Brain First Parenting with Eileen Devine

Eileen Devine
  • 5.0 (59)
  • PARENTING
  • UPDATED BIWEEKLY

The Brain First Parenting podcast supports parents who are raising children, teens or young adults with brain-based differences and challenging behavioral symptoms. We are a safe space for parents who have historically felt like there isn't a place for them in the parenting advice world. At Brain First Parenting, we see each child as a unique individual with a unique brain, who deserves accommodations to thrive in a world that is frequently not set up for people with neurobehavioral challenges. We prioritize supporting the parents of these kids and teens so that they can, in turn, feel hope and confidence and joy in their parenting experience.

  1. SEP 22

    Ep. 25 | Parenting with Awareness: 3 Essential Ingredients for Attuned Parenting w/ Wendy Sue Horn

    SUMMARY - This episode is with guest Wendy Sue Horn, a master clinician, who has been treating individuals of all ages for over 20 years, including supporting parents. Wendy Sue is also an EMDRIA-approved consultant trainer in EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), a trauma-informed psychotherapy that helps individuals heal from the symptoms and emotional distress of disturbing life experiences. Listen in as Eileen talks with Wendy Sue about what she describes as the three essential ingredients parents need in order to attune to their child. TAKEAWAYS: We don't come into parenthood as blank slates and our history follows us into our own parenting and relationship with our kids. Once we understand how and why this happens, it helps us (parents) make sense of our experience with a non-shaming lens.Attunement is the parent's ability to "tune in" to their child's internal, emotional experience.The parental goal is not to prevent pain for their child because this is not possible, but instead is to provide accompaniment in their pain because this is when it is less lonely, there is less suffering, and the child's resilience can shine through.There are three ingredients required for parents to attune to their child: motivation, awareness, and resources.The parent's ability to recognizing when fear is the motivation behind their behavior is essential because fear, by nature, moves the attention away from their child's experience, leaving them unable to attune to them.A parent's history of attachment and adverse experiences "show up" in the relationship with their child, which can impact the internal resources a parent has access to and may require supports to build the internal resources and resilience.Ways that EMDR therapy (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can support parents who have kids with challenging behavioral symptoms. RESOURCES: Wendy Sue Horn - EMDR Resource Center ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    48 min

  2. SEP 8

    Ep. 24 | Slow Processing: When "Not Listening" Is Really "Needing Time"

    SUMMARY - It is common for kids with neurobehavioral conditions to struggle with slow processing pace. Slow processing pace is a cognitive skill that is often missed or misunderstood, seen as a behavioral issue, and therefore not accommodated. This episode helps listeners better understand and identify slow processing pace as a lagging cognitive skill, and from there, provides concrete examples of accommodations. TAKEAWAYS: Slow processing pace is a cognitive skill set that everyone needs to have firmly in place to navigate their day successfully.Processing pace is the speed at which someone can process information, especially verbal information.There are behaviors that reflect slower processing pace which parents, caregivers and adults need to be aware of in order to be able to then accommodate this lagging cognitive skill vs punish the behavioral symptom.Accommodations take into consideration the additional time that kids with neurobehavioral conditions require to navigate their day successfully. RESOURCES: Recording of Free Workshop: 10-Second Child in a One-Second World: Slow Processing Pace and How to Support It Brain First Parenting Podcast, Episode 15: Why "Simple" Conversations Are Hard For Your Child Blog Post: 'The 10-Second Child in a One-Second World' - Slower Processing Pace and 4 Ways to Support It ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    23 min

  3. AUG 25

    Ep. 23 | Five Mantras to Keep You in a Brain First Mindset

    SUMMARY - This episode focuses in on five mantras that will help parents of kids with brain-based differences and challenging behaviors stay in a Brain First mindset. TAKEAWAYS: One point of "growing pains" parents of kids with neurobehavioral challenges experience is how to react in productive ways, from a Brain First lens, when they are faced with their child's challenging behaviors.When we have mantras "in our back pocket" that resonate with us in a way that helps slow down our visceral reaction so we can decide how to respond in that moment, it helps us access our thinking brain so we can respond in ways we truly desire.The infographic linked below as 15 mantras for parents to "try on" to see which one resonates! Download at the link below. RESOURCES: Free Infographic: Helpful Mantras For Staying in a Brain First Parenting Mindset ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    15 min

  4. AUG 11

    Ep. 22 | The Unique Grief Affecting Parents of Neurodivergent Kids

    SUMMARY - There is a universal grief that affects parents of neurodivergent kids that often goes unrecognized, leaving parents feeling alone in a difficult emotional experience. This episode takes listeners through what this unique grief looks like and why it's so unique to parents of neurodivergent kids and how to begin to move through it so healing can begin. TAKEAWAYS: Grief, while such a common experience for parents of neurodivergent kids, is often unacknowledged, which leads to additional suffering for parents. This is why it's so important to talk about it.Grief is defined by Dr. Brene Brown in three ways: loss, longing, and feeling lostGrief can show up for parents in many ways, like feelings of resentment, guilt, self-judgement or jealousyIt is an understandable that for many parents, they try to keep grief at arms length because of the darkness it can bring.Disenfranchised grief is grief that is unrecognized and unacknowledged by society and is the type of grief many parents experience making it even more difficult to healThere are steps parents can take so that they do not get stuck in their feelings of grief, but instead can move through it and begin to heal RESOURCES: Blog post: Grappling with Grief The Resilience Room Membership Community ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    27 min

  5. JUL 28

    Ep. 21 | Why Your Child Melts Down: The Hidden Impact of Cognitive Fatigue

    SUMMARY - Kids who have brains that work differently, have brains that are working hard all day long, resulting in cognitive fatigue or this empty fuel tank. Their cognitive fatigue is reflected through challenging behaviors. This episode helps listeners identify cognitive fatigue in kids with brain-based differences and what the adults supporting them can do to help their brain rest and recover, resulting in less challenging behaviors. TAKEAWAYS: Every task or expectation we are faced with each day takes a bit of our "cognitive fuel" in order to make it through the day successfully.Individuals with brains that work differently end up on "empty" more quickly and more often, resulting in challenging behavioral symptoms.Brains that are working harder (which are brains that work differently) need more support throughout the day in the way of fuel (food/calories) and rest.There are some common scenarios that result in cognitive fatigue more frequently than others.There are some common accommodations that, when put in place proactively, can help preserve a child's "cognitive fuel" and prevent challenging behaviors. RESOURCES: FREE "Running on Empty" Infographic (for download) Blog post: Running on Empty: Understanding your child's cognitive fuel tank The Resilience Room Community ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    23 min

  6. JUL 14

    Ep. 20 | When Should I Disclose My Child's Diagnosis?

    SUMMARY - This podcast helps parents think through the personal and sometimes difficult question of when they should share their child's diagnosis with others. TAKEAWAYS: There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to making decisions about when to disclose to others about your child's diagnosis or brain-based differenceWhile it is important to consider what the impact will be if you do decide to disclose, it is even more important to consider the possible negative impact of not disclosing.When people who hold the power in various environments are missing information about your child's brain-based differences and their need for accommodations, your child is at high risk for being misunderstood and punished for their disability.Disclosure (when and why) also applies to family members (siblings, extended family, etc.).Disclosure is also important to consider in relation to your child understanding themselves. If they don't have information about their brain-based differences, they are left to jump to their own conclusions which are often negative in nature, impacting self-esteem and mental health. RESOURCES: Blog Post - Disclosure: A Path to Understanding ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    21 min

  7. JUN 30

    Ep. 19 | Rethinking What It Means to Be Resilient

    SUMMARY - This podcast dives into what resilience is and why it's essential for parents of kids with challenging behavioral symptoms to not only understand what it is, but steps they can take to build it each day. TAKEAWAYS: It is imperative as parents of complex kids with intense needs that you understand what it is and how to build it each day.Resilience is what allows us to move through difficult emotions like grief, sadness, and resentment.Resilience is something we all have access to, something we can cultivate within us each day."Grit" or "soldiering on" chips away at resilience over timeHonoring your response to the situation at hand and offering yourself self-compassion builds resilienceGetting support, one-to-one or through community is essential for building resilience, especially when experiencing compassion fatigue and caregiver burnout.Ways to build resilience: find your "people" (be in community), practice self-compassion, move your body, breath work RESOURCES: The Resilience Room Membership CommunityFREE (downloadable) Weekly Plan for Nervous System CareReconsidering What It Means to Be Resilient (blog post)Kristin Neff: Self-compassion resources ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    17 min

  8. JUN 16

    Ep. 18 | Five Misconceptions About The Brain First Approach

    SUMMARY - In this episode, Eileen addresses 5 common misconceptions parents and providers have about what it means to parent and support kids from a Brain First lens. TAKEAWAYS: Here are the 5 misconceptions that Eileen addresses in this episode. With each misconception, she breaks down why it is a misconception and helps listeners deepen their understanding even further about what it means to parent from a Brain First lens. Misconception 1: "Parenting from a Brain First lens means I am allowing or giving in to behavior that is definitely not okay." Misconception 2: "If I parent my child through a Brain First lens, they will never learn how to live in the 'real' world." Misconception 3: "If I parent from child from a Brain First lens, then I am saying I no longer have expectations for them or their behavior." Misconception 4: "If I do not show my child that I am in charge by addressing behavior immediately, I will lose my parental authority and my child will believe they can walk over me and do whatever they want." Misconception 5: "Parenting from a Brain First lens sounds like a lot of work and I am already exhausted. I can not add another thing to my plate." RESOURCES: Blog: Moving Forward by Circling Back Brain First Parenting Podcast Episode 9: Let Go of the Fear That You Are Over-Accommodating ======================= If you appreciated this episode, and would like to receive a weekly note from Eileen about the Brain First Parenting journey every Monday, you can subscribe to her free newsletter HERE! You can also check out all the FREE resources Eileen offers for parents, and learn more about all things Brain First at her website: eileendevine.com And of course, find and follow Eileen on social media: Facebook Instagram Pinterest

    22 min
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The Brain First Parenting podcast supports parents who are raising children, teens or young adults with brain-based differences and challenging behavioral symptoms. We are a safe space for parents who have historically felt like there isn't a place for them in the parenting advice world. At Brain First Parenting, we see each child as a unique individual with a unique brain, who deserves accommodations to thrive in a world that is frequently not set up for people with neurobehavioral challenges. We prioritize supporting the parents of these kids and teens so that they can, in turn, feel hope and confidence and joy in their parenting experience.

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