The Way You Show Up

Kimberly Beam Holmes, PhD

Most people are living a version of themselves that they never choose.You've been showing up for your spouse, your kids, and your career—but you've been doing it on autopilot. You're living within a ceiling built by your past and sustained by your habits.I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health.If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here.New episodes every Tuesday.Don't just exist. Show up.

  1. 3D AGO

    What To Do When People Won't Freaking Listen

    Take the free assessment → https://kimberlybeamholmes.com/pies-assessment --------------------------------------------------- You've said it once. You've said it twice. You've said it fifteen times over four months. And somehow, nothing changes. You're not crazy. You're just not being heard. I lived this recently. I told a coworker in January that we needed to cut a software that wasn't working. He agreed. Or so I thought. Fast forward to April and we're still having the same conversation. January. That's when we decided. January. In this video, I'm breaking down the three reasons people don't listen when you speak and three things you can actually do about it. Distraction. Different wiring. Lack of clarity. These three things are behind almost every "why won't they just listen to me" moment you've ever had. I'm also walking you through the DISC personality framework (my favorite tool for understanding how people process information differently) and why speaking louder has never once helped someone understand you better. The hard question isn't "why won't they listen?" The hard question is "am I being a person worth listening to?" That's the one that changes everything. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    26 min
  2. APR 30

    The Way God Shows Up — Katie Simkins

    Katie Simkins didn't grow up knowing Jesus. She didn't grow up in church. She didn't grow up with hope. At 16, doctors found 11 precancerous growths in her body. A group of strangers prayed over her. The scans came back completely clear, not even scarring. Weeks later, her brother unexpectedly passed away. And what followed was a year she calls "the year of darkness." Walking in physical darkness. Carrying grief, guilt, and the weight of a question she couldn't answer... why would God heal me and then take him? This conversation wrecked me. Katie shares the moment she almost gave up. The woman who stopped her in the hallway. The prayer she thought was a goodbye that became a beginning. And how a thrift store army men set and a stranger's receipt marked "paid in full" is still teaching her kids who God is today. We talk about: What it looks like to follow Jesus when your friends hate Him. What it means to stop performing your faith and start living it. And why the greatest answer to prayer might not be a changed circumstance... but His presence in the middle of it. Let's dive in. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    1h 1m
  3. APR 23

    The Confidence Blueprint: How To Own Any Room

    How can you own the room and speak with confidence? Nobody cares if your palms are sweaty. Nobody cares if your voice shakes. Nobody cares if you're secretly terrified. They care if you command the space you're in. In this episode, I sit down with Eva Daniel, former speech writer at Ramsey Solutions, 11 years at Focus on the Family, now a speech coach to leaders, to break down what it actually takes to own a room. Stage. Zoom. Boardroom. Bible study. Tuesday team meeting. Ground your feet. Take the pause. Open your palms. Hold the thought. That's the game. We get into the pause that resets the entire room before you say a word, why you should never end on a Q&A (you just handed a stranger the mic), the "queso" moment that will change how you hear yourself forever, and the SPARK framework for walking in with something worth saying. If you've ever shrunk in a meeting, rushed through a presentation, or walked off stage wishing you'd been bigger in the moment... this one's for you. Get Eva's 12 Questions To Write A Killer Speech Here: speakshop.com I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    1 hr
  4. APR 16

    God Is Not A Republican (Or A Democrat)

    Talking to people who disagree with me politically has gotten hard. Like, really hard. Sometimes I feel like the world is going crazy and I don't know how to have a normal conversation anymore. So I brought in one of the smartest people I know, Dr. Rubel Shelly, to help me figure it out. He has his Master's and PhD from Vanderbilt. He's been a preacher for decades. And his view on how Christians should engage with politics is refreshing, clarifying, and honestly? A little challenging. In this episode, we get into it. Can Christians even be civil anymore? Should Christian principles become law? What's the difference between voting your values and Christian nationalism? Why did Constantine almost ruin Christianity? And what does it actually look like to love someone who votes the opposite of you? Rubel walks us through Tim Keller's framework, two "red" priorities, two "blue" priorities, and the fifth one we keep forgetting: blessed are the peacemakers. We talk about the early church dying for their faith. A young woman in Jerusalem choosing baptism knowing her family would kill her. Christians in India being told the law of Christ is higher than the law of the land. And the uncomfortable question I couldn't stop thinking about: Are we just trying to make Christianity easy? Because Jesus never made it easy. He told people to walk away from families, homes, and comfort to follow Him. It was never both/and. It was Jesus or nothing. My biggest takeaway from this whole conversation: My Christian beliefs matter more than the law of any land I could ever live in. It doesn't matter who's in Congress or in the Oval Office. Jesus is on the throne. That has to be the guiding principle. This one's long. This one's good. And this one might stretch you a little. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    1h 24m
  5. APR 9

    What No One Is Telling You About Using AI

    AI isn't intelligent. It's a calculator that learned how to talk. And we're treating it like a therapist, a best friend, a dating coach, even a parent. In this episode, I sit down with Jared Pratt, our resident AI expert at Marriage Helper, and he breaks down what AI actually is and what it absolutely is not. No real understanding. No real empathy. No real wisdom. Just math predicting the next word. People are building entire relationships with chatbots. They're outsourcing responses to their scared 10-year-old. They're letting an algorithm tell them who to date. That's the world we're living in right now. Jared explains how LLMs work in plain English, why these platforms are designed to keep you engaged (not to help you grow), and why younger generations are the most at risk. We also talk about what guardrails need to exist and the ones you can put in place for yourself today. AI isn't going away. But if we don't get smart about how we use it, we're headed for an intelligence epidemic where people stop thinking, stop feeling, and stop connecting altogether. This one's important. Watch the whole thing. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    51 min
  6. APR 7

    Why You Keep Losing Focus and Why Your Old Habits Are Keeping You Stuck

    You keep going back to what's comfortable. And it keeps producing nothing. That's exactly what Peter did. In this video, I'm studying John 21 with you and breaking down why Peter, after witnessing the resurrection, went right back to fishing. Back to the old habits. Back to what felt safe. Back to what produced nothing without Jesus. Sound familiar? I've been there. Running on the hamster wheel. Doing the things that feel normal instead of the things God is actually calling me to do. But here's what hit me: Jesus didn't give up on Peter. He showed up on that shore and reminded him of his focus. Three times. "Feed my sheep. Follow me. Stop worrying about everyone else." And Peter finally changed how he showed up. In this video, I walk through John 21, Luke 5, 1 Peter 1, and Acts 2 using the COMMA method of studying scripture (Context, Observation, Message, Meditation, Application) and share what God revealed to me about focus, habits, and purpose. This is the first time I've done anything like this on this channel, and I'd love for you to study scripture with me. Drop your takeaways in the comments. I learn from you just as much as I share with you. Subscribe and share this with someone who needs to hear it today. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    34 min
  7. Did Jesus Really Raise From The Dead?

    MAR 31

    Did Jesus Really Raise From The Dead?

    Did Jesus Really Raise From The Dead? If Jesus didn't raise from the dead, then nothing else in the Bible really matters. That's not just my opinion. That's what the Bible says about itself. So can we actually trust that the resurrection happened? That's the question I've been wanting to explore for years. In this episode, I sit down with one of my pastors, Cory Shumate, to walk through the logical case for the resurrection. Cory breaks it down in a way that doesn't require you to be a biblical scholar. We look at the four main theories people use to argue against the resurrection and why each one falls apart, and then we walk through the four key facts that point to the resurrection being true. In this episode, we cover: Why the resurrection is the foundation of the entire Christian faith, the mass hallucination theory and why it doesn't hold up, the legendary development theory and why there wasn't enough time for myths to form, the swoon theory and why Jesus couldn't have survived the cross, the stolen body theory and why none of the three versions of it make sense, the four facts that make the resurrection the most logical explanation, why the women being the first witnesses actually strengthens the case, extra biblical sources that confirm Jesus was crucified, why not everyone believes even when the evidence is compelling, Cory's personal story of going from atheism to faith, and why walking past the hard questions actually makes your faith weaker. Cory Shumate is a pastor whose faith journey began as an atheist in high school. His willingness to wrestle with doubt and ask hard questions is one of the things I admire most about him. 📖 Book mentioned: Risen Indeed by Gary Habermas 📖 Also referenced: The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel Whether you are a Christian looking for more confidence in what you believe or someone who's just curious and exploring, I hope this conversation gives you something to sit with. If you want to keep learning, I recommend checking out the Bible Project on YouTube for an approachable breakdown of what the Bible actually says. If this encouraged you, share it with someone who might be wrestling with these same questions. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    1h 4m
  8. The Biggest Mistake You Make When Friends Ask for Advice with Meredith Ball

    MAR 24

    The Biggest Mistake You Make When Friends Ask for Advice with Meredith Ball

    Ever feel like you've become the unofficial therapist in your friend group? You're not alone, and I've been there too. Most of us make one critical mistake when someone comes to us with a problem: we try to fix it. In this episode, I sit down with licensed professional counselor Meredith Ball (LPC) to talk about how to actually support the people in your life without overstepping, shutting them down, or burning yourself out. Meredith helped me see some things about my own listening habits that I honestly needed to hear, especially how growing up in a conservative church environment shaped the way I respond when people come to me with their struggles. In this episode, we cover: How to listen without jumping into fix-it mode, what to do when a friend is clearly making a bad decision, when and how to have a moral confrontation with someone you love, the one thing that keeps most of us from truly hearing another person, how to support a friend who's thinking about leaving their marriage, why "do whatever makes you happy" might be the worst advice you can give, what "doing the work" actually means, and the truth about whether AI and ChatGPT can replace real human connection. Meredith Ball is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Marriage Helper Certified Coach who specializes in helping individuals and couples navigate difficult relational dynamics. 📖 Book mentioned: The Lost Art of Listening by Michael Nichols and Martha Straus Here's what I took away from this conversation: everything is endurable, learning to set your emotions to the side so you can stay present with someone is a game changer, and how you show up for the people in your life starts with the work you're doing on yourself. If this episode helped you, share it with a friend who needs to hear it. I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended. The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine." We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health. If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here. New episodes every Tuesday. Don't just exist. Show up. 🔗 Website: https://kimberlybeamholmes.com 🎥YouTube https://youtube.com/@kimberlybeamholmes 📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimberlybeamholmes 👀 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimberlybeamholmes

    56 min
4.9
out of 5
408 Ratings

About

Most people are living a version of themselves that they never choose.You've been showing up for your spouse, your kids, and your career—but you've been doing it on autopilot. You're living within a ceiling built by your past and sustained by your habits.I'm Dr. Kimberly Beam Holmes. After a decade transforming marriages at Marriage Helper, I've realized that the greatest tragedy isn't a failed relationship; it's the person who stays stuck and never experiences the fullness of all God intended.The Way You Show Up is for the high-achiever who is tired of "fine."We're dismantling the average life to build an exceptional one—using the science of the PIES: Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual health.If you want to save your marriage, go to Marriage Helper. If you want to master yourself and lead your legacy, stay here.New episodes every Tuesday.Don't just exist. Show up.

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