Untethering Shame

Kyira Wackett
  • 5.0 (20)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

New episodes every Sunday! Shame is the fear of not being good enough or worthy of connection and belonging. This silent plague keeps us tethered to the performance, focused on external validation and approval versus internal rooting. It can disrupt every relationship, thought, and experience if left unchecked. And it's time we say enough. Join licensed mental health therapist, Kyira Wackett, in the quest to build insight and take meaningful and intentional actions as we untether ourselves from shame. 

  1. Shame & Money: Rewriting the “I’m Bad with Money” Story with Michelle Waymire

    6H AGO

    Shame & Money: Rewriting the “I’m Bad with Money” Story with Michelle Waymire

    In this heartfelt and eye-opening conversation, Kyira sits down with Michelle Waymire, a queer, anti-capitalist financial advisor and founder of Young + Scrappy, to explore the deep intersection of shame and money. Together, they unpack the beliefs and stories we carry about money—stories often formed in childhood—that shape our self-worth, safety, and sense of control. Michelle shares her own early experiences with privilege and how they informed her journey toward more compassionate, values-based financial work. From the myth of being “bad with money” to the toxic narratives of hustle culture and financial perfectionism, Kyira and Michelle reframe what it means to be in relationship with money. They invite listeners to approach finances not as a measure of worth but as an evolving, deeply personal practice of self-trust, curiosity, and care. The episode dives into practical and emotional layers alike: how to detach shame from financial mistakes, how to talk about money with children without passing on our anxieties, and how to begin shifting from scarcity and control to neutrality and self-compassion. Whether you’re working to pay down debt, trying to feel safer in your financial decisions, or just tired of feeling like you’re doing it “wrong,” this conversation will help you see money in a radically new light. ✨ Key Takeaways: Money stories start early. Our beliefs about worth, safety, and belonging often take root in childhood, long before we ever earn a paycheck.Shame thrives in silence. Talking openly about money—and the emotions tied to it—is the first step toward dismantling self-judgment.Neutrality creates freedom. Numbers themselves aren’t good or bad; it’s the stories and emotions we attach to them that fuel shame.Our relationship with money is iterative. Like any other form of growth, it evolves with time, experience, and compassion for our past selves.Values matter more than perfection. Spending and saving aligned with what truly matters to you leads to financial peace, not rigid control.Parenting and money mirror each other. How we model curiosity, autonomy, and boundaries around money teaches our children self-trust—not fear.There’s no such thing as being “bad with money.” Every financial journey holds both mistakes and wins; noticing the wins helps rewrite your story.Shame disconnects; curiosity reconnects. Moving from “I’m bad with money” to “I’m learning about money” opens the door to growth.Financial wellness is emotional wellness. Healing money shame means healing the parts of us that believe we’re not enough.Progress over perfection. The goal isn’t to fix your finances overnight—it’s to build a kinder, more resilient relationship with them over time. More about Michelle: Michelle is a queer, anti-capitalist financial advisor and coach and the founder of two financial services companies: Young & Scrappy and Glimmer Financial. They are passionate about supporting marginalized groups in building a better relationship with their money, so that they can live joyful and abundant lives. Connect with Michelle: Young & ScrappyGlimmer Financial Ready to take the next step? Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs. Stay Connected: Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.YouTubeWebsite

    53 min
  2. 🎙️Ask Me Anything – E25: When It’s Not About You (But It Still Hurts)

    6D AGO

    🎙️Ask Me Anything – E25: When It’s Not About You (But It Still Hurts)

    In this week’s AMA, Kyira answers a question from a listener who works in a job where they’re constantly being yelled at — not because they’ve done something wrong, but because they’re the one standing in front of people when things go wrong. Even when you know it isn’t personal, it can still feel personal. So how do you hold onto your empathy without letting shame or resentment take over? Kyira explores the tension between logic and emotion — why your nervous system reacts as if you’re under attack, even when your brain knows better — and how to protect your dignity without losing your compassion. This episode is about reclaiming your sense of peace in the face of others’ chaos, learning to name what’s yours (and what’s not), and remembering that caring doesn’t mean carrying. 💡 Key Takeaways Your nervous system reacts faster than logic — even when you know it’s not about you, your body still feels the threat.Boundaries protect your dignity and keep you grounded in your values.Empathy doesn’t mean absorbing other people’s emotions or taking on their work.Anger isn’t a flaw — it’s a signal that your boundaries have been crossed.Create small rituals to reset and release what isn’t yours. 🔗 Resources & Mentions Join the Boundaried & Brave challenge to deepen your work around emotional boundaries and self-trust. Have a question you’d like Kyira to explore in a future AMA episode? Submit it at adversityrising.com/podcast

    10 min
  3. Shame & Being Dangerous: The Revolutionary Act of Loving Yourself with The Tracy Piper

    OCT 26

    Shame & Being Dangerous: The Revolutionary Act of Loving Yourself with The Tracy Piper

    A year after her first appearance, artist The Tracy Piper returns to Untethering Shame to talk about her evolution from loud advocate to deeply self-aware creator — and how being dangerous became her new form of love and resistance. In this powerful conversation, Tracy and Kyira explore how vulnerability, rest, and authenticity threaten systems that profit from our numbness. They unpack the “dangerous” act of taking up space, setting boundaries, saying no, and believing we are worthy — even when it challenges old stories, relationships, and cultural conditioning. Together, they invite listeners to rethink what it means to be dangerous — not as harm, but as healing — and to see how doing the work of self-love and radical acceptance can be a revolution in itself. Key Takeaways Dangerous doesn’t mean harmful — it means disruptive. True danger lies in being brave enough to rest, speak up, and love yourself in a world that thrives on burnout and compliance. Rest is rebellion. Taking a nap, saying no, or slowing down can trigger shame and fear because our brains have learned these acts are “unsafe.” Learning to rest is a form of reprogramming. We’re not that important — and that’s freeing. Letting go of the illusion that the world will fall apart if we stop allows us to reclaim balance, presence, and boundaries. Radical acceptance means choosing what’s yours to carry. You can’t control how others respond, but you can stop reinforcing your own suffering by trying to manage everything. Authenticity is dangerous to systems that depend on your silence. Whether it’s family dynamics, hustle culture, or gender expectations, showing up truthfully challenges the status quo. Vulnerability builds community. The most dangerous — and healing — act is to let yourself be seen, loved, and connected, even when it feels safer to go it alone. Art as activism. Tracy’s Dangerous tour invites audiences to explore self-love through creativity, offering visual permission to rest, reflect, and reconnect. More About Tracy: The Tracy Piper is a contemporary painter, muralist, and activist whose vibrant figurative work celebrates self-love, empowerment, and the radical act of authenticity. A former circus performer turned full-time artist, Tracy’s work merges bold color with emotional honesty to challenge the narratives that keep us small and silent. Her newest exhibition, Dangerous: A Pop-Up Art Experience, explores the revolutionary power of self-acceptance and the idea that loving yourself in a world that profits from your doubt is the most dangerous act of all. Based in the Bay Area, Tracy’s art has been featured in galleries across the U.S., and she continues to use her platform to foster connection, conversation, and creative rebellion. Connect with Tracy Website & Art: thetracypiper.comInstagram: @thetracypiperDangerous Pop-Up Tour Dates: Portland (Nov 6–9), Miami (Art Basel Weekend), San Francisco (Summer 2026)Merch Line: Soft Rebellion sweaters and tees available at thetracypiper.com Ready to take the next step? Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs. Stay Connected: Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.YouTubeWebsite

    49 min
  4. 🎙️Ask Me Anything – E24: Why Can’t I Keep It All Together Without Crashing?

    OCT 20

    🎙️Ask Me Anything – E24: Why Can’t I Keep It All Together Without Crashing?

    In this episode, I respond to a question from an anonymous listener who writes: “Kyira, I feel like I’m always running at 100%, sometimes even 110%, just to keep everything together. I tell myself I’m fine, but then one small thing tips me over and I completely crash. Why does this keep happening, and how do I break the cycle without feeling like I’m failing?” If you’ve ever lived on the edge of burnout, calling it “normal,” you know how exhausting and defeating that cycle can feel. We’re taught that giving our all means giving everything, all the time—but what if the truth is that sustainability actually lives at 80%, not 100? Inside this episode, we’ll talk about: Why our idea of “100% capacity” is rooted in hustle culture and survivalThe crash-and-burn cycle and why it’s not a personal failureWhat it means to treat 80% as the new 100%Practical shifts that help you design a sustainable system for your lifeHow to separate your worth from your outputIf you’ve ever felt like “fine until I’m not fine” is your baseline, this episode is for you. 📝 Want to submit a question for a future episode? Nothing is off-limits (well, almost nothing). ⁠Submit here⁠ anonymously or with your name — whatever feels safest for you. 👉 https://forms.gle/1uYJ87Y2Vag6KYCeA 🧠 If this episode spoke to you, share it with someone who might need it. Let’s break the shame cycle — together. Ready to take the next step? Download the FREE handout, “⁠5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day⁠” to start grounding your life in values, not shame.⁠Book a free 25-minute discovery call⁠ to explore personalized coaching or programs that support your next step.Stay Connected: Subscribe on ⁠Spotify⁠ or ⁠Apple⁠, and leave a review to share your thoughts.⁠YouTube⁠⁠Website⁠💬 Rest isn’t laziness—it’s what makes your life sustainable. #AskMeAnything #BurnoutRecovery #ShameResilience #SustainableLiving #AdversityRising

    8 min
  5. Shame & the Shoulds: Unlearning Who You Were Told to Be with Mikkel Leslie

    OCT 19

    Shame & the Shoulds: Unlearning Who You Were Told to Be with Mikkel Leslie

    In this episode of Untethering Shame, I sit down with Mikkel Leslie — coach, author, and advocate for living a life that truly feels like yours — to explore the intersection of shame, anxiety, and the “ideal self.” “We’ve spent our whole lives being told who we should be. At some point, we stop asking what actually feels right for us.” Mikkel shares her story of leaving behind a successful but misaligned career in engineering and tech to rediscover her authentic self — a journey that included burnout, anxiety, and a reckoning with the stories she was taught about worth, stability, and success. Together, we unpack how early conditioning shapes our choices, how anxiety keeps us performing and conforming, and what it really means to reconnect with the emotional and physical cues that tell us who we are. Inside this episode, we talk about: The “conveyor belt” of expectation and how it leads us away from who we really areWhat happens when your achievements don’t feel fulfilling — and why money or success can’t fix internal disconnectionThe shame spiral that keeps us stuck in roles that look “right” but feel wrongHow anxiety disconnects us from our emotions and body — and how to rebuild that relationshipThe role of self-compassion as a tool for clarity, not just comfortLearning to breathe, pause, and create space to ask, “What do I actually want?”The tension between paying the bills and pursuing your truth — and how to find both balance and bravery in transitionLetting go of the fear of judgment when redefining success on your own termsIf you’ve ever felt like you were living someone else’s version of your life, this episode is for you. You can’t think your way to your ideal self. You have to feel your way there.Pause before you pivot. The answers come in the stillness, not the scramble.Self-compassion isn’t indulgence — it’s clarity.Anxiety disconnects us from our intuition. Healing starts when we reconnect body, mind, and emotion.You’re not behind — you’re just ready to live differently.More about Mikkel: Mikkel Leslie is a champion, author, and coach for those ready to live their own lives. She has coached hundreds of individuals awakening them to their potential. Before coaching, Mikkel went through her own journey of self-exploration, moving from what she was supposed to do, to what she is passionate about. Her journey started with engineering, tech, and sales and has led her to inspiring others to stand up for their own lives. You will find her at the beach in Southern California with her husband and pet plants. Connect with Mikkel: InstagramReady to take the next step? Join the ⁠Boundaries & Brave Email Challenge⁠⁠Submit a Question⁠ for the PodcastDownload the FREE handout, "⁠5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day⁠" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.⁠Book a free 25-minute discovery call⁠ to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.Stay Connected: Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.YouTubeWebsite🧭 Key Takeaways

    55 min
  6. 🎙️Ask Me Anything – E23: Am I Wrong for Limiting My Parents’ Access to My Kids?

    OCT 13

    🎙️Ask Me Anything – E23: Am I Wrong for Limiting My Parents’ Access to My Kids?

    In this episode, I respond to a question from an anonymous listener who writes: “My parents act like they have a right to unlimited access to my kids, even though they barely respect me as their parent. How do I deal with their guilt trips without cutting them off completely?” This is one of the toughest dynamics adult children face: navigating the expectations parents bring into the grandparent role. When access to your kids gets demanded instead of earned, it can create huge tension and guilt. Inside this episode, we’ll talk about: Why grandparent access isn’t an automatic rightHow guilt trips erode trust instead of building connectionWhy respecting you as the parent is the foundation of being included as a grandparentPractical ways to set boundaries around your kids without severing ties completelyIf you’ve ever felt torn between protecting your children and avoiding conflict with your parents, this episode is for you. 📝 Want to submit a question for a future episode? Nothing is off-limits (well, almost nothing). ⁠Submit here⁠ anonymously or with your name — whatever feels safest for you. 👉 https://forms.gle/1uYJ87Y2Vag6KYCeA 🧠 If this episode spoke to you, share it with someone who might need it. Let’s break the silence — together. Ready to take the next step? Download the FREE handout, “⁠5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day⁠” to start grounding your life in values, not shame.⁠Book a free 25-minute discovery call⁠ to explore personalized coaching or programs that support your next step.Stay Connected: Subscribe on ⁠Spotify⁠ or ⁠Apple⁠, and leave a review to share your thoughts.⁠YouTube⁠⁠Website⁠💬 Being a grandparent is a privilege, not a right — and it begins with respecting your child as the parent. #AskMeAnything #FamilyBoundaries #ParentingAndShame #ShameResilience #AdversityRising

    7 min
  7. Shame & Creative Inhibition: Unlearning the Fear of Making with Shannon MacFarlane

    OCT 12

    Shame & Creative Inhibition: Unlearning the Fear of Making with Shannon MacFarlane

    In this episode of Untethering Shame, Kyira sits down with photographer, painter, and grief educator Shannon McFarland to explore the intersection of shame and creativity. Many of us grow up believing creativity is something we either have or don’t—a gift reserved for the “artistic.” Shannon challenges that belief, inviting us to see creativity as a practice of presence, process, and self-expression rather than performance or perfection. Together, she and Kyira unpack how early criticism, evaluation, and comparison can silence our creative voices, and how reclaiming that voice is one of the most powerful ways to reconnect with ourselves. From stories about art class trauma and commissioned work to lessons from teaching painting in nursing facilities, Shannon reminds us that creativity isn’t about talent—it’s about curiosity, safety, and willingness to take risks. The conversation also touches on parenting, self-compassion, and how to model creative freedom for the next generation. If you’ve ever said “I’m not creative,” or stopped yourself from making something because it wouldn’t be “good enough,” this episode will help you see that creativity lives in the way you dress, solve problems, make dinner, and respond to life itself. Key Takeaways: Creativity is a practice, not a product. It’s something we nurture through curiosity, mistakes, and repetition—not something we’re born with or without.Evaluation kills exploration. When creativity becomes about grades, praise, or performance, it shuts down our willingness to take risks.Shame often begins early. A single comment from a teacher, parent, or peer can silence creativity for decades; awareness helps us break that cycle.Safety is the foundation for self-expression. People can only create freely when they feel emotionally safe, seen, and unjudged.Art as connection. Rather than evaluating what a person makes, focus on what it means and what emotions or memories it evokes.Creativity lives everywhere. From cooking and organizing to problem-solving and parenting, we express creativity daily—even if we don’t call it that.Let go of external standards. The value of your art—or any act of creation—doesn’t depend on whether others “get it.”Model what you want to nurture. Children (and adults) learn creativity by watching us take risks, make mistakes, and create for joy, not validation.Repurpose and celebrate. Host small art shows, reuse creative work, or make gifts—rituals that honor the process while keeping it playful.Creativity is an act of radical self-connection. It invites us to reenter our own lives, find meaning in imperfection, and reconnect with wonder. More about Shannon: I'm a quirky, awkward, and kinda endearing person who cares a whole lot. I'm really interested in difficult, uncomfortable things and being present while those are being worked through, whether it's my stuff or someone else's. People know me as a photographer, painter, grief educator, and art teacher. Connect with Shannon: WebsiteInstagramSubstack Ready to take the next step? Join the ⁠Boundaries & Brave Email Challenge⁠⁠Submit a Question⁠ for the PodcastDownload the FREE handout, "⁠5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day⁠" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.⁠Book a free 25-minute discovery call⁠ to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs. Stay Connected: Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.YouTubeWebsite

    1h 4m
  8. 🎙️Ask Me Anything – E22: Why Do I Feel Like the Villain Every Time I Set a Boundary with My Mom?

    OCT 6

    🎙️Ask Me Anything – E22: Why Do I Feel Like the Villain Every Time I Set a Boundary with My Mom?

    In this episode, I respond to a question from an anonymous listener who writes: “Why do I feel like the villain every time I set a boundary with my mom? I’ll say no to something simple, and suddenly I’m the worst child in the world. How do I not get crushed by the guilt?” If you’ve ever tried to set a boundary with a parent — only to be met with anger, guilt trips, or silence — you know how brutal it can feel. Boundaries are meant to protect relationships, but when parents push back, it can leave you drowning in shame. Inside this episode, we’ll talk about: Why boundaries are not rejection but an act of loveThe difference between your guilt and their discomfortHow “boundary backlash” shows up in familiesPractical ways to hold the line without over-explaining or apologizingIf you’ve ever felt like setting a boundary makes you the “bad guy,” this episode is for you. 📝 Want to submit a question for a future episode? Nothing is off-limits (well, almost nothing). ⁠Submit here⁠ anonymously or with your name — whatever feels safest for you. 👉 https://forms.gle/1uYJ87Y2Vag6KYCeA 🧠 If this episode spoke to you, share it with someone who might need it. Let’s break the silence — together. Ready to take the next step? Download the FREE handout, “⁠5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day⁠” to start grounding your life in values, not shame.⁠Book a free 25-minute discovery call⁠ to explore personalized coaching or programs that support your next step.Stay Connected: Subscribe on ⁠Spotify⁠ or ⁠Apple⁠, and leave a review to share your thoughts.⁠YouTube⁠⁠Website⁠💬 Boundaries are not rejection — they’re the doorway to healthier connection. #AskMeAnything #FamilyBoundaries #ShameResilience #AdultChildren #AdversityRising

    5 min
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About

New episodes every Sunday! Shame is the fear of not being good enough or worthy of connection and belonging. This silent plague keeps us tethered to the performance, focused on external validation and approval versus internal rooting. It can disrupt every relationship, thought, and experience if left unchecked. And it's time we say enough. Join licensed mental health therapist, Kyira Wackett, in the quest to build insight and take meaningful and intentional actions as we untether ourselves from shame. 

Information

  • Creator
    Kyira Wackett
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2025
  • Episodes
    191
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Kyira Wackett
  • Show Website
    Untethering Shame

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