The Selfish Woman

Valerie Jones
  • 4.9 (29)
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Selfish is the key that unlocks the dungeon. This is feminism for the woman who's been in the trenches of life for decades. The kind that comes from surviving marriages, rebuilds, and decades of following rules that were never heard. The confession booth for women who are done being good. Ranked #23 in Feedspot's Top 80 Badass Female Podcasts of 2026

  1. MAR 23

    Stress Is Not The Problem...This Is: With Dr. Rachel Goldman

    We've all been there: a plan falls apart, a deadline shifts, or a minor inconvenience feels like the end of the world. Or, we spend way too much of our time and energy worrying about 'what if.' We usually blame the situation for how we feel, but today's guest says the 'problem' isn't what's happening - it's how we're wired to react to it.  I'm joined by Dr. Rachel Goldman, a clinical psychologist, NYU professor, and a leading expert in the mind-body connection who has shared her insights alongside icons like Oprah and Mel Robbins.  Ahead of the April launch of her highly anticipated book, "When Life Happens," Dr. Rachel breaks down the science of CBT and explains why we need to stop trying to 'delete' stress and start building a Coping Toolbox.  This episode is a survival guide for anyone who feels overwhelmed by the weight of 'doing it all' and is ready to reclaim their peace of mind.  What We Discuss:  The Stress Reframe: Why stress is inevitable, but our physiological and mental reaction to it is a choice.  The "All or Nothing" Trap: How to break the cycle of perfectionism when things go sideways.  Building Your Coping Toolbox: Specific strategies to regulate your emotions in real time.  Mindset as a Skill: Why resilience isn't a personality trait - it's a strategy you can train.  When Life Happens: A deep dive into the mindset shifts needed to navigate life's messiest moments.  Resources & Links:  Pre-Order the Book  Follow Dr. Rachel  Subscribe to The Selfish Woman Podcast on Spotify  Subscribe to The Selfish Woman Podcast on Apple

    42 min

  2. MAR 16

    The Wrong Life: Ep. 130

    I left Spain to figure out what was wrong with me.  I had the dream life. The cobblestone streets. The European light. The copper bathtub imported from England that cost eleven thousand euros.  And I was miserable in ways I didn't have words for yet.  So I left. Convinced I was the problem.  I was wrong.  In this episode I'm recording from Harrison Hot Springs - sitting in a mineral pool, in the middle of a meditation that turned into a download - and I finally understand what I was actually running from. And why leaving was the most sane thing I ever did.  This is the episode for the woman who has spent years trying to fix herself. The woman who has read the books, done the work, followed the rules - and still feels like something is fundamentally broken.  Nothing is broken.  But something is wrong.  And until you figure out what that is, you will keep building beautiful lives on foundations that cannot hold you.  This is where we start.  Join The Phoenix  Get the book

    26 min

  3. MAR 2

    You Didn't End Up Here by Accident: Numerology, Patterns & Your Life Path with Ann Perry

    What if your life isn't random?  In this episode, I sit down with numerologist Ann Perry to break down what your numbers reveal about you, and how they shape your relationships, your patterns, and the way you move through the world.  We also dive into:  What if your soul chose this life?  What if the challenges you've faced weren't random...but selected?  And how do you hold that idea without dismissing real pain or turning it into toxic positivity?    What You'll Learn:  What numerology is, and why it works  How your numbers influence your identity and decision-making  Why you keep repeating the sane relationship dynamics  How to better understand your kids, partner and coworkers  The controversial idea that your soul chose this life (and what that really means)  How to stop overthinking and start trusting yourself  Links:  Ann Perry's website: https://www.annperrynumerologist.com   Ann's book: https://amzn.to/4icbFsq   Watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/nwkCP4v_atI?si=QjWGaBPy7zNER2jy     And if you're ready to stop overthinking and step over the edge and into your next level.... Join The Phoenix: subscribepage.io/4M2VOU

    33 min

  4. FEB 23

    Why You Keep Overthinking (And What You're Actually Avoiding)

    Why do you keep overthinking decisions when you already know what to do?  In this episode I break down why overthinking isn't a clarity problem, it's a self-trust problem - and what you're actually avoiding.  What you'll learn:  Why you say "I don't know" (and what it really means)  The hidden reason you stay stuck in indecision  How overthinking protects you from uncomfortable truth  The identity shift that changes everything  One simple question to stop overthinking immediately  Key moment from the episode:  "You don't say 'I don't know' because you're confused. You say it because the truth would cost you something."  If you're ready to stop overthinking and actually move forward, this is exactly what we do inside The Breakthrough.  Email me:  valerie@valeriejonescoach.com and tell me the one thing you want a breakthrough in.  Leave a review on Spotify  Leave a review on Apple  Subscribe to the show!  Watch on YouTube  Get my book

    21 min

  5. FEB 15

    From Netflix's 'Sex, Love & goop' to Erotic Wholeness: Darshana Avila on Asking For What You Want

    Darshana Avila left her corporate career and her marriage, and stepped into a life of erotic wholeness.  Now she's a Certified Somatic Experiencing Practitioner & Sexological Bodyworker featured on Netflix's Sex, Love & goop with Gwyneth Paltrow - and she's here to talk about what most of us are too afraid to ask for.  In this episode, we talk about:  Knowing what you want (in sex and in life) and actually asking for it: Why high-achieving women can run companies but can't speak their desires in bed.  The identity crisis that led to liberation: How Darshana walked away from everything that wasn't aligned - and what happened next.  Her experience on Netflix's Sex, Love & goop: Working with a lesbian couple to help them understand what they want, need, and hw to speak it out loud.  Erotic wholeness as a path to power: How reclaiing pleasure is an act of rebellion (and sovereignty)  People-pleasing in the bedroom (and eveywhere else): Why saying yes when you mean no kills intimacy, and how to stop.  This conversation is raw, real and permission-giving. If you've ever felt disconnected from your body, your desires, or your power, this one's for you.  Connect with Darshana:  Website Want more? Subscribe to The Selfish Woman Podcast (ranked top 3% globally) for weekly conversations about identity, power and building empires on your terms.  New episodes every Monday. Named Feedspots #23 in the Top 80 Best Badass Female Podcasts of 2026  Take the Reveal Your Mask Quiz  Please leave a review! It help more women find us.

    52 min

  6. FEB 9

    From Selfish to Sovereign

    In this episode I reveal the next level of your journey - from midlife reinvention to full-blown feminine sovereignty. If you're a woman ready to rise into your power, lead with vision, and claim a life that reflects your true worth, this is for you.  I unpack the Queen Code (my brand new methodology), share the mythic framework behind the Sovereign Woman, and invite you inside the symbolic castle that holds it all.  Consider this your rite of passage.  Join The Phoenix  Subscribe to my YouTube channel  Get my book, The Selfish Year  Follow me on Instagram  Subscribe, share and leave a review!

    26 min

  7. FEB 2

    The Cost of Quiet with Colette Jane Fehr

    You've been swallowing your truth, avoiding conflict, and hoping things will change if you're just patient enough.  But your silence isn't safety....it's a slow death.  This week, I'm talking with Colette Jane Fehr, author of The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations That Create Secure, Lasting Love, about why we stay silent, and what it costs us.  In this episode:  Why it's so hard to speak up (even when you know you should)  What to do when you get the same response every time you speak up  The curse of the good girl (and how it keeps you quiet)  How to get out of the Cave of Resentment  Self-connected communication: the framework that changes everything  The only way to build confidence (it's not what you think)  Your communication report card (we all have one!)  How conflict is the doorway to intimacy, not the end of it  Colette is giving us the tools to stop performing and start speaking.  Because the cost of quiet? It's your life.  Pre-order The Cost of Quiet here Follow Collete on Instagram  My Substack article, and free quiz: Reveal Your Mask

    50 min

  8. JAN 26

    Selfish is the Strategy: A New Era Begins

    Welcome to Season Five - and to 2026!  In this powerful kickoff episode, Valerie pulls back the curtain on what it really means to be selfish in a world that has taught women to disappear. This isn't just a refresher course. It's a full-on reintroduction to the philosophy, fire, and unapologetic truth at the core of The Selfish Woman movement.  You'll hear:  Why 'selfish' is still the most radical word a woman can claim  What the old Good Girl contract cost you, and how to burn it for good  Why every powerful woman you admire had to get selfish  How to give from overflow, not obligation  What's coming in 2026: bold new tools, mythic framewords, and sacred strategies no on else is teaching  If you're ready to make 2026 the year you come home to yourself, start here.  Get The Selfish Year  Subscribe to the YouTube series  Follow on Instagram  Get my blog, The Selfish Gospel  Go forth and be selfish.

    19 min
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4.9
out of 5
29 Ratings

About

Selfish is the key that unlocks the dungeon. This is feminism for the woman who's been in the trenches of life for decades. The kind that comes from surviving marriages, rebuilds, and decades of following rules that were never heard. The confession booth for women who are done being good. Ranked #23 in Feedspot's Top 80 Badass Female Podcasts of 2026

Information

  • Creator
    Valerie Jones
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    141
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Show Website
    The Selfish Woman

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