Grow the Good

Sonya Looney
  • 4.7 (21)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Grow the Good, formerly The Sonya Looney Show, is your guide to continual personal growth, meaningful connections, and positive impact in the world. Challenge the idea that you are broken or need fixing. Instead, discover how to cultivate the good that already exists within you and amplify the strengths and potential you may not yet realize you have. Grounded in the science of positive psychology and guided by the pillars of purpose, vitality, resilience, hope, and connection, each episode is packed with tools, stories, and evidence-backed insights to help you create a more authentic and flourishing life.

  1. 17 HR AGO

    Mindfulness in Action: Letting Go of “Should”

    In this Mindfulness in Action episode, I’m talking about one of the sneakiest forms of distorted thinking: shoulds. You know the ones: I should be doing more. I should have this figured out by now. I should be more disciplined, more patient, more productive. These thoughts can sound helpful on the surface, but often they leave us feeling ashamed, guilty, disconnected, and never quite enough. In this episode, I break down three common types of “shoulds”:  the outward-facing shoulds tied to habits and expectations,  the shoulds that come from a lack of self-acceptance,  and the shoulds rooted in unrealistic standards for ourselves or other people. I also share practical mindfulness tools you can use in real time to work with these thoughts instead of getting hooked by them. We explore practices like labeling, cognitive diffusion, acceptance, self-compassion, psychological distancing, and grounding in the present moment. This is not about getting rid of every self-critical thought forever. It’s about learning how to notice them, soften their grip, and come back to what’s actually here. If you’ve been feeling pressured by your own inner voice lately, this episode is a reminder that you are not alone. There are skillful, compassionate ways to meet yourself in those moments. Other meditations: - Slowing Down the Rush - How to Regulate Your Emotions for Resilience and Performance - How to Combat Self-Criticism -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    24 min

  2. 16 APR

    Decision Fatigue, Perfectionism, and the Problem With “Should”

    Ever catch yourself thinking, “I should be better than this. I should be doing more. I should have started earlier” and then spiraling? In this solo episode, I’m diving into the world of "should" and how it quietly drives guilt, shame, and burnout, especially for high performers and ambitious, growth-oriented people. Recently, I injured my rib at my son’s ninja gym birthday party and being forced to pull back on training actually gave me surprising mental relief. So today, I explore why having more ways to train, work, parent, or “optimize” yourself can actually make you feel worse about whatever you choose. Drawing from my background in applied positive psychology and the science of cognitive behavioral therapy, I break down: - The three main categories of “shoulds” - How thinking traps like catastrophizing, personalizing, and overgeneralizing feed the “should” spiral - The difference between neurotic obligations and values-based aspirations - Practical ways to notice your “shoulds,” question the beliefs underneath them - How to decide when to either turn them into concrete, values-aligned plans, or consciously let them go. If you’ve ever felt haunted by the feeling that you’re not doing enough or not far enough along, this episode will help you build awareness, create kinder inner language, and reclaim your energy from unhelpful “shoulds” so you can focus on what truly matters to you. LINKS Episode with Ethan Kross on Chatter James Clear's Atomic Habits Episode with Katy Milkman on How to Change Is self care stressing you out? Solo reflection -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    35 min

  3. 9 APR

    What Flow Really Is: Mindfulness, Self-Trust, and the Challenge-Skill Balance with Dr. Sue Jackson

    Flow is one of those words that gets used all the time, but what does it actually mean? And more importantly, how do we create more of it in real life, not just in elite sport or peak performance moments? In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Sue Jackson, one of the world’s leading experts on flow, to talk about what flow really is, how challenge-skill balance works, and why mindfulness, self-efficacy, and trust in your own abilities matter so much in creating these deeply absorbing and meaningful states. We also get into how risk perception shapes flow, why self-consciousness can pull us out of it, and whether neurodivergent hyperfocus is the same thing as flow, or something different. This conversation felt especially relevant to me because I’ve been exploring the overlap between flow, self-transcendent experiences, mindfulness in action, and those moments when you’re fully immersed in something challenging and alive. We talk about sport, yes—but also parenting, presentations, reading research, fatigue, difficult days, and how to work with your attention when life is messy and real. Top 5 Takeaways Flow is not just “being in the zone” Mindfulness supports flowSelf-efficacy mattersRisk is partly about perceptionHyperfocus and flow are not the same thing-------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    58 min

  4. 26 MAR

    Mindfulness in Action: Redefining What It Means to Get Better

    In this Mindfulness in Action episode, I’m recording on a trail run and thinking out loud about something I’ve been re-examining in my own life: the pressure to constantly optimize and get better. We hear it everywhere: be more productive, improve every day, maximize your time. And while growth and striving for excellence matter, I’ve been noticing how easily that mindset turns into pressure, guilt, and a constant feeling of not doing enough. In this episode, I share how I’ve been unlearning that pattern, what it actually means to “strive well,” and why doing less can sometimes lead to better performance, creativity, and well-being. I also guide you through a simple mindfulness practice you can do while moving to help you notice: Where you’re putting pressure on yourselfThe inner voice telling you to do moreHow to reconnect with contentment in the middle of effortThe goal isn’t to stop growing, it’s to redefine what getting better actually looks like. If you’ve been feeling stuck in the cycle of always needing to do more, this one’s for you. Other meditations: - Slowing Down the Rush - How to Regulate Your Emotions for Resilience and Performance - How to Combat Self-Criticism -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    20 min

  5. 19 MAR

    How to Say What You Mean with Oren Jay Sofer | REPLAY

    Sometimes it's hard to say what you mean. Oren Jay Sofer says, "Communication is a learnable skill and it’s one of the most powerful levers for making change in your life and the world." Non-violent communication is about taking responsibility for what we are experiencing using empathy, deep listening, know how to make requests. // This episode is a replay from the Sonya Looney Show. It originally aired October 22, 2020. // Author and renowned meditation instructor Oren Jay Sofer regularly teaches a mindful approach to non-violent communication. spent two and a half years of living as an Anagarika (renunciate) at branch monasteries in the Ajahn Chah Thai Forest lineage. Today, his teaching combines classical Buddhist training with the accessible language of secular mindfulness.  Since the early 2000s, Oren has had a deep interest in the relationship between contemplative practice and communication. A graduate of the BayNVC North American Leadership Training, he has taught classes and workshops in Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication (NVC) nationally since 2006. His innovative retreats and online programs in Mindful Communication offer one of the only opportunities in the U.S today to explore the intersection between formal meditation practice, Right Speech and NVC.  Oren  is the founder and Guiding Teacher of Next Step Dharma, an innovative online course focused on bringing the tools of meditation to daily life, and co-founder of Mindful Healthcare.  Oren has created mindfulness programs for organizations, companies, and apps including Apple, Kaiser Permanente, Lumosity, Calm, 10% Happier, Simple Habit and others. I loved his book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication.  In the book, a main theme is that every thought or feeling is there to try to meet a need.  If you can try to figure out what need your thoughts are tied to, it's easier to articulate what you need to those around you.  It's also useful when listening to someone in a disucssion or conflict to tease out what need they are trying to have met.  I also enjoyed learning about conflict and viewing it as a way to deepen relationships. I also learned that non-violent communication and conflict resolution isn't necessarily to try to get someone to do things your way, it's about deepening understanding of one another because sometimes we simply can't agree to have the same viewpoint.   Non-violent communication has a framework of observation, the feeling, the needs and values to be met, and the request. Three questions you can ask yourself are what happened, how do I feel about it, and why? I also loved learning about how to use mindfulness in listening and communication as well as how to ground yourself in your own body when tensions rise. Topics Discussed in the Podcast  from childhood actor to meditation instructor4 types of conflict avoidanceself-empathytools for internal pressureNo mud, no lotusaddressing the voiceless and gender constructshow to make requests of others Resources Oren Jay Sofer's websiteGet Oren's book: Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    58 min

  6. 12 MAR

    How to Move from Survival Mode to Thriving: Jon Rosemberg on Agency, Stress, and Success

    What if the version of “success” you’ve been chasing is actually keeping you stuck in survival mode? In this episode, I sit down with author and coach Jon Rosemberg to talk about what it really means to move from high-functioning survival into genuine thriving. Jon shares his deeply personal story of growing up in Caracas, Venezuela, living in chronic vigilance, and eventually discovering that achievement and productivity were not the same thing as peace, agency, or well-being. This conversation hit me on a very personal level. So much of what Jon shares mirrors my own journey of questioning performance-based definitions of success, asking whether external accomplishments actually create the feeling I’m looking for, and realizing that thriving often has much more to do with connection, meaning, and agency than with metrics. We talk about the body’s role in helping us recognize survival mode, how to challenge the beliefs that keep us trapped in proving and performing, and Jon’s practical AIR framework: Awareness, Inquiry, and Reframing. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing all the “right” things but still feel off, disconnected, or chronically on edge, this conversation is for you. Here’s what you’ll learn: Thriving is not the same as successSurvival mode can look high-functioningSomatic awareness mattersAgency can be practicedConnection is essential to thrivingLINKS Follow Jon on Instagram Visit Jon's website to learn more about his book Meaningful Work with Tamara Myles and Wes Adams Defining and Feeling Success  -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    1hr 4min

  7. 26 FEB

    Aging as a Female Endurance Athlete: Perimenopause, Strength Training & Adapting with Jenny Smith

    I’ve known Jenny Smith since the early 2000s, back when I was a brand-new pro mountain biker watching her absolutely dominate at Nationals. She’s been a mentor, a competitor, a mom who kept racing when that wasn’t common, and someone I’ve always admired for her longevity in sport. In this episode, Jenny and I talk honestly about aging as female endurance athletes, especially navigating perimenopause, hormone changes, recovery shifts, strength training, anxiety, inflammation, and evolving expectations. We discuss how training needs to change as estrogen fluctuates and why strength training becomes even more important for bone health, metabolic health, and performance. Jenny shares the reality of needing more recovery, setting goals that reflect your life stage and responsibilities, and how to embrace aging with flexibility, wisdom, and self-compassion instead of fear. Plus, we cover hormone replacement therapy and getting medical support. This conversation is for women who love endurance sport and want to keep performing, not by pretending nothing is changing, but by adapting. Aging doesn’t mean decline, it can mean agency. Here’s what you’ll learn: Perimenopause changes training needsStrength training is non-negotiable for aging athletesRecovery matters more than everGoal setting must evolve with life stageAging brings wisdom and agency LINKS Follow Jenny Smith Coaching Learn more about Aim High Performance Authenticity and managing pressure with Sarah Sturm Aging athletes with Joel Friel How women should train differently with Dr. Stacy Simms -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    54 min

  8. 19 FEB

    How to Be a Better Communicator: The OARS Framework from Motivational Interviewing

    The most valuable skill I’ve ever learned isn’t about performance, mindset, or even resilience. It’s communication. In this solo episode, I’m teaching you one of the most powerful tools I use as a coach, mentor, professor at the University of Pennsylvania, keynote speaker, parent, and partner. It comes from motivational interviewing and it’s called OARS: Open-ended questions, Affirmations, Reflective listening, and Summarizing. These skills have completely changed how I show up in conversations. They’ve made me a better coach, teacher, partner, mom, and human. Motivational interviewing is a client-centered communication approach designed to guide people toward what matters most to them. Instead of telling someone what to do (which often undermines autonomy and competence), this framework helps people feel heard, understood, and empowered to make their own decisions. In this episode, I walk you through what active listening really means (and why most of us aren’t actually doing it) and how to ask open-ended questions that deepen conversations. I discuss how affirmations and reflective listening builds trust and shared understanding. I also give real-life examples you can use immediately with your partner, your kids, your team at work, or your friends. And yes, we talk about AI. Because as AI handles more intellectual tasks, our human communication skills will matter even more. If you want stronger relationships, better conflict management, and deeper connection in your personal and professional life, this episode gives you one skill to practice today.  Top 5 Takeaways: Communication is a partnership, not a directiveOpen-ended questions deepen conversationsReflective listening builds trustAffirmations reinforce strengths and valuesIn an AI-driven world, human communication skills are a competitive advantage LINKS - Learn about meditation from Oren Jay Sofer - Episode on how to be a better communicator -------------- The Grow the Good Podcast is produced by Palm Tree Pod Co.

    17 min
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Trailer

4.7
out of 5
21 Ratings

About

Grow the Good, formerly The Sonya Looney Show, is your guide to continual personal growth, meaningful connections, and positive impact in the world. Challenge the idea that you are broken or need fixing. Instead, discover how to cultivate the good that already exists within you and amplify the strengths and potential you may not yet realize you have. Grounded in the science of positive psychology and guided by the pillars of purpose, vitality, resilience, hope, and connection, each episode is packed with tools, stories, and evidence-backed insights to help you create a more authentic and flourishing life.

Information

  • Creator
    Sonya Looney
  • Years Active
    2017 - 2026
  • Episodes
    461
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Grow the Good
  • Show Website
    Grow the Good

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