Relationships Made Easy

Dr. Abby Medcalf

The research says the key to a happy life is happy relationships. But how exactly do you make your relationships better? That’s what this show is all about.   I’m Dr. Abby Medcalf, psychologist, best-selling author, TEDx speaker, and (according to my kids) the bossy Jewish mom you didn’t know you needed. With decades of experience and millions of listeners in over 180 countries, I give you the no-fluff, research-backed strategies to make all your relationships better: with your partner, your family, your friends, and (most importantly) yourself.   Every week on the Relationships Made Easy podcast, I mix straight talk, humor, and science to help you communicate effectively, set healthy boundaries, and stop second-guessing yourself. Because great relationships aren’t built in a day. Great relationships are built daily. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  1. 20H AGO

    370. Should You Have Kids or Not? The Psychology Behind One of Life’s Biggest Decisions

    Deciding whether to have kids isn’t just a practical decision. It’s one of the few choices in life that can feel irreversible, identity-shaping, and loaded with expectations you never asked for. Maybe part of you imagines a future with children and feels something warm and meaningful. And another part of you imagines the same future and feels panic, grief, or a quiet sense of “I’m not sure this is for me.” In this episode, I’m breaking down what the research actually says about parenthood, happiness, and meaning, why this decision feels so emotionally charged, and the five questions that genuinely help you figure out what you want, not what you’re supposed to want. If you’ve ever felt stuck between fear, pressure, and honesty about your own life, this episode is for you. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-decide-whether-to-have-kids     Download The Kids Decision Snapshot. It will help you start to think this through in a grounded way without pushing you toward any answer: https://abbymedcalf.com/kids-decision-snapshot   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.   Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    38 min
  2. FEB 10

    369. Avoidant Attachment: How to Love an Avoidant Partner Without Chasing or Losing Yourself

    If you love someone who shuts down, pulls away, or goes emotionally quiet when things get close, this episode is for you. You might feel confused, lonely, or like you’re constantly guessing where you stand. Today, you’ll learn why people are avoidantly attached, why pursuing closeness backfires, and how to love an avoidant partner without chasing, over-explaining, or disappearing yourself. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/avoidant-attachment-in-relationships   Get the Scripts! Loving an Avoidant Partner: 10 Things to Say and Not Say When They Pull Away. This guide gives you clear scripts, common traps, and repair language so you can show up grounded, direct, and self-respecting: https://abbymedcalf.com/avoidant-partner-scripts   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.   Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    41 min
  3. FEB 3

    368. When Your Partner Needs Constant Reassurance: What Helps and What Hurts

    If you love someone who needs a lot of reassurance, clarity, or emotional check-ins, this episode is for you. Today you’ll learn what anxious attachment is actually responding to, why reassurance doesn’t work long-term, and how to love an anxious partner in a way that creates real safety without losing yourself in the process. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-love-an-anxiously-attached-partner Download Loving an Anxious Partner: 10 Things to Say (and Not Say) When Anxiety Shows Up: https://abbymedcalf.com/anxious-partner-scripts Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack. You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________ Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/  👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries 👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook 👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes. Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    53 min
  4. JAN 27

    367. Why Anxious and Avoidant Partners Keep Getting Stuck in the Same Cycle

    If you’ve ever been in a romantic relationship where one of you keeps reaching for closeness while the other pulls away just when things feel important, this episode is for you. If part of you feels like you’re always chasing connection, or part of you feels like too much closeness makes you want to escape, you’re not broken. You’re likely in an anxious-avoidant dynamic. Anxious and avoidant partners don’t randomly fall in love. This pairing is common for very specific psychological and nervous system reasons. Today I want to help you understand that pattern so you can stop personalizing what’s happening and start seeing it clearly. This is Part One of a three-part series. Today is about naming the dynamic. The next two episodes will focus on how to love an anxious partner and how to love an avoidant partner without losing yourself. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/anxious-avoidant-relationships   Download Where Are You in the Anxious-Avoidant Cycle Right Now? It’s a quick self-assessment to help you understand how you’re showing up in your relationship when things get hard: https://abbymedcalf.com/anxious-avoidant-cycle-assessment   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.   Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    33 min
  5. JAN 20

    366. Divorcing a Narcissistic Ex: Why It Escalates and How to Protect Yourself and Your Kids

    Most people expect a divorce or breakup to be painful. What they don’t expect is for it to feel strategic, relentless, and never-ending. If you’re separating from someone with narcissistic traits, you’re likely treating it as a transition, but they’re treating it like a war. Today you’ll learn why divorcing or breaking up with a narcissistic partner follows a completely different set of psychological rules, the mindset shifts that help you stop taking the bait, and what you need to do differently, especially if you have kids and want to protect them long-term. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/divorcing-or-breaking-up-with-a-narcissist   Are You Divorcing or Breaking Up with Someone Who Has Narcissistic Traits? Get the Reality-Check Quiz:  https://abbymedcalf.com/narcissistic-breakup-quiz   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.   Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 12m
  6. JAN 13

    365. Should You Stay or Leave Your Relationship?

    How do you know when it’s time to stop trying in a relationship? I get asked this question a lot. How do you know if you’re giving up too soon? How do you know if a relationship still deserves more effort? How do you know if you’ll regret leaving?   These questions show up after you’ve already tried. After the conversations, the compromises, the therapy, the books, and the waiting. What makes this decision especially hard is that, by the time you’re asking it, you’re often not just confused. You’re likely self-gaslighting. While this isn’t a clinical diagnosis, it’s a pattern I see all the time. It’s when you talk yourself out of your own experience in order to avoid discomfort, loss, or a hard truth.   Today, you’ll learn why this decision feels so hard even when you’ve been unhappy for a long time, what psychological and biological forces keep you stuck, and how to assess what you actually need in a relationship so you can decide what to do next without panic, self-blame, or regret. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-know-when-to-stop-trying-in-a-relationship 👉  Get the Relationship Clarity Worksheet. It walks you through identifying your non-negotiables, rating consistency, naming non-tolerables, and answering the long-term question in a grounded way:  https://abbymedcalf.com/relationship-clarity-worksheet   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes. Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    56 min
  7. JAN 6

    364. You Think Everyone Is Judging You, But They Aren’t

    You think everyone is watching you. You think they noticed the weird thing you said. You think they’re analyzing your silence or your laugh or that moment you stumbled over your words. Then you replay it like it’s your job. Why can’t you stop?! You’re overthinking because your brain is running an old program from a time when belonging was survival. You’re not the problem. The wiring is the problem. So today you’re going to learn why your brain assumes people are thinking about you when they aren’t, what the research says about this spotlight you feel trapped under, and the three tools you can use to shut down the spiral so you can walk into any room steady and grounded. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/stop-overthinking-what-people-think Get The Overthinking Interrupt Formula: https://abbymedcalf.com/overthinking-formula   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week!  https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.   Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    29 min
  8. 12/16/2025

    363. What to Do When Your Partner Shuts Down in Conflict

    Your partner is not trying to ignore you during conflict. Their brain is overwhelmed. In this episode I explain emotional flooding, why it happens, and what actually helps in the moment. You will walk away with clear steps you can use today. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/emotional-flooding-in-relationships   If you want exact language for these moments, download my one-page script pack: https://abbymedcalf.com/emotional-flooding-scripts   Join my online community, One Love Collective, on Substack: https://abbymedcalf.com/substack.   You'll get... ✨ Early drops + ad-free podcast episodes ✨ Worksheets, journal prompts, downloads, and guided visualizations ✨ Community chats and live Q&A calls with Abby _________   Subscribe to the Love Letter and get my little messages each week! https://abbymedcalf.com/loveletter-opt-in/    👉 Pick up a copy of my new book, Boundaries Made Easy: Your Roadmap to Connection, Easy and Joy: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries   👉 Pick up The Workbook: Boundaries Made Easier to use as a companion to the book or as a standalone masterclass: https://abbymedcalf.com/boundaries-workbook   👉 Buy my #1 bestselling book on Amazon, Be Happily Married: Even If Your Partner Won’t Do a Thing: https://abbymedcalf.com/book  ____________________________ Looking for past episodes of the Relationships Made Easy Podcast? Head over to https://abbymedcalf.com/podcast-the-archives where you’ll find past episodes.   Ready to dig deeper? Take one of my online courses (some are FREE!) or grab a workbook: https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   A great idea to stay motivated and keep your head in a positive direction is to buy some of my fabulous, inspirational merchandise. Get yourself a t-shirt, mug, tote bag or notebook with that daily reminder that you’ve got this! https://abbymedcalf.com/shop   Say hello on social: Substack: https://substack.com/@abbymedcalfphd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abbymedcalfthriving LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/abbymedcalfthriving YouTube: https://abbymedcalf.com/youtube Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    41 min
5
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

The research says the key to a happy life is happy relationships. But how exactly do you make your relationships better? That’s what this show is all about.   I’m Dr. Abby Medcalf, psychologist, best-selling author, TEDx speaker, and (according to my kids) the bossy Jewish mom you didn’t know you needed. With decades of experience and millions of listeners in over 180 countries, I give you the no-fluff, research-backed strategies to make all your relationships better: with your partner, your family, your friends, and (most importantly) yourself.   Every week on the Relationships Made Easy podcast, I mix straight talk, humor, and science to help you communicate effectively, set healthy boundaries, and stop second-guessing yourself. Because great relationships aren’t built in a day. Great relationships are built daily. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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