The Calm Confidence Podcast: Social Anxiety and Being Yourself

Charles Perry
  • 5.0 (14)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

Social anxiety sucks. I am a former social anxiety sufferer who has worked as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for 10+ years. I combine my personal and professional experience to give you practical tools to help you face your fears and become a more confident and authentic you. Email questions/topics to: info@csplcsw.com Newsletter and Services: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence Disclaimer: This is NOT Therapy and is not a replacement for therapy. Listening to this podcast does not constitute a client/therapist relationship.

  1. 1d ago

    Surviving Our Monsters w/ Author Bridey Thelen-Heidel

    Episode description Warning: This episode explores themes of trauma and abuse. What happens to the stories we never tell? For Bridey Thelen-Heidel, holding them in for decades took a real toll on her body. Writing them down became the way she started to heal. Bridey has been a high school English teacher for 27 years. She’s also a TEDx speaker and the author of the award-winning memoir Bright Eyes, a story about surviving our monsters and then learning how to live without them. The book won a Zibby Award for Best Story of Overcoming, a NYC Big Book Award and a San Francisco Book Festival Award. Her advocacy for LGBT+ youth has been recognized by the California Teachers Association. In this episode, we talk about trauma, bravery, and what it takes to finally tell the truth about your life. Bridey shares how she wrote Bright Eyes over five years without knowing where to start, but discovered her freedom and truth even when others tried to deny it. While this conversation may not discuss social anxiety, as my episodes often do, I believe this is an incredible story of bravery and vulnerability that I hope can be inspiring to you listeners. Connect with Bridey Website: https://bridey-thelenheidel.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brighteyesauthor/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bridey.heidelTEDx Talk, “ROB the Trauma: Steal Back Your Life”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PT6rvXyjsZU Bridey also offers developmental editing for memoir writers with an early draft, and she joins book clubs over Zoom to talk about Bright Eyes. You can reach her through her website.

  2. Oct 10

    How To Stop Appeasing Others

    Appeasing others is at the core of social anxiety. It is also short lived and never solves the deeper problem within. The very attempt to get appease and get approval reminds us we still need it, which makes us feel inferior to others. In this episode I explore how to give yourself permission to express yourself and take risks. We must learn and replace our overt and subtle attempts to get approval from others, and begin to express ourselves despite the possibility for rejection and ridicule. Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course Want To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

  3. Sep 20

    How To Figure Out Who You Are

    Don’t you hate when people tell you to just be yourself? “Just express yourself and you’ll find your people,” is what they tell you. The problem is you don’t know who you are. This is a common problem for those of use who struggle with our confidence. On this episode I explore how our fear causes us to be dishonest with ourselves and others, which leads to this identity confusion. Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course Want To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

  4. Aug 31

    People Are Judging You

    When my social anxiety was at it's worst, people would try to convince me that it was all in my head; that no one was thinking about me as much as I thought they were. And for a while I thought this would help. I tried to convince myself that no one was looking, staring or judging. But this never made me feel any better because I was always worried about the "what ifs." "But what if they are looking at me, then what do I do?" The reality is we cannot overcome a fear by convincing ourselves the thing we are afraid of is impossible, because it never is. When we are thinking like this, we are still thinking from a state of fear. We want to eventually get to a point where we accept that judgment is possible, but we can be ok with that.Other relevant episodes: How To Actually Not Care What People Think: https://spotifycreators-web.app.link/e/pq9mOJLL35b How To Actually Be Yourself: https://spotifycreators-web.app.link/e/dJu0THLL35bInterested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-courseWant To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

  5. Aug 11

    Stop Justifying Your Social Anxiety

    In today’s episode we explore how our mind convinces us that avoidance is a good thing. When we are really anxious we start to truly believe that social interactions are inherently dangerous, weird or awkward. The truth is they just FEEL that way. We need to teach our brain that we can handle more than we think, and it’s time we stop justifying our fears. Interested in working with me? https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence Social Anxiety Course (50% Off with the Code: August): https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course Social Anxiety Mini Workbook (FREE): https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/digital_downloads/minibook

  6. Jul 23

    Stop Trying To Be Yourself

    "Just Be Yourself." The worst advice known to man for social anxiety. Despite knowing how unhelpful this is, we can often find ourselves trying to be more "ourself." However, this desire often leads to more obsessiveness, rumination and perfectionism. It is performance rather than being. Instead we need to lower our standards. We need to understand what we can and cannot do at this given time with our anxiety, and give ourselves flexible expectations so we can see progress. Your "true" self may emerge once you stop fixating on it, or maybe it won't. But maybe it doesn't matter. Other relevant episodes: How To Actually Be Yourself: https://open.spotify.com/episode/7qxdc1vSia5PXnvrnlTasQ?si=2ADoYuFOQXWlCq3--jBzwA How To Like Yourself: https://open.spotify.com/episode/67AfJBOLvae9n6hENlbiDx?si=GWeNKg5oSuKbcVZwlpR1MQ Are You Faking It? https://open.spotify.com/episode/6QgK3oPAOXg8RFWvggrUxB?si=qE-Yv5wxToSYygftIJTfKg Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-courseWant To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

  7. Jul 13

    Overcoming Fear or Public Speaking w/Special Guest

    In today's episode I talk about overcoming the fear of public speaking with Mona, who also goes by Babystepstothemic on TikTok and Instagram. Mona has amassed over 170K followers on Instagram and over 60K on TikTok over the past 6 months, by sharing videos of her journey to overcoming her fear of public speaking. In this episode we explore what sparked this journey and what she has learned along the way about her self and overcoming her fear. She has also developed a 14 day "Off The Cuff Challenge" for anyone interested in challenging themselves to face their fears. She has created a website that creates a random topic automatically so you can build your skills to speaking off the cuff about anything! Interested in joining the challenge? Sign up here: https://www.offthecuffspeech.com/#try-it You can also follow Mona on instagram and Tiktok: Insta: https://www.instagram.com/babystepstothemic?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw== TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@babystepstothemic?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc

  8. Jul 5

    The Truth About Social Rejection (And Why You've Got It All Wrong)

    What if rejection isn't actually rejection? In this episode, we break down why it feels like getting rejected is often just incompatibility that we've learned to take personally. When you wear a mask to avoid disapproval, you're not protecting yourself, you're just working harder to be liked by people who were never going to be your people anyway. We talk about why being authentic feels so risky, what actually happens when someone doesn't like the real you, and why fitting in is never the solution. If you've every shrunk or edited yourself to avoid being rejected, this episode is for you. Related episodes: Why You Can't Make Friends: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5xfQVrwWpaydjdDJXSD6qf?si=qKBWqPqrT8O-BW6ypW82Xw How To Like Yourself: https://open.spotify.com/episode/67AfJBOLvae9n6hENlbiDx?si=GWeNKg5oSuKbcVZwlpR1MQ How To Actually Be Yourself: https://open.spotify.com/episode/7qxdc1vSia5PXnvrnlTasQ?si=hGW6EOsXTRWXbVzivazvaw Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course Want To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

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5
out of 5
14 Ratings

About

Social anxiety sucks. I am a former social anxiety sufferer who has worked as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for 10+ years. I combine my personal and professional experience to give you practical tools to help you face your fears and become a more confident and authentic you. Email questions/topics to: info@csplcsw.com Newsletter and Services: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence Disclaimer: This is NOT Therapy and is not a replacement for therapy. Listening to this podcast does not constitute a client/therapist relationship.

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