Dear Divorce Diary: A Fresh Approach To Healing Grief & Building A Life Of Confidence After Divorce

My Coach Dawn
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  • Mental Health
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This isn’t a breakup pep talk. It’s a full-body recalibration for women navigating life after divorce. Dear Divorce Diary is a podcast for women dealing with grief, loneliness, anxiety, anxious or avoidant attachment, and identity loss after divorce — especially when quick fixes, positivity, and spiritual fluff no longer work. I’m Dawn Wiggins, therapist, coach, and homeopath, and this show goes where most divorce advice won’t: into your nervous system, your unspoken grief, your buried rage, and the parts of you that shut down just to survive. Through honest conversation, somatic tools, EMDR- and IFS-informed work, and nervous-system support, each episode helps you feel instead of perform healing — and rebuild safety, confidence, and self-trust from the inside out. You’ll hear raw solo episodes, real voice notes from women in the trenches, and intimate conversations with experts who don’t just talk about healing — they embody it. If you’re tired of being told to “move on” while your body is still bracing, this podcast is your place to land. Your nervous system already knows the truth — it just needs a space that can hold it.

  1. 16h ago

    377. Why Your Nervous System Resists the Life You Want After Divorce

    You can know exactly what you need to do next—and still feel every part of you screaming, nope. Set the boundary. Ask for help. Leave the relationship. Start dating differently. Choose yourself. Let someone really see you. Take the next step in your healing. Why can the thing that might actually change your life feel so threatening? Because your nervous system doesn’t automatically choose what’s best for you. It often chooses what it already knows how to survive. In this episode, Dawn and Joy talk about why familiar pain can feel safer than unfamiliar possibility after divorce—and how the same patterns that kept you stuck inside your marriage can quietly follow you into your healing. We talk about self-prioritizing when you’ve spent decades managing everyone else, the difference between intuition and nervous-system alarm, why denial and avoidance can feel so compelling, and what happens when your protective parts start talking you out of the very life you’ve been praying for. We also get into one of the hardest parts of real healing: allowing yourself to be witnessed. Because sometimes the next breakthrough isn’t about finding another thing to do by yourself. It’s about letting someone see the pattern you can’t see from inside it. If you’ve been wondering, Why do I keep pulling away from the thing I know I want?—this conversation is for you. Inside this episode: Why prioritizing yourself can register as danger after years of codependencyHow familiar pain becomes confused with safetyWhy anxiety can masquerade as intuitionThe protector parts that show up when change starts getting realHow denial and avoidance keep us from facing uncertaintyWhy you may have to move before you actually feel readyHow community helps you recognize patterns you can’t see aloneIf you’re recognizing yourself in this episode—if you know what you want, but keep finding reasons to wait, pull back, or convince yourself you should be able to do this alone—this may be the moment to stop trying to outthink the pattern. Enrollment for A Different D Word is open now through September 20th. This is our 12-month healing program for women who are ready to stop circling the same pain and finally have the support, tools, community, and deeper healing work in one place. If you’ve been wondering whether it’s the right next step for you, book a call with Dawn. We’ll slow it down, talk about what’s actually happening in your life, and figure out together whether the program is a fit. Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  2. 5d ago ·  Bonus

    Ep. 376 Softening What Divorce Grief Has Hardened in You: A Yoga Nidra Practice

    Divorce grief can harden you in ways you don’t always notice. You brace more. You anticipate more. You hold tighter. You get really good at pushing through. Sometimes that hardness was necessary. It helped you survive what was happening. But eventually, the armor that protected you can start making it harder to feel safe enough to soften again. This week’s Cocoon VIP is a gentle yoga practice followed by Yoga Nidra designed around that exact idea: softening what divorce and grief have hardened in you. During the Nidra, you’ll work with the image of a rock resting in a flowing river. The water doesn’t force the rock to change. It simply keeps moving around it, slowly softening the sharp edges and carrying away what is ready to go. Old stories. Old identities. The weight of past relationships. The ways you learned to protect yourself that may not fit anymore. There’s nothing here you need to figure out or fix. You’ll move your body, settle your nervous system, and then give yourself space to notice what happens when you stop gripping quite so hard. Grab your mat, a blanket, pillows, warm socks, and anything else that helps your body feel supported. Then come let the river do some of the work. Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  3. Sep 1

    375. Good News and Bad News About Why You Can’t Let Go After Divorce (Pt. 2)

    You’re doing the therapy. You’re listening to the podcasts. You understand your attachment style. You’ve journaled, processed, learned the language, set the boundaries, and tried really f*****g hard to move on. So why do you still feel stuck? In Part 1, we started asking a different question: Is your healing plan actually big enough for what you’re carrying? Today, we finish the checklist. Because sometimes the problem isn’t that you’re resistant to healing. It’s that you don’t have the right tool for the wound. Or the person helping you doesn’t have the skill set required for where you’re trying to go. Or you’ve been measuring your healing by whether you ever get triggered instead of looking at the trajectory of your life. Are you recovering from triggers faster? Ruminating less? Trusting yourself more? Needing less closure, reassurance, or validation from your ex? Are your boundaries easier to hold? Is your life gradually becoming bigger than your divorce? And then we get to the question that might be the biggest gut punch of this entire two-part series: What is it costing you to stay under-resourced? Your sleep? Your health? Your energy? Your work? Your friendships? Your relationship with your children? Years spent emotionally attached to someone who is no longer building a life with you? There is a cost to getting the right support. But there is also a cost to continuing without enough of it. By the end of this episode, we want you to be able to zoom all the way out and compare two things: How big is the wound? And how big is the support? Because if you’re carrying three gunshot wounds, the cute little Band-Aids aren’t the problem. They were just never big enough for the job. If this episode helps you realize that your burdens currently feel bigger than your solutions, scroll down and fill out the interest form for A Different D Word. Doors close September 20. Download the Healing Checklist Here! Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  4. Aug 25

    373. Good News and Bad News About Why You Can’t Let Go After Divorce (Pt. 1)

    You’re tired of healing. You’ve listened to the podcasts. You understand your attachment style. You know about boundaries and nervous system regulation. Maybe you’ve done therapy, read the books, journaled, meditated—and you’re still wondering why you can’t just let go and move on. Here’s the good news: letting go may not actually be the problem. The bad news? You may be carrying a hell of a lot more than you realized—and the support you have may not be big enough for all of it. In Part 1 of this two-part series, we’re helping you take an honest inventory of what you’re actually trying to heal after divorce: grief, betrayal, attachment wounds, identity loss, old trauma, parenting stress, loneliness, nervous system overwhelm—and all the other pieces that get lumped into “Why am I not over this yet?” We’ll help you figure out whether you need more information or help integrating what you already know, whether you’re stable enough for deeper healing work, and whether the dose of support you have actually matches the weight of what you’re carrying. Because maybe you don’t suck at letting go. Maybe you’ve been trying to treat three gunshot wounds with a really cute Welly Band-Aid. And next week in Part 2, we’ll show you how to tell whether the help you’re getting actually matches what you need. Download the Healing Checklist Here! Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  5. Aug 20

    372. The Divorce Money Blocks You Don’t Know You Have: How Loss Changes Your Relationship With Money

    Divorce changes your relationship with a lot of things. Love. Trust. Safety. The future. And sometimes… money. Because money isn’t just money. It can represent security, freedom, worthiness, belonging—and whether or not you believe there will actually be enough. In this VIP re-release, we’re digging into the subconscious money beliefs you may not even realize you’re carrying: scarcity, feeling ineligible for more, inherited beliefs about wealth, and the complicated feelings that can come with allowing yourself to actually have more. We’ll talk about: How “there’s not enough” becomes a deeply ingrained beliefThe family, cultural, and spiritual messages that shape your relationship with moneyWhy part of you may not believe you're eligible for abundanceThe connection between money, identity, belonging, and lossWhy being “realistic” can sometimes keep you from imagining something differentHow to begin noticing and shifting the beliefs underneath your money patternsHuman Design as a tool for understanding how you naturally make decisions and move through the worldA guided practice to begin working with scarcity and your capacity to receiveBecause after experiencing profound loss, it’s worth getting curious about what your mind and body learned from it. Not just about love. But about having, losing, trusting—and believing there can still be more. Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  6. Aug 18

    371. What Are You Still Carrying That Doesn't Belong in Your Life After Divorce?

    There are things you learned to carry because, at one point, you had to. The responsibility. The mental load. Other people's expectations. Keeping everyone okay. Being the strong one. Being the woman who could handle it. But just because you needed that version of yourself then doesn't mean you have to keep being her now. This week, Dawn sits down with Alexis Contos, founder of The Breadwinners, a community redefining what it means to be an ambitious, successful woman—and creating spaces where women can put down the titles, roles, accomplishments and performance long enough to figure out who they actually are. Which, hello. Divorce. Because divorce has a way of forcing you to confront the identities you've accumulated—and decide which ones actually belong in the life you're building now. Dawn and Alexis talk about: What you carry vs. what you bring into your relationships and your lifeThe versions of yourself you never became because you got so good at being this oneWhy divorce can feel like both falling and failing in publicThe friendships, careers and identities we eventually outgrowWhy protecting everyone else can quietly become sacrificing yourselfThe "egg" you're terrified to dropWhat happens when accomplished women stop performing and start telling the truthHow to borrow someone else's belief in you while you're learning to believe in yourselfBecause sometimes the next version of you doesn't need more. She needs you to finally put something down. So what are you still carrying that doesn't belong anymore? Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  7. Aug 13 ·  Bonus

    Ep. 370 Dating After Divorce: The Questions You Need to Ask Before You Get Attached

    Dating after divorce is a whole different world. Dating apps. Men holding fish. Men who apparently have never taken a decent selfie. Threesomes. Ethical non-monogamy. And the occasional man who looks way better in person than his profile would have you believe. But underneath all of the chaos is a much more important question: How do you know who you're actually dealing with before you get attached? With Dawn away, Coach Tiffini and Joy are joined again by Christianna, Kelly, and Jo from our current A Different D Word cohort for a very unfiltered conversation about what it actually looks like to start dating after divorce. And this one goes places. We're talking about the questions women often don't ask soon enough: What was your part in your divorce?What does “I want a long-term relationship” actually mean to you?How do I know you've done the work?Are you actually ready for a relationship—or do you just think you are?How do you talk about your ex?What are you looking for five years from now?Are we monogamous?And how early is too early to start asking the really uncomfortable questions?Plus, Jo shares what it's like to date again after nearly 50 years—and why she's asking about everything from STD testing and meeting the family to sexual boundaries, physical health and, yes… whether the pipes still work. But the biggest conversation isn't really about finding the right man. It's about who you are while you're looking for him. Can you state what you want without shrinking it when someone attractive shows up? Can you hold a boundary and watch what he does instead of getting swept up in what he says? Can you walk away when something doesn't fit instead of convincing yourself you can live with it? Because chemistry can make a lot of things feel negotiable that weren't negotiable five minutes before you met him. Before you swipe right—or get attached to the next person who does—this is the conversation we want you to hear. Ask the hard questions. Have a plan. Stick to it. And don't do it alone. Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

  8. Aug 11

    369. A Year After Divorce: 3 Women Tell Us What It Took to Become Themselves Again

    What does it actually take to become yourself again after divorce? Today, Dawn is away—which means Joy and Coach Tiffini have been left unsupervised. And they invited three women from the current A Different D Word cohort to take over the mic with them. Christianna, Kelly, and Jo came into this year in very different places. One was in free fall after the end of a 30-year marriage. One was already in therapy but felt like she spent every session catching her therapist up instead of actually moving forward. One says she felt like she was physically dying—her hair was falling out, she couldn't sleep, and she'd lost 60 pounds. Nearly a year later, they sat down together to talk about what happened in between. The fear of joining. The money. The resistance to needing other women. The hard work they didn't see coming. The boundaries they learned to set. The relationships that changed. The retreat moments they'll never forget. And the strange, beautiful experience of realizing that somewhere along the way, they had actually started to feel like themselves again. This isn't a polished before-and-after story. It's three women telling the truth about what a year of intentional healing really asked of them—and what became possible when they said yes. And if you're somewhere near the beginning of your own divorce, wondering who you'll be a year from now, you need to hear what they have to say. Because as one of these women puts it: the next 12 months are going to pass either way. The question is who you might meet on the other side. Support the show You can't think your way into healing 🥵 You have to practice your way there 👭If you're ready for the next step, learn more about  A Different D Word and apply here ✨

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This isn’t a breakup pep talk. It’s a full-body recalibration for women navigating life after divorce. Dear Divorce Diary is a podcast for women dealing with grief, loneliness, anxiety, anxious or avoidant attachment, and identity loss after divorce — especially when quick fixes, positivity, and spiritual fluff no longer work. I’m Dawn Wiggins, therapist, coach, and homeopath, and this show goes where most divorce advice won’t: into your nervous system, your unspoken grief, your buried rage, and the parts of you that shut down just to survive. Through honest conversation, somatic tools, EMDR- and IFS-informed work, and nervous-system support, each episode helps you feel instead of perform healing — and rebuild safety, confidence, and self-trust from the inside out. You’ll hear raw solo episodes, real voice notes from women in the trenches, and intimate conversations with experts who don’t just talk about healing — they embody it. If you’re tired of being told to “move on” while your body is still bracing, this podcast is your place to land. Your nervous system already knows the truth — it just needs a space that can hold it.

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