Most moms I talk to are running on empty and still showing up for everyone else first. But what if feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, and responsible for everyone isn’t actually the price of being a good mom? In this episode of Successful with ADHD, I’m joined by Heather Chauvin, leadership coach, TEDx speaker, host of Emotionally Uncomfortable, and author of Dying to Be a Good Mother. After being diagnosed with stage four cancer at 28 while raising three boys, Heather was forced to rethink how she was living, parenting, and using her energy. Heather and I get into ADHD, motherhood, burnout, emotional regulation, boundaries, executive functioning, and the invisible mental load so many women carry. We talk about what happens when you stop being everyone else’s executive function, why letting your kids struggle can actually help them build independence, and how operating from the energy you want to feel can change your relationships. I also share a deeply personal part of my own story and what happened when I finally started stepping back. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything and somehow still failing, press play on this one. Episode Highlights [0:45] - Meet Heather Chauvin and hear how a stage four cancer diagnosis changed the way she approached motherhood and life. [2:19] - Heather shares the internal shift that made her decide she was no longer willing to feel depleted. [4:10] - Facing fear, survival mode, motherhood, business, and cancer all at the same time. [6:39] - The difference between simply coping and asking yourself how you actually want to live. [8:29] - Why getting another planner or writing another to-do list won’t fix an identity built around doing everything for everyone. [12:20] - Looking beyond ADHD and other labels to recognize our basic human needs for regulation, nourishment, movement, and connection. [17:02] - Heather breaks down Energetic Time Management and her powerful “Wouldn’t it be nice if…” practice. [21:11] - Holding boundaries with ADHD kids without rescuing, controlling, or falling into a guilt spiral. [23:04] - Why emotional discomfort can feel horrible at first—and why yelling can actually be a stress response. [28:21] - I open up about nearly getting divorced, carrying the executive functioning of my household, and what changed when I finally stepped back. [30:45] - The fine line between helping, rescuing, codependence, and interdependence. [34:54] - Getting the mental load out of your brain and allowing other people to take responsibility—even when they do things differently. [36:22] - ADHD executive functioning, independence, and why letting our kids fail can be an important part of helping them grow. [37:17] - Moving through shame, regulating your nervous system, and creating the accountability your brain actually needs. [41:12] - Collaborative problem-solving: asking kids what their brains need instead of assuming we have all the answers. [43:08] - Why Heather believes the more responsibility you have, the lighter you should feel. [47:49] - Delaying difficult conversations, using ADHD-friendly communication strategies, and knowing when it’s better to text, write, or walk. [50:02] - Heather leaves overwhelmed moms with one belief she wants them to stop carrying. Links and Resources Heather Chauvin is a leadership advisor for high-performing women raising children and building lives that demand more than conventional time management can hold. Her work sits at an unusual intersection: Trained as a Social Worker, she spent the early part of her career inside the systems most of her clients are now navigating from the other side (schools, mental health services, family courts, the quiet machinery that shapes how children, especially neurodiverse children, are seen and supported). That lens still informs everything. She knows what's happening underneath the surface of a family, a marriage, a woman holding it all together. What she layers on top is lived. A stage 4 cancer diagnosis at 28, while raising three young sons and building a career. A TEDx stage. A book — Dying to Be a Good Mother. A podcast with more than 11 million downloads. Years of working privately with executives, founders, and mothers who look successful on paper and feel quietly depleted underneath. Her clients describe her as the advisor in their back pocket, someone who can hold the strategic conversation and the spiritual one in the same breath. The cash flow plan and the question of what makes you feel alive. The team restructure and the marriage or health diagnosis. The next career move and the child who needs you to show up differently than you were taught to. The throughline is this: The more responsibility you carry, the lighter you should feel. Heather has spent 15+ years proving it's possible — for herself, and for the women she works with privately. https://www.instagram.com/heatherchauvin_/ Thank you for tuning into "SuccessFULL with ADHD." If this episode has impacted you, remember to rate, follow, share, and review our podcast. Your support helps us reach and help more individuals navigating their journeys with ADHD. 🚨Calling all aspiring Student ADHD coaches ▶️ https://www.coachingwithbrooke.com/student-coach-training Help your clients break free from paralysis and better manage their life with 3C Activation® coach training! 💥Gain a proven process for ADHD coaching 💥Earn 38 ICF Credits 💥Learn the latest neuroscience to boost your practice 💥Qualify to be listed under ACO Directory Learn more ▶️ https://www.coachingwithbrooke.com/student-coach-training
