 00:46:57 - Hooters is good, goddamnit! 00:49:47 - Addressing the backlash 00:51:43 - How to turn down free alcohol 00:54:20 - Should we move the pod to Greenland? 01:00:08 - Greg Abbot, come on the podcast! 01:04:15 - Become a member! ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedymemes

1h 8m
JAN 19

Crust Punks at Warped Tour (feat. Ronaldo Mercado)

SEE US LIVE Sunset Strip Comedy Club, Austin TX 2/21, 8pm https://www.sunsetstripatx.com/?event-id=128112 MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ SUNSET TICKETS https://sunsetstripatx.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'WET' for 25% off your recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW RONALDO: https://www.instagram.com/ronaldosuckss/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 0:00 - This week on WET… 1:29 - Go into movies blind 2:45 - Respect THE Home Depot 5:03 - Ronaldo has some notes 7:13 - Justin invents a new word? 9:37 - Jacking off to playing cards 15:25 - A hangover so bad you actually quit drinking 21:29 - Crust Punks at Warped Tour 28:48 - Being late with a coffee 34:58 - Ronaldo was a writer on Def Jam 37:39 - We are rockstars 41:49 - Imagine if there were French people in Canada? 43:14 - Defensive Nazi and Mexican Survivor 46:49 - Movies were better in the car 50:28 - Finding love at the family reunion 53:31 - Ronaldo's life is a Blink-182 song 1:00:13 - Louder with Krauter 1:05:02 - Become a MEMBER! ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ⁠⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy @JustinEssenmacher ⁠⁠ @markusolind9761 ⁠ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedymemes

1h 6m

See All (116)

out of 5

4 Ratings

Love from Adjacent Podcast

02/25/2025

The Grabes

Yalls friend Gariet at Jack Allen’s told us about yalls show! Adding yall to our podroll! Had no idea about March 14 steak and a BJ! Keep sharing! Are any of yall single- we would love to interview you for our show!
Well well well.

05/20/2024

trilldaddy0189

For almost 2 decades now the podcast industry has been what some may considered to be a stagnant and an uncreative market, but thank God these three boys have thrown a figurative M80 into the pond to disrupt the stillness that was the podcast industry.
Goofy and genuine

03/25/2024

Drobro710

Love this podcast so much, it’s a lot of fun! Always good for a laugh and look forward to seeing what these knuckle heads get into every week!

The WET Podcast: Monday's with Justin Essenmacher, Markus Olind, & Phillip Garcia (prod. JJ)

Creator

Works Every Time
Years Active

2024 - 2026
Episodes

116
Rating

Explicit
Show Website

Works Every Time

Comedy Interviews

Comedy Interviews

Updated Weekly
Comedy

Comedy

Updated Weekly
Stand-Up

Stand-Up

Updated Daily
Stand-Up

Stand-Up

Updated Weekly
Stand-Up

Stand-Up

Updated Weekly
Comedy

Comedy

Updated Weekly
Comedy

Comedy

Updated Weekly

Works Every Time

The Fast and The Furious is Propaganda

Elon Has No Motion (feat. Ehsan Ahmad)

Behind the Scenes of Austin's Poker Streams (feat. Uncle Lazer)

Waymos Are Just Filipinos

El Super Bowl (feat. Colton Jones)

Has TikTok Ruined Baseball?

Trump Gave Up on Greenland

Crust Punks at Warped Tour (feat. Ronaldo Mercado)

Love from Adjacent Podcast

Well well well.

Goofy and genuine

About

Information

You Might Also Like

Works Every Time

Episodes

The Fast and The Furious is Propaganda

Elon Has No Motion (feat. Ehsan Ahmad)

Behind the Scenes of Austin's Poker Streams (feat. Uncle Lazer)

Waymos Are Just Filipinos

El Super Bowl (feat. Colton Jones)

Has TikTok Ruined Baseball?

Trump Gave Up on Greenland

Crust Punks at Warped Tour (feat. Ronaldo Mercado)

Ratings & Reviews

About

Information

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