Personal Kosmology

Devin Martin

Each episode of the podcast Personal Kosmology traces one seeker's journey: the beliefs they inherited, the experiences that broke them open, and the questions they're still living. I'm drawn to people who didn't just change their minds, but rebuilt their lives around what they found. In their stories, you may recognize your own.

Episodes

  1. 4d ago

    What Death Taught Alli Schaper About How to Live

    What happens when you stop looking outside yourself for the rules of how to live? Alli Schaper grew up wanting to do things right. She was religious, achievement-oriented, eager for approval, and eventually earned a master’s degree in accounting and became a CPA. But the path that looked right on paper slowly gave way to a much stranger one. Today, Alli is the co-founder and CEO of SuperMush, co-founder of the Microdosing Collective, host of Into the Multiverse, a psychedelic advocate, entrepreneur, and community builder. Her journey there was anything but linear. In this episode of Personal Kosmology, Alli traces the experiences that changed how she relates to her health, career, spirituality, relationships, and ultimately death. Years of chronic health problems first forced her to question how much of her own wisdom she had outsourced to experts. Functional medicine and functional mushrooms opened one door. Psychedelics opened another, challenging beliefs she had inherited about drugs, consciousness, and God. But one of the deepest transformations came through the sudden death of her father. That loss pushed Alli more directly into questions most of us spend our lives avoiding: What happens when we die? Why are we so afraid of death? And what might our relationship with death reveal about the way we are living? For Alli, mushrooms became more than a health product or psychedelic tool. They became a metaphor for life itself. In a forest, fungi break down dead matter and return its nutrients to the soil. Death becomes the raw material for new life. As Alli puts it: “Mushrooms are one of the best teachers ever of death.” Her story is also about learning what to do with the parts of ourselves that once seemed like liabilities. The desire to be liked became an ability to connect deeply with people. A love of partying and socializing evolved into building communities. Achievement and perfectionism became tools she could use rather than rules she had to obey. Networking ambition led her to a surprising conclusion after 360 coffee dates in a single year: success without meaningful relationships can leave you “alone on the yacht.” And the impulse to look outward for answers gradually became a willingness to trust direct experience. IN THIS EPISODE: • Growing up Lutheran and experiencing religion through fear and obligation• Alli’s extraordinary birth story involving her mother and aunt• Perfectionism, approval-seeking, and rebellion• Choosing college by Googling the #1 party school in America• Becoming a CPA and entering corporate consulting• Chronic health problems and getting off 12 pharmaceutical medications• Discovering functional mushrooms• Why she once believed psychedelics would “fry your brain”• The psychedelic experience that led her to quit modeling the next day• Reconnecting with God through direct experience• Inherited belief versus embodied knowing• What 360 coffee dates taught her about success and loneliness• Building SuperMush around mushrooms, lifestyle, and community• Microdosing and psychedelic advocacy• Experiencing psychedelics with her parents before her father died• Near-death experiences and the mystery of what happens after death• Why Western culture struggles to confront mortality• Death dinners, surrender, and learning to live with less fear• What fungi can teach us about decomposition, renewal, and life Alli does not offer a neat answer to what happens when we die. That may be the point. Her story is about becoming more willing to enter the questions directly, to trust what she experiences, and to allow mystery to change the way she lives. GUEST LINKS Alli Schaper: allischaper.comInstagram: @allischaperLinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/allischaperSuperMush: supermush.comMicrodosing Collective: microdosingcollective.org Into the Multiverse Podcast:Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/into-the-multiverse-podcast/id1590612760Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5HiGSnP57NisM8prbeHhQ4YouTube: youtube.com/channel/UCuHyvb1YxQygW-9yG66b6CwInstagram: @intothemultiverse Also from Alli: “Mushrooms Eat Death For Breakfast” can be found at allischaper.com. Welcome to the Personal Kosmology of Alli Schaper. Subscribe for more conversations with people whose experiences have forced them to reconsider what they believe about themselves, reality, and what it means to live a meaningful life.

    What Death Taught Alli Schaper About How to Live
  2. Aug 18

    From F-18 Pilot → UFO Expert | Ryan Graves

    Ryan Graves did not grow up dreaming about UFOs. He grew up in rural Massachusetts, reading science fiction, playing sports, questioning religion, and imagining the technological future. He studied aerospace engineering, became a Navy F/A-18 fighter pilot, and eventually found himself operating some of the most sophisticated aviation systems in the world. Then those systems started detecting things that were not supposed to be there. After a major radar upgrade, Ryan and other pilots began seeing unidentified objects operating inside military training airspace off the East Coast. The tracks appeared repeatedly. Multiple sensors confirmed that physical objects were present. Some hovered. Some moved at extraordinary speeds. Some seemed to operate in ways the pilots could not explain. Then another pilot came back from a flight shaken. He had nearly collided with one. His description: a dark gray or black cube inside a clear sphere. The object passed between two Navy jets and came roughly 50 feet from the cockpit of the lead aircraft. What followed is what makes Ryan's story so interesting to me. This is not the story of someone becoming convinced that aliens are visiting Earth. Ryan remains extremely careful about what the evidence does and does not allow him to conclude. It is the story of a person trained to trust data, make decisions under pressure, and distinguish signal from noise being forced to confront evidence that did not fit his model of reality. And then confronting something perhaps even harder: an institution that did not seem equipped to deal with it. Ryan eventually learned that multiple near misses had gone unreported. The objects continued appearing. Pilots altered training missions to avoid them. Years later, the 2017 New York Times story revealed that the problem had not simply been resolved somewhere higher up the chain of command. Ryan decided to speak. That decision eventually took him to the Pentagon, Congress, national media, and ultimately to founding Americans for Safe Aerospace, where he now works to build credible reporting systems for military pilots, commercial aviators, law enforcement, and others encountering anomalous phenomena. But this conversation goes much further than the sightings themselves. We talk about: • What Navy pilots actually see on radar and why the publicly released videos tell only a small part of the story• The near collision with the cube inside a sphere• Why multiple independent sensor systems matter• The stigma that kept pilots from reporting what they saw• What happened when Ryan tried to brief Congress• Why "unknown" does not mean "alien"• How to remain rigorous when evidence challenges your worldview• Epistemic humility and the discipline of not reacting too quickly to strange information• Reports involving consciousness, intuition, and anomalous experience• Extraterrestrial, ultraterrestrial, and other possible explanations• Whether advanced intelligence might understand physics and consciousness in ways we do not• Why Ryan had to recover some of the childlike comfort with mystery that his career as a fighter pilot had trained out of him One of my favorite ideas from the conversation is deceptively simple: We do not have to choose between believing extraordinary claims and dismissing them. There is another option. Pay attention. Gather evidence. Stay curious. Resist premature certainty. Ryan Graves has built a career around doing exactly that. Welcome to the Personal Kosmology of Ryan Graves.

    From F-18 Pilot → UFO Expert | Ryan Graves
  3. Aug 11

    From Investment Banker to Consciousness Researcher | Mark Gober

    What do you do when you achieve everything society tells you to want, only to realize it all feels hollow and meaningless? That is where Mark Gober found himself after Princeton, Division I athletics, and a successful career in finance. What came next was a radical rethinking of consciousness, meaning, success, and how to live. Mark Gober followed a path that looked almost impossibly successful from the outside. He went to Princeton, captained the Division I tennis team, entered the world of finance, and eventually became a partner at an investment firm focused on technology and intellectual property. He was also, by his own description, a materialist. Consciousness came from the brain. Psychic phenomena weren’t real. Spirituality was superstition. Life, ultimately, had no inherent meaning. Then he started looking at the evidence. What began as an intellectual curiosity turned into a much deeper confrontation with the assumptions underneath his life. Research into consciousness, near-death experiences, psychic phenomena, and the nature of reality pushed Mark toward a conclusion he never expected: the worldview he had inherited might be fundamentally incomplete. And if that was true, it wasn’t just an abstract philosophical problem. It meant reconsidering what mattered. It meant questioning the identity he had built around achievement. And eventually, it meant grieving the life he had spent pursuing. In this conversation, Mark and I trace that transformation from the inside out: from Princeton and Wall Street to consciousness research, from materialism to a participatory view of reality, and from accomplishment toward something much harder to quantify—love. We discuss: • Why success can become its own kind of trap• The assumptions hidden inside scientific materialism• The evidence that changed Mark’s mind about consciousness• Near-death experiences, psychic phenomena, and anomalous cognition• Why intelligent people often dismiss certain questions before examining the evidence• The difference between skepticism and dogmatism• What happens psychologically when your worldview begins to collapse• Why Mark came to believe that consciousness may be fundamental rather than produced by the brain• How a change in metaphysics can radically change the way you live• The cost of building an identity around professional achievement• Why Mark eventually had to “grieve” his old life• Love, meaning, and what becomes important when death is no longer understood as the end Mark Gober is the author of An End to Upside Down Thinking and a series of books examining consciousness, psychic phenomena, politics, health, and the assumptions underlying modern culture. This episode is not an argument that you should believe what Mark believes. It is an exploration of what can happen when someone is willing to follow a question far enough that the answer threatens the structure of his own identity. That is the territory of Personal Kosmology. Each episode traces one person’s journey: the beliefs they inherited, the experiences that transformed them, the questions at the edge of their thinking today, and how those changes have altered the way they live. By understanding how extraordinary people make sense of life, you may better understand how you make sense of your own. Welcome to the Personal Kosmology of Mark Gober. — ABOUT MARK GOBER Mark Gober is an author, researcher, and former finance professional whose work explores consciousness and the nature of reality. His first book, An End to Upside Down Thinking, examines evidence suggesting that consciousness may not be generated by the brain. He has since written extensively about related questions involving science, spirituality, health, politics, and human flourishing. — ABOUT PERSONAL KOSMOLOGY Personal Kosmology is a podcast about how people come to see the world the way they do. Host Devin Martin is an executive life coach who has spent nearly two decades studying human transformation from the inside out. Each conversation explores a guest’s intellectual, psychological, and spiritual development—not simply what they believe, but how they got there. Subscribe for conversations with scientists, entrepreneurs, philosophers, artists, spiritual practitioners, researchers, and other people willing to question the maps they were given. 🌐 personalkosmology.com

Ratings & Reviews

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About

Each episode of the podcast Personal Kosmology traces one seeker's journey: the beliefs they inherited, the experiences that broke them open, and the questions they're still living. I'm drawn to people who didn't just change their minds, but rebuilt their lives around what they found. In their stories, you may recognize your own.