The Stay or Go Podcast for Women Considering Divorce

Britta Jo
  • 4.6 (178)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

Stay or Go is the bold, no-BS space where women on the edge of divorce find clarity, courage, and the unapologetic power to choose their future. stayorgo.substack.com

  1. When Life Takes Us Places We Didn’t Expect: The Hard Truth of Admitting It’s Not Working

    1d ago

    When Life Takes Us Places We Didn’t Expect: The Hard Truth of Admitting It’s Not Working

    Episode 109: Hello, my loves. Welcome back. Today’s episode is a deeply personal, vulnerable, and ultimately liberating one for me. For the past eight months, I have been spinning in a messy internal loop, trying to force a business model that just wasn’t working. Instead of looking at the numbers cleanly, my conditioning told me I just needed to try harder, surrender more, and carry the entire weight of the world on my shoulders. If you are currently considering divorce, this loop probably sounds incredibly familiar. So often, we look inward and blame ourselves for a failing marriage, believing that walking away means we can’t trust our own judgment or that we have failed as the emotional anchors of our families. After a beautifully raw reality check with my coach, Quinn, I finally embraced a truth I want to hand to you today: it is not a sin, it is just data. In this episode, I’m sharing the messy journey behind my major decision to remove the paywall and return the podcast to a completely free, open resource for everyone, permanently. We are diving into the trap of hyper-independence, shedding old conditioning, and learning how to pivot in a rebellious act of self-love. ✨ Paid subscribers, listen in for the exciting details on how your investment is shifting into monthly live coaching and deep-dive resources straight from The Vault! ❤️ Show Notes: The "Click Clack Symphony" Video Substack DM/Contact Page The "Good Guy" Article The Human Design Episode with Deanna The Creation of Patriarchy - Gerda Lerner The Creation of Feminist Consciousness - Gerda Lerner The Light Seers Tarot Deck - Eight of Cups Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe

    1h 34m
  2. The "Sacred Marriage": Why Your Shadow Holds Keys to Your Power with Dani Granaroli

    May 26

    The "Sacred Marriage": Why Your Shadow Holds Keys to Your Power with Dani Granaroli

    Episode 108: We are so often told that self-connection is about positive vibes, daily mantras, and focusing only on the light. But if you have ever hit a wall with traditional manifestation work—if you have found yourself feeling completely stuck despite your best efforts—you already know there is a deeper layer of yourself waiting to be met. This week, I am so excited to introduce you to Dani. We met back in 2024 in a coach training container, and she is hands-down one of the most uniquely grounded, delightful, and artistic coaches I have ever worked with. In my own moments of feeling fractured, Dani is the person who created a space safe enough for my deepest, most hidden parts to finally creep out and be seen. In this episode, we dig into what it actually means to bring together our light and dark parts through what Dani calls the “alchemical marriage of opposites.” She shares her journey from living as a highly dissociated, intellect-driven human to anchoring deeply in her body through myofascial release, the deep mind-mapping of Dr. Robert, and the paradigm-shifting world of Carolyn Elliott’s Existential Kink. What We Dig Into: * The Backdoor Ego Agenda: How we often try to do shadow work with a secret condition (“I’ll look at my darkness, but only if it gives me what I want”), and what happens when we ask: What if this never changes? * The Energy of Resistance: Why it takes so much work to keep parts of ourselves repressed, and how finding approval for your shadow liberates your creative force. * Slowing Down to Titrate: Moving away from treating our bodies like machines and learning how to sit with intense emotions for just 30 seconds at a time. * Parts Work and the Savior Complex: Why every single part of you loves you and has a positive intention—even the messy ones—and how to stop giving until you burn out. * Money as the “Final Boss”: A transparent look at why money, receiving, and worth are the ultimate playgrounds for shadow work. If you are navigating the disorienting, in-between space of considering divorce, or if you are just exhausted from treating your personal growth like a grueling chore, this conversation is a breath of fresh air. It is an invitation to move away from heavy “healing work” and step into deep, soulful play. Show Notes: Connect with Dani: Dani’s Website Dani’s Instagram Dominion Community Penetrate Radio Podcast: Apple Spotify Instagram YouTube iHeart Radio John Barnes Myofascial Release The Light Dark Institute Dr. Robert Dee McDonald Christina Morassi Luis Mojica Carolyn Elliot Connect with Britta: Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe

    1h 27m
  3. Stop Doubting, Start Designing: Become the Authority of Your Life with Human Design and Diana Elizabeth

    May 19

    Stop Doubting, Start Designing: Become the Authority of Your Life with Human Design and Diana Elizabeth

    Episode 107: In this episode, I sit down with Deanna Elizabeth for a conversation about Human Design and the deeper work of self-connection it can open inside us. This is not a conversation about a system of labels or complex data charts. It is a conversation about what happens when you begin to trust that authority may already be living within you. We explore what it looks like to connect with your unique energetic blueprint. To listen for the truths beneath the noise of lifelong conditioning, family expectations, and trauma. And to approach Human Design not as something outside of you, but as a literal X-ray that helps you access what your body, your soul, and your inner voice may already know. At the center of this conversation is a powerful remembering. So many women considering divorce have been taught that truth must come through prescribed channels. That access to safety, to knowing, to authority lives somewhere outside of themselves—in a partner, a family, or a system. But what if the real invitation is to reclaim your own relationship with wisdom? To let your natural strategy, your intuition, and your body become part of the language through which you come home to yourself? Through this conversation, you will hear what it means to look at your design with reverence, curiosity, and openness. You will learn about the precise “monkeys”—the shadow patterns and ancestral distortions—that pull you away from your alignment, and how identifying them gives you the power to choose yourself. Not a way to escape your life, but a way to meet yourself more fully. This episode is not really about Human Design. It is about remembering how to trust your own knowing. ✨ Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Diana’s Website Join us for the Human Design Workshop on Sunday, May 24th, 2026 Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe

    1h 6m
  4. When Husbands Don't "Lose Their Sh*t" During Divorce: A Success Story

    May 12

    When Husbands Don't "Lose Their Sh*t" During Divorce: A Success Story

    Episode 106: In this episode, I sit down with a woman from inside the Stay or Go community whose journey reveals the quiet, physical toll of living a life that only looks good on paper. This is not a story about a high-conflict disaster. It is a story about the “box-checking” trap—the graduation, the career, the marriage, and the home—and the realization that checking every box can still leave you completely empty. We explore what it looks like to finally listen to your own skin. To acknowledge the panic attacks that strike on the commute home and the GI issues that signal a deep internal misalignment. We dig into the grit it takes to build an exit strategy while pregnant, choosing to “be selfish” by investing in your own education and healing so that you—and your children—can eventually breathe. At the center of this conversation is a startlingly beautiful observation of human maturity. The belief so many women carry is that telling the truth will inevitably lead to a “shit show” of aggression and shaming. But through Jaguar’s experience, we see a rare and thrilling alternative. We witness what happens when a husband chooses respect over ego, allowing a marriage to dissolve at a barroom table with a pen, a plan, and a profound sense of grace. Through her story, you will hear what it means to move from performance to presence. The terror of the filing, the vulnerability of the “final blow,” and the liberation of the first two months on the other side. You will hear how her choice didn’t just end a marriage, but birthed a collaborative friendship that actually serves her family. This episode is not about staying or going. It is about the radical act of reclaiming your own exploration and trusting your body when it says it is time to move. ✨ Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe

    1h 13m
  5. Beyond the Betrayal: When the Affair is Not Your Fault

    May 5

    Beyond the Betrayal: When the Affair is Not Your Fault

    Episode 105: This week, I am opening up a conversation that I know is heavy, nuanced, and for many of you, deeply triggering. I’m reopening the topic of affairs, but from a vantage point I haven’t fully explored on this podcast before. To help me navigate this, I’ve brought on a very special guest: my partner, Joe. For a long time, I’ve spoken about affairs through the lens of what Joe describes in this episode as the “Deserted Island”—the experience of a partner so starved for connection and visibility that they reach for water wherever they can find it, even if it’s from a source they never thought they’d touch. But I’ve realized that by focusing there, I left a group of you behind. I left out the ones who were fully invested, who were over-functioning to keep the marriage alive, and who were still blindsided by a partner’s betrayal. In this episode, Joe and I dig into the heart of that wreckage. Joe shares his own raw history of being on both sides of this coin: the one who sought more outside a marriage, and later, the one who had his world leveled by a partner’s infidelity. We discuss the “head game” of blame—that exhausting, frantic ping-pong match our brains play between It’s all their fault and I wasn’t enough. We talk about why we internalize someone else’s choice as a reflection of our own worth, and how that trauma untethers us from our very sense of self. Whether you are currently wading through the mess of a partner’s choice or looking back at the eras of your life that no longer make sense, I want you to hear this: an affair is data, but it is not a definition of your value. You don’t have to carry the responsibility for a promise you didn’t break. You get to stop the spin. You get to come home to yourself.🤍 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Episode 21 - Affairs Part 2: Five Mistakes Husbands Make When They Find Out & What Women Really Want in Relationship (hint, you’ll find it in the ACOTAR series) Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe

    1h 33m
  6. The Values Gap: Why Your Marriage (and Your Life) Feels Hollow

    Apr 28

    The Values Gap: Why Your Marriage (and Your Life) Feels Hollow

    This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit stayorgo.substack.com Episode 104: This week, I want to talk about the invisible architecture of your life. It’s something that sits underneath every decision you’ve ever made, every “yes” you’ve given, and every reason you have for staying exactly where you are right now. It’s your values. But here is the thing about values: most of us didn’t actually choose ours. We inherited them. We were handed a backpack full of beliefs by our families, our religions, and our culture, and we’ve been carrying them around for decades without ever stopping to look inside and ask, Is any of this actually mine? In this episode, I’m digging into the heart of the “Values Gap.” That specific, aching hollowness that happens when your life looks beautiful on the outside—the house, the kids, the stability—but feels empty on the inside because it was built on a foundation of someone else’s blueprints. I share my own messy, radical shift from the values I was taught as a young Mormon bride to the ones that sustain me now. We talk about why the reasons you chose your spouse at nineteen might not be the reasons you want to stay at forty, and why that doesn’t make you ungrateful or “wrong.” It just means you’ve grown. I want to give you the sacred permission that patriarchy and high-control systems try to take away: the right to overhaul your entire internal compass. I’ve also created a deep-dive Values Inventory Worksheet specifically for my paid Substack subscribers to help you map this out. Because the goal isn’t just to stay or go; the goal is to stop being a ghost in your own home and start living a life that actually resonates in your body. You get to pick again. You get to decide what matters. Let’s start there. 🤍 Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack ADHD for Smart Ass Women by Tracy Otsuka Keep Sweet: Pray and Obey (FLDS documentary) Prophet’s Prey (Warren Jeffs documentary) - Trailer Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook

    1h 19m
  7. Tarot and the Art of Inner Listening with Allison Alexander

    Apr 21

    Tarot and the Art of Inner Listening with Allison Alexander

    Episode 103: In this episode, I sit down with Allison Alexander for a conversation about tarot and the deeper work of self-connection it can open inside us. This is not a conversation about fortune telling. It is a conversation about what happens when you begin to trust that wisdom may already be living within you. We explore what it looks like to connect with your intuition. To listen for the truths beneath the noise of conditioning, fear, and overthinking. And to approach tarot not as something outside of you, but as a tool that helps you access what your body, your soul, and your inner voice may already know. At the center of this conversation is a powerful remembering. So many women have been taught that truth must come through prescribed channels. That access to the divine, to knowing, to authority lives somewhere outside of themselves. But what if the real invitation is to reclaim your own relationship with wisdom? To let symbolism, intuition, and the body become part of the language through which you come home to yourself? Through this conversation, you will hear what it means to approach tarot with reverence, curiosity, and openness. The tenderness, the mystery, the deep internal recognition. And how this practice can become a companion in seasons of change, grief, healing, and becoming. Not a way to escape yourself, but a way to meet yourself more fully. This episode is not really about tarot. It is about remembering how to trust your own knowing. ✨ Show Notes: Subscribe to Stay or Go on Substack Episode 50 Allison Alexander’s Website Allison Alexander’s Instagram Text 90MIN to 33777 to book a 90-Minute Session with me. ✨ Text STAYORGOCOMMUNITY to 33777 to join the community. ⚡️ Text EMAILME to 33777 for the free tarot guide using ChatGPT. 💫 YouTube Channel The Deep Dive - 3 Month One-on-One Coaching Intensive Stay or Go Community Instagram Facebook This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stayorgo.substack.com/subscribe

    1h 8m
  8. From Exit to Expansion: When Choosing Yourself Opens a New Door in Your Marriage

    Apr 14

    From Exit to Expansion: When Choosing Yourself Opens a New Door in Your Marriage

    This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit stayorgo.substack.com Episode 102: In this episode, I sit down with a woman from inside the Stay or Go community whose journey reveals something many of us quietly wrestle with. This is not a story about a bad marriage. It is a story about what happens when “good enough” is no longer enough. We explore what it looks like to stop abandoning yourself. To name what you truly want…

    56 min
See All (110)

4.6
out of 5
178 Ratings

About

Stay or Go is the bold, no-BS space where women on the edge of divorce find clarity, courage, and the unapologetic power to choose their future. stayorgo.substack.com

Information

You Might Also Like