Pause Purpose Play

Michaela Thomas

Imagine if you could follow your ambition without drowning in it – how much more fulfilling life would be? That’s what Pause Purpose Play is all about – finding balance over burnout by setting you free from needing to be perfect, so that you can take action and get started with what matters to you, instead of getting stuck in procrastination and holding yourself back with self-limiting beliefs your inner critic tells you. In this podcast, Michaela Thomas, Clinical Psychologist, Couples Therapist and founder of The Thomas Connection, shares bite-sized learning around psychology of performance, habits, self-confidence, stress, anxiety, perfectionism, parenthood and couples relationships. The podcast will mix solo episodes with guest interviews; diving deep into their professional zone of genius and learning about how they have found pause, purpose and play in their life and in their work. My new book, The Lasting Connection, is available now from all good bookshops.

  1. 2D AGO

    What your partner needs to know about ADHD

    If you've been diagnosed with ADHD, and your partner wants to know how to better support you - this episode is for you.  If ADHD is creating tension, misunderstandings, or repeated arguments in your relationship - this episode is also for you.   In this solo episode, Clinical Psychologist Michaela Thomas shares what she would want a partner to understand if they were sitting together in the therapy room.  This episode isn’t about excuses or blame.  It’s about understanding how ADHD affects nervous systems, emotions, communication, and relationships — and what actually helps, rather than makes things worse.   In this episode, we explore: Why ADHD is not an excuse, but is an explanation Why “trying harder” often leads to more shame and burnout, not change What happens when someone with ADHD is stuck in rumination or emotional collapse Why logic and reassurance don’t land when the nervous system is dysregulated Rejection sensitivity (RSD) and how tone, silence, and facial expressions can be misread How past relational wounds can be triggered in the present The common “parent–child” dynamic that can develop in ADHD relationships How to support your partner without taking over or eroding their agency A free resource for couples If this episode resonated, Michaela has created a free guide called Balance Your Relationship. It’s designed to help couples step out of blame and back into understanding — with compassion for both partners.   Download the free guide here: http://thethomasconnection.co.uk/relationshipbalance/

    19 min
  2. 12/18/2025

    Calm the overwhelm at Christmas

    Already feeling stretched by the festive season? This episode is your invitation to slow down and protect your energy. In this solo episode of the Pause Purpose Play podcast, Clinical Psychologist Michaela Thomas explores why the holiday season can feel so overwhelming and draining, especially for women with busy brains, ADHD traits, or perfectionistic tendencies - and how to move through it with more intention and self-compassion. Michaela introduces the idea of balancing what drains you with what sustains you, and shares how using a visual schedule can help you manage energy more realistically, plan ahead, and reduce burnout. Rather than striving for a “perfect” Christmas, this episode encourages lowering expectations, setting boundaries, and prioritising rest before you reach exhaustion. Michaela also shares more about Golden, her immersive in-person experience for high-achieving ADHD women who need space to pause and recharge, reconnecting with their purpose and values. The episode ends with little permission pieces in reflections from women who attended the previous Golden event - gentle reminders that you’re not alone and that slowing down is allowed. ✨ In this episode: Why the festive season can feel especially draining for busy, ADHD brains The concept of drains vs. sustains and why energy matters more than time Using a visual schedule to plan with compassion Letting go of perfection and choosing rest Permission slips from other women just like you Join the next Golden event on the 30th of January in London, grab your ticket here: https://thethomasconnection.thrivecart.com/golden-in-person-event-jan-2026/

    21 min
  3. 12/11/2025

    What Happens Before, During and After an ADHD Assessment?

    If you’ve been wondering what actually happens in an ADHD assessment, or you’re thinking about booking one but feel unsure about the process, this solo episode walks you through everything you need to know.    Michaela breaks down what to expect before, during and after an adult ADHD assessment, based on her clinical process at her psychology practice The Thomas Connection.   Whether you’re exploring a diagnosis for yourself or supporting someone you care about, this episode brings clarity, reassurance and practical guidance.   In this episode you’ll learn: • What happens before the assessment  Why a clarity call can help you feel safe and informed, what forms you’ll complete, and how childhood history fits into the picture. • What the initial screening session is really for  How clinicians decide whether full ADHD assessment is appropriate, and why ruling in or out overlapping conditions is essential. • What a full diagnostic assessment looks like  A gentle, structured interview process (usually spread over a month if virtually, or all in one day if choosing the home retreat option in Michaela's home), how your life story is explored, and why input from someone who knew you as a child can be helpful. • What gets assessed — and what doesn’t  The difference between ADHD traits, burnout, anxiety and perfectionism…and why good clinicians never diagnose from a single questionnaire. • What happens after the assessment  What your diagnostic report includes, how to share it with your GP for medication or shared care, and what support options like therapy, coaching or community groups look like whether you receive an ADHD diagnosis or not. • Why a thoughtful assessment matters  How a proper evaluation offers clarity, validation, compassion and a personalised plan, and a lens to see yourself through rather than just a label.   •  Who this episode is for: Anyone curious about ADHD assessment, already booked in for one, or supporting a partner, friend or colleague through the process.   Book an ADHD assessment clarity call with Michaela here: https://tidycal.com/michaela-thomas/adhd-assessment-clarity-call

    28 min
  4. 12/04/2025

    Running for mental health and ADHD, with Dr Chloe Bedford

    Have you ever wondered whether running is helping your mental health… or draining it? In this episode, we dig into the real relationship between running and wellbeing - when it is helpful and when it is less helpful, or even outright harmful, to push the body through running exercise and marathons. I’m joined by Counselling Psychologist and passionate runner Dr Chloe Bedford for an honest, compassionate conversation about the complex dynamics between running, identity, and emotional regulation,  especially for busy, perfectionistic, or neurodivergent minds. We explore both the light and dark sides of running - the clarity, calm, emotional regulation, and resilience it can bring… and the perfectionism, guilt, pressure, and burnout that can creep in when movement becomes another place we strive or push too hard to beat a personal best or complete a particular race despite it making us ill or injured. Dr Chloe Bedford is a Counselling Psychologist working with adults, teens, and children struggling with their mental health. She has over 15 years experience of working in both the NHS and private practice. Chloe has spent time working in a specialist eating disorder service for teens and through this, as well as her own love of running, developed an interest in the complex relationship we can have with our bodies, eating and exercise. Chloe is an enthusiastic runner, and has run many half marathons and 10kms. One day she dreams of making it to the start line of a marathon, but as a mother she accepts that this might have to wait.  Together, we unpack how to approach running in a way that supports your wellbeing rather than drains it. We also talk about how fitness culture, social media, and societal expectations shape our beliefs about what running “should” look like - and the liberation that comes from choosing your own pace, your own goals, and your own rhythm. This episode is for you if you’ve ever: Used running to cope or regulate your emotions Slipped into all-or-nothing thinking around movement Felt guilty when you “didn’t do enough” Compared yourself to others or felt pressure to perform Wanted a more compassionate, sustainable relationship with exercise Chloe brings both psychological expertise and lived experience to help you create a version of running - or any kind of movement - that genuinely supports your mental health. Chloe is acutely aware of the benefits that running has had on her own mental well-being, as a psychologist, as a mother, and as a human. She shares her experience and the science behind how it can help, along with other mental health information, on her Instagram account (@the.running.psychologist), in the hope that this might help others. Connect with Chloe: www.marathonpsychology.com

    47 min

Trailers

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About

Imagine if you could follow your ambition without drowning in it – how much more fulfilling life would be? That’s what Pause Purpose Play is all about – finding balance over burnout by setting you free from needing to be perfect, so that you can take action and get started with what matters to you, instead of getting stuck in procrastination and holding yourself back with self-limiting beliefs your inner critic tells you. In this podcast, Michaela Thomas, Clinical Psychologist, Couples Therapist and founder of The Thomas Connection, shares bite-sized learning around psychology of performance, habits, self-confidence, stress, anxiety, perfectionism, parenthood and couples relationships. The podcast will mix solo episodes with guest interviews; diving deep into their professional zone of genius and learning about how they have found pause, purpose and play in their life and in their work. My new book, The Lasting Connection, is available now from all good bookshops.

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