You Can Be Both

Lauren Lanzaretta
  • 5.0 (1)
  • SEXUALITY
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

You Can Be Both is hosted by singer/songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, who shares honest conversations about being both gay and Christian—two identities often seen as incompatible. The podcast creates space for LGBTQ+ people of faith to find healing, community, and a deeper connection with Christ while fully embracing who they are. As a first step to your healing journey, I recommend the “LGBTQ+ Healing & Resource Guide” - go to www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth Send testimony/questions to https://bit.ly/49G1tpz

  1. 6D AGO

    This Lesbian Harvard Grad Exposes the Problem With Modern Christianity

    What happens when a Harvard Divinity School graduate, public theologian and gardening philosopher sits down with an LGBTQ Christian podcast host for over an hour of raw, unfiltered conversation about faith, sexuality, race, the church and what it means to truly know God? This. This episode happens. Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Ciarra Jones — known as the Gardening Theologian — for one of the most thought-provoking, theologically rich and deeply personal conversations the You Can Be Both podcast has ever had. Ciarra is a writer, speaker and public theologian who helps people untangle inherited beliefs and cultivate a faith that is rooted, liberated and alive. In this episode, Lauren and Ciarra explore: 🌱 Growing up Black in all-white California towns — and what that teaches you about systems of power 📖 How Ciarra's parents' divorce led her into fundamentalist Christianity — and what it took to find her way out 🏳️‍🌈 What the church gets wrong about LGBTQ identity — and what a more expansive faith looks like ✝️ The difference between a punishing God and a gentle God — and who benefits from each 🌿 How gardening became a spiritual practice and a theological framework 💬 Ex-gay theology, deconstruction, inherited belief systems and what it means to truly be free Ciarra's closing message will stay with you: What does a gentle God look like — and what does that God offer us? This episode is for anyone who has ever felt like their faith and their identity couldn't coexist. You can be both. 🌱 FOLLOW CIARRA JONES: Instagram & TikTok: @TheGardeningTheologianPodcast: The Community Garden Podcast/Substack: The Gardening Theologian 📥 FREE LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide — Lauren's full testimony plus every book, podcast and voice that helped her move from shame to freedom: 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: 🍎 Apple Music: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 🎧 Spotify: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" ▶️ YouTube: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 📲 FOLLOW LAUREN: Instagram: @LaurenLanzarettaTikTok: @LaurenLanzaretta YouTube: Lauren Lanzaretta 💛 LOVE THIS PODCAST? HERE'S HOW YOU CAN HELP: This podcast exists to remind every LGBTQ person of faith that they are not alone — and it reaches people because of YOU. ✅ Like this video — it tells the algorithm this conversation matters ✅ Leave a comment — share what resonated, ask a question, say hi ✅ Share this episode with one person who needs to hear it — a friend, a family member, someone still struggling in silence ✅ Subscribe so you never miss a Sunday episode 💛 Consider donating to help us expand this mission and reach more people who feel alone — every contribution helps us keep going and grow: https://account.venmo.com/u/youcanbeboth You are not confused. You are not broken. You are not too much. You can be both. #YouCanBeBoth #LGBTQChristian #GardeningTheologian #CiarraJones #LaurenLanzaretta #FaithAndSexuality #QueerChristian #Deconstruction #ChristianPodcast #LGBTQFaith #HarvardDivinity #BlackChristian #GentleGod #FaithAndPride #LGBTQHealing

    1h 19m

  2. MAR 22

    Christian Parents: How to Love Your LGBTQ Child Without Losing Your Faith

    What happens when a deeply Christian mom learns her daughter is gay — while sitting in a rainy parking lot before school? In this powerful episode of the You Can Be Both Podcast, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Staci Frenes — singer, songwriter, author and Christian mom — who shares the raw, emotional moment her daughter Abby came out to her at 16, and the years-long journey that followed as she learned to hold onto both her faith and her child. Staci's latest book, Love Makes Room, is a memoir about how she expanded her faith to fully embrace her daughter's LGBTQ+ identity — without letting go of God. This conversation is for every LGBTQ person who has feared coming out to their parents, and every parent who is trying to find their way.In this episode: 🏳️‍🌈 The moment Staci's daughter came out — and how she responded 🙏 How a conservative Christian mom reconciled her faith with her child's identity 💔 The two years of pain before Abby could say the words out loud ❤️ What Staci wants every LGBTQ person — and every parent — to hear 📖 How her book Love Makes Room is giving families a third way forward 📥 FREE LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide — includes Lauren's full testimony and every book, podcast and voice that helped her move from shame to freedom: 👉 laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 📖 Get Staci's book Love Makes Room — available on Amazon and everywhere books are sold: https://amzn.to/4t1zk2Q 🎵 LISTEN TO LAUREN'S MUSIC: 🍎 Apple Music: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 🎧 Spotify: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" ▶️ YouTube: Search "Lauren Lanzaretta" 📲 FOLLOW LAUREN: Instagram: @Lanzaretta TikTok: @Lanzaretta YouTube: Lauren Lanzaretta 💬 If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear that they are not confused, not broken, not too much — and that they can be both. #YouCanBeBoth #LGBTQChristian #ChristianMom #LGBTQFaith #ComingOut #LoveMakesRoom #LaurenLanzaretta #ChristianPodcast #LGBTQHealing #FaithAndPride #ComingOutStory #ChristianParents #LGBTQParents #Affirming

    1h 8m

  3. MAR 15

    Separating God's Love From the Hate You Were Taught in Church

    Have you ever wondered if God actually loves you — or if the hate you've heard from others is the truth? In this solo episode of You Can Be Both, host Lauren Lanzaretta takes a break from guests to speak directly to her community about one of the most important questions LGBTQ people of faith wrestle with: does God love me, exactly as I am?Lauren reads a powerful listener testimony from a woman who grew up Amish, survived years of sexual abuse, came out as a lesbian, and found her way back to God — and uses it to explore how we separate a loving God from the painful messages we've received from religion and family. This episode is for anyone who has been told they're going to hell, who has walked away from their faith because of shame, or who is quietly wondering if there's still a place for them at God's table. There is.Lauren also shares exciting updates on what's coming for the You Can Be Both community — including a private community app, one-on-one mentoring calls, live retreats, and monthly group Zoom calls.In this episode:-A moving listener testimony about surviving abuse, coming out, and returning to faith-How to separate God's love from hateful religious messaging-Why your relationship with God as an LGBTQ person is powerful — not disqualified-A prayer over every person listening this week-Exciting community updates including a private app, mentoring calls, and live eventsFree LGBTQ Healing and Resource Guide — including Lauren's full testimony and every book, podcast, and voice that helped her move from shame to freedom — https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth📧 Sign up for community updates and be the first to know when the app launches: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeJWqrj3WinN-Li_TqY3RtMc8L3WTUw9jCikDQ6NPtyjOlAJg/viewform💛 If this podcast has helped you, consider sharing it with someone who needs it — or donating to help this message reach people still struggling in silence.Find Lauren's music on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Music — search Lauren Lanzaretta📲 Follow You Can Be Both:Instagram | TikTok | YouTubeNew episodes every Sunday at 11 a.m.

    34 min

  4. MAR 8

    "Homosexual" Wasn't in the Bible Until 1946 — Here's How A Mistranslation Fueled LGBTQ+ Hate

    Did the word “homosexual” really appear in the Bible for the first time in 1946? In this episode of the You Can Be Both podcast, host Lauren Lanzaretta interviews Sharon “Rocky” Roggio, director of the documentary 1946: The Mistranslation That Shifted Culture. The film investigates how the word homosexual entered an English Bible translation for the FIRST TIME in 1946 — and how that translation has shaped modern conversations around Christianity, LGBTQ identity, and faith. Using archived research from Yale University, scholars, and historical records, the documentary explores how a translation decision influenced theology, culture, and the global debate about LGBTQ people in the church. If you’ve ever asked: • Can you be LGBTQ and Christian? • Does the Bible actually condemn homosexuality? • What happened in the 1946 Bible translation? This conversation breaks down the history, the scholarship, and the real-life impact. ⸻ 🎙 In This Episode 00:00 – Introduction to the You Can Be Both podcast 01:40 – Why the documentary 1946 is so important 03:50 – The discovery of the Bible mistranslation 06:00 – Why the director quit her job to make this film 10:00 – Growing up Christian and LGBTQ 12:00 – How the translation controversy was discovered 19:00 – Why allies are essential in LGBTQ faith spaces 21:00 – The impact the film has had worldwide 27:00 – Understanding the original Greek context 33:00 – The “clobber verses” explained 38:00 – Navigating faith as an LGBTQ Christian 46:00 – Family, faith, and difficult conversations 54:00 – What’s next for the 1946 movement ⸻ 🎬 Watch the Documentary1946: The Mistranslation That Shifted Culture Streaming on major platforms including Amazon, Apple TV, and YouTube. Learn more:https://1946themovie.com ⸻ 🌈 About the Podcast You Can Be Both explores the intersection of faith, identity, and healing from religious trauma.The show features conversations with theologians, filmmakers, creators, and LGBTQ Christians who are redefining what faith can look like. 🌈 LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide: https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🎵 Lauren's music: search Lauren Lanzaretta on Spotify, Apple Music & YouTube ⸻ 🔔 Subscribe for More Conversations About: LGBTQ Christianity Faith and sexuality Bible translation history Christian deconstruction Inclusive theology #1946Documentary#LGBTQChristian#FaithAndSexuality#BibleTranslation#christiandeconstruction If this episode helped you, share it with someone who needs to hear it. Support You Can Be Both: https://account.venmo.com/u/youcanbeboth

    1h 5m

  5. MAR 1

    I Married a Man... Then Realized I'm a LESBIAN | Christian Coming Out Story

    What happens when you grow up evangelical, marry a man, build a life… and then realize you’re actually a lesbian? In this powerful episode of the You Can Be Both Podcast, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Sophia Spallino — luxury lesbian matchmaker and founder of The Queer Country Club — to talk about coming out at 29, leaving a heterosexual marriage, losing everything, and rebuilding a life rooted in truth, faith, and aligned partnership. Sophia shares: • Growing up in evangelical Christianity • Suppressing same-sex attraction for years • Marrying a man while knowing something wasn’t right • The moment she finally admitted, “I’m a lesbian” • Losing her home, finances, and stability after coming out • Why so many married Christian women are secretly struggling • What lesbians are REALLY looking for in a partner • The truth about monogamy, dating apps, and modern queer dating • Why faith and sexuality don’t have to be opposites If you’ve ever felt torn between your faith and your identity… this conversation is for you. Share this with someone who needs to hear it! ✨ You can be both LGBTQ and a person of faith. ✨ Follow us on @Youcanbeboth, @Lanzaretta ⸻ 🔗 Resources Mentioned: • LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide: https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth • Queer Country Club Dating Platform: https://queercountryclub.com/ • Follow Sophia: https://www.instagram.com/sophiaspallino/?hl=en #ChristianLesbian #LateBloomingLesbian #ComingOutStory #FaithAndSexuality #ExEvangelical #LesbianDating #QueerChristian #LGBTQFaith #ReligiousTrauma #WomenLovingWomen #LesbianMatchmaker

    1h 8m

  6. FEB 22

    Can You Be Trans and Christian? One Former Megachurch Pastor Says Yes — and She’s Running for Office

    Can you be transgender and Christian? What happens when a megachurch pastor comes out as trans? And why is she now running for public office? In this powerful episode of You Can Be Both, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Joanna Whaley, a former evangelical megachurch pastor who was outed, fired, and subjected to 15 years of conversion therapy — and is now running for the Michigan House of Representatives. Joanna shares:     •    What 15 years of conversion therapy did to her mental health     •    The real experience of gender dysphoria     •    What it felt like to lose her job after being outed     •    Why she still identifies as a Christian     •    How Christian nationalism impacts LGBTQ people     •    Her response to rhetoric from Donald Trump and the rise of anti-trans legislation     •    Why she believes we’re in a “100-year battle” for LGBTQ inclusion in the church • Why she's running for Michigan House of Representatives Joanna previously served at one of America’s largest megachurches, including Life Church, and holds a seminary degree focused on liberation and queer theology. Today, she works as a clinical chaplain and advocates for LGBTQ+ Christians seeking faith without shame. If you’ve ever wondered:     •    Is being LGBTQ a sin?     •    What does the Bible really say about trans people?     •    Can you follow Jesus and affirm queer identities?     •    How do you survive coming out in evangelical spaces? This conversation is for you. 💬 “You are not a problem for God.” That message alone could change someone’s life. ⸻ 📌 Resources Mentioned     •    LGBTQ Healing & Resource Guide: https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth     •    Support Joanna’s campaign: https://www.joannawhaley.com/ If this episode encouraged you, don’t forget to: 👍 Like 🔔 Subscribe 📤 Share with someone who needs hope You can be LGBTQ. You can love Jesus. You don’t have to choose. #TransChristian #LGBTQFaith #Exvangelical #ChristianNationalism #GenderDysphoria #ConversionTherapy #ProgressiveChristianity #FaithAndPolitics #QueerTheology #MichiganPolitics

    1h 19m

  7. FEB 15

    The Psychological Damage of Being Told You’re Going to Hell | Explained by a Therapist

    To inquire about Candace's services please visit: https://www.thechristiancloset.com/ Follow her on Instagram at: @lesbiantherapist Can you be gay and Christian? What does growing up LGBTQ in the church actually do to your mental health? And how do you heal from years of being told you’re going to hell? In this episode of You Can Be Both, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with licensed therapist Candice Czubernat, founder of The Christian Closet and an LGBTQ+ affirming counseling practice, to unpack religious trauma, conversion therapy, shame, and the psychological impact of growing up gay in conservative Christianity. Candice shares her journey from attending Moody Bible Institute to falling in love with a woman, navigating spiritual abuse, and eventually building a thriving practice helping LGBTQ Christians heal. In this episode, we discuss: • What religious trauma does to your nervous system • The psychological damage of being told you’re going to hell • How conversion therapy harms LGBTQ people • How to tell the difference between fear and Holy Spirit conviction • Why “sin feels good” theology is deeply damaging • Learning to trust yourself again • Healing shame as a gay Christian • Rebuilding your relationship with God • What affirming therapy should actually look like If you’ve ever struggled with anxiety, shame, fear of hell, or distrust of yourself because of your sexuality and faith — this episode is for you. You are not broken. You are not beyond God’s love. And healing is possible. 📖 Download the LGBTQ Christian Healing Guide: https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 🎙 Subscribe for more conversations on faith, sexuality, and mental health 💬 Share this with someone who needs to hear it 📲 Follow us on TikTok and Instagram  ⁨@YouCanBeBoth⁩

    1 hr

  8. FEB 8

    Does Conversion Therapy Work? A Survivor Tells the TRUTH

    Does conversion therapy work? What actually happens behind closed doors in Christian “ex-gay” programs—and why do people stay for years? In this episode of The You Can Be Both Podcast, host Lauren Lanzaretta sits down with Timothy Rodriguez, author of Conversion Therapy Dropout, for a raw, unfiltered conversation about surviving eight years of conversion therapy, working behind the scenes for some of the biggest evangelical megachurches (including Hillsong, Elevation Church, and Willow Creek), and reclaiming faith after religious trauma. Timothy shares:     •    What conversion therapy really looks like (it’s not what most people think)    •    Why conversion therapy doesn’t change sexuality—but does cause deep psychological harm     •    How churches promote “belonging” while quietly silencing LGBTQ people     •    The truth behind the “ex-gay” movement and why it fails     •    How shame, repression, and spiritual abuse nearly destroyed his life     •    Why LGBTQ Christians often feel closer to God after coming out, not farther away     •    Why conversion therapy is still happening today—and growingThis conversation also breaks down:     •    The role of megachurch culture in sustaining harmful theology     •    How conversion therapy has gone underground under “religious freedom”     •    Why trans and nonbinary youth are now the primary targets     •    What it means to be both LGBTQ and Christian without self-hatred ⚠️ Trigger warning: This episode discusses religious trauma, mental health crises, and conversion therapy practices. If you’re questioning your faith, your sexuality, or what you’ve been told about God—you are not alone. 📘 Get the LGBTQ Christian Healing & Resource Guide:https://www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth 📚 Learn more about Timothy Rodriguez & Conversion Therapy Dropout: https://amzn.to/45OiADa Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timothy.s.rodriguez/?hl=en 🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on faith, queerness, healing, and spiritual freedom 🎧 Available on Spotify and all podcast platforms TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 – Does Conversion Therapy Work? (The Truth) 02:26 – 8 Years in Conversion Therapy: “Spoiler Alert: No” 05:26 – Working for Megachurches While Hiding His Identity 07:11 – “Everyone’s Welcome”… Until You’re Gay 09:06 – Outed by a Youth Pastor 12:05 – Calling Exodus International 13:48 – What Conversion Therapy Really Looks Like 17:46 – Why People Stay Trapped for Years 22:31 – The Moment Everything Fell Apart 24:26 – “I Would Rather Die Than Live Like This” 25:08 – Hospitalization & Breaking Free 30:08 – Why He Wrote Conversion Therapy Dropout 33:01 – Why He Didn’t Walk Away from God 36:17 – LGBTQ Christians & Real Faith 41:21 – Is Conversion Therapy Still Happening Today? 45:52 – Why Trans & Nonbinary People Are Now the Target 47:19 – The Realization There Was No End 56:17 – Prayer

    59 min
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About

You Can Be Both is hosted by singer/songwriter Lauren Lanzaretta, who shares honest conversations about being both gay and Christian—two identities often seen as incompatible. The podcast creates space for LGBTQ+ people of faith to find healing, community, and a deeper connection with Christ while fully embracing who they are. As a first step to your healing journey, I recommend the “LGBTQ+ Healing & Resource Guide” - go to www.laurenlanzaretta.com/youcanbeboth Send testimony/questions to https://bit.ly/49G1tpz

Information

  • Creator
    Lauren Lanzaretta
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    22
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Lauren Lanzaretta
  • Show Website
    You Can Be Both

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