Chris and Jen in the Morning: Self-Care Conversations on Personal Growth, Happiness, and How Our Brains Work

ChrisandJenITM
  • 5.0 (9)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Two friends with a podcast about gratitude, self-care, personal growth, and finding happiness - all with a side of levity and laughter.Long-distance friends, we shorten the miles between DFW and NYC in our weekly podcast where we focus on self care, seeking happiness, and trying to live our best life. We add in a splash of neuroscience and talk about what happens in our brains, why we feel and react the way we do, and how to live better, more authentic, more fulfilling, happier lives. In our middle-life years, we decided to share our conversations about adulting, chasing joy, being part of the LGBTQ+ community, parenting, personal growth, awkwardness, anxiety, mental health, and so much more to help others who can relate find kinship and a sense of community. Ready to live your best life (and laugh along the way)? Subscribe and join us on our journey through life together.#growth #wittywisdom #storytelling #podcast #friends #selfcare #motivation #inspiration #happiness 

  1. 2d ago ·  Video

    Why Do We Laugh? The Science of Laughter

    In this episode of Chris and Jen in the Morning, hosts Chris and Jen explore the complex mechanics, evolutionary roots, and social significance of human laughter. Beginning with a lighthearted celebration of Chris's birthday and reflections on vacation memories, the conversation shifts to why humans laugh—not just at jokes, but during moments of stress, nervousness, and social awkwardness. They unpack how laughter acts as a tool for emotional regulation, social bonding, and co-regulation. Three Pivotal Points: Laughter Beyond Humor: Laughter is not governed by a single "laughter center" in the brain; rather, it emerges from different neural pathways. Spontaneous emotional laughter involves subcortical circuitry, while voluntary or performative laughter relies on cortical motor systems. Consequently, laughter often functions as an emotional regulation mechanism during high-arousal or awkward situations rather than simply indicating happiness. Evolutionary and Social Bonding: Research highlights that laughter serves as a key mechanism for social signaling, co-regulation, and group cohesion. Over 65 animal species (including primates, dolphins, and rats) use laugh-like vocalizations during play. In humans, shared laughter and inside jokes build unique relationship boundaries and non-physical bonds. Adult Laughter vs. Childlike Abandon: While laughter isn't a direct "cure-all," it can lower cortisol levels and trigger dopamine release within the brain's reward system. As people age, stress, self-monitoring, and social expectations often reduce their willingness to laugh freely. Reclaiming childlike presence requires actively giving oneself permission to relax and prioritize joy. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - https://www.fabulousfavoritefinds.com/ Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Chapters 00:00 Introduction to the Psychology and Science of Laughter 00:19 Introduction to the social and biological importance of laughter 02:35 Why Humans Laugh and Its Social Significance 03:02 The evolutionary roots of laughter in humans and animals 04:38 The Role of Laughter in Building Community and Connection 07:01 How laughter signals safety and builds social bonds 09:19 Gratitude and Self-Recognition in Life Experiences 12:00 The role of humor in reducing stress and boosting dopamine 12:12 The Complex Behavior of Laughter and Its Neural Pathways 15:58 Childlike laughter and how stress inhibits spontaneous joy 16:11 Nervous Laughter and Social Contexts 19:21 The Brain's Prediction Machine and Humor 19:59 The contagious nature of laughter and emotional contagion 24:20 Why We Fake Laughter and Its Emotional Implications 24:52 Laughter as a vulnerability and a sign of trust 28:52 Benign Violations and Humor Theory 29:59 Practical ways to incorporate more laughter into daily life 33:19 The Physical and Emotional Effects of Genuine Laughter 34:59 The cultural shift in parenting and permission to laugh 40:08 The science of laughter in animals and its evolutionary significance 45:11 How social media influences mimicry and laughter 49:50 The importance of humor in health and recovery 54:57 Closing thoughts: laughter as a fundamental human experience Support the show

    Why Do We Laugh? The Science of Laughter

  2. Sep 10 ·  Video

    Rethinking Your Self-Worth & Internal Scorecard

    In this episode of Chris and Jen in the Morning, Chris and Jen dive into a candid conversation about self-worth, identity, and the subconscious "scorecards" people use to measure their value in daily life. They unpack how external factors like career accomplishments, physical appearance, intellect, and social expectations often trap people into believing their value must be earned. By identifying how brain mechanics like negativity bias and comparison drive these feelings, they offer practical insights on taking control back, redefining personal success, and recognizing that human worth is foundational rather than situational. Three Pivotal Points: The Origin of the Personal Scorecard: Society, family dynamics, and early school environments condition us to link our value to metrics like grades, titles, looks, and productivity. Negativity Bias and the Comparison Trap: Our brains naturally dwell on single negative criticisms over praise and use other people as reference points, making self-worth feel contingent on constant performance. Worth is Foundational, Not Earned: Making a mistake doesn't make you a failure, and being rejected doesn't make you undesirable; true worth exists independently of external achievements or other people's approval. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Chapters 00:00 Introduction to the concept of self-worth and societal scorecards 02:02 The origins of our internal and societal scorecards 07:25 How we measure our value and the influence of childhood conditioning 12:33 The impact of societal and cultural norms on self-esteem 20:15 The role of comparison and societal standards in shaping self-worth 26:52 Understanding the brain's wiring and the influence of negativity bias 33:10 The spiral of negative self-talk and how to interrupt it 39:19 The importance of intentionality and redefining your scorecard 50:58 Practical steps to assess and change your internal scorecard 01:02:21 The power of reflection, curiosity, and self-awareness 01:09:24 The distinction between worth and achievement 01:11:36 Encouragement to share personal journeys and insights Support the show

    Rethinking Your Self-Worth & Internal Scorecard

  3. Sep 3 ·  Video

    Balancing Novelty and Familiarity in Life

    This episode explores why humans simultaneously crave predictability and new experiences, reframing the tension between familiarity and novelty not as a contradiction, but as a healthy biological balance. Chris and Jen break down how our brains use routine for safety while seeking small "sparks" of novelty to stimulate learning and focus. Through personal anecdotes—ranging from game progression and hotel review anxiety to opposite-hand toothbrushing—they provide actionable ways to refresh your life without overhauling it. Pivotal Points: Familiarity Serves as an Anchor: The brain functions as a prediction machine; routines and familiar environments lower cognitive demand, create stability, and reduce anxiety. Novelty Drives Dopamine and Learning: New experiences engage the hippocampus and dopamine systems, signaling the brain to pay attention, adapt, and update its predictive model. Micro-Changes Over Life Overhauls: Satiating boredom doesn't require drastic choices like quitting a job or moving; small injections of novelty (like taking a new route or taking a class) provide the optimal balance of safety and excitement. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Chapters 00:00 Introduction to the craving for familiarity and novelty 01:53 Personal stories of gaming and routines 04:03 The paradox of craving both comfort and excitement 05:53 Gratitude moments and personal reflections 12:00 The science of prediction and prediction error 19:57 The role of dopamine in learning and motivation 27:46 Balancing predictability and surprise in life 34:10 Strategies for managing change and routine Support the show

    Balancing Novelty and Familiarity in Life

  4. Aug 27 ·  Video

    Is Crying Self-Care? The Science of Emotional Release

    In this episode of Chris and Jen in the Morning, Chris and Jen discuss the concept of having a "good cry" and examine whether crying serves as a meaningful form of self-care. They unpack the physiological and emotional impacts of crying, discussing how society conditions us to view tears, how sad media helps process difficult feelings, and how to create supportive spaces for emotional vulnerability. Biological & Stress Release Benefits: Crying physically releases stress-related hormones like cortisol and triggers parasympathetic regulation (a vagal rebound), which helps calm and balance the body. Safe Processing via Media: Seeking out sad movies, books, or songs allows individuals to process complex emotions like grief or nostalgia at a safe, controlled distance. Social Connection & Vulnerability: Tears act as a signal for social soothing, but societal conditioning often causes people to associate crying with weakness or discomfort, making space for non-judgmental support essential. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Chapters 00:00 Introduction to the psychology of crying 01:56 Personal stories and gratitude moments 04:52 The concept of a good cry and societal perceptions 06:56 Different types of tears and their meanings 09:47 The science behind crying and emotional regulation 14:52 How vulnerability and support impact emotional health 20:08 Cultural rituals around grief and mourning 24:46 The biological and hormonal aspects of crying 29:59 The role of music, movies, and stories in emotional processing 34:46 The paradox of sad music and emotional pleasure 39:59 Why society stigmatizes crying and how to change that 44:58 Practical tips for embracing vulnerability and supporting others 01:00:11 Summary and final thoughts on emotional self-care Support the show

    Is Crying Self-Care? The Science of Emotional Release

  5. Aug 20 ·  Video

    Living Resiliently: Action Steps for Growth

    In Part 2, Chris and Jen transition from the theory of resilience into actionable daily practice. Rejecting the romanticization of trauma and toxic positivity, they discuss how controlled exposure to manageable challenges acts as a "stress inoculation" to build confidence. They detail five practical tools for cultivating agency—regulating, moving, reframing, connecting, and finding meaning—and reframe resilience as the willingness to adapt, rest, set boundaries, and seek help. Three Pivotal Points: Rejecting the Romanticization of Trauma: Suffering is not required for growth, and trauma is not a gift. Hardships do not need to be justified with phrases like "everything happens for a reason"; rather, controlled, manageable stressors act like a "mental vaccine" to help us develop coping capacity. Five Practical Resilience Building Tools: Resilience can be strengthened using five specific strategies: Regulate (calm your nervous system before problem-solving), Move (physical activity promotes brain-derived neurotrophic factor), Reframe (ask "what else could be true?"), Connect (lean on community), and Find Meaning (ground yourself in what matters). Resilience as Adaptation, Not Persistence: Resilience is not simply powering through or handling everything alone. True adaptation often means taking a break, setting firm boundaries, accepting help from your circle, changing direction, or even knowing when to quit. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Support the show

    Living Resiliently: Action Steps for Growth

  6. Aug 13 ·  Video

    What Is Real Resilience? Adapt, Learn & Grow

    In Part 1 of this deep dive into resilience, Chris and Jen challenge the traditional belief that resilience simply means "bouncing back" or being tough enough that nothing hurts. Exploring the neuroscience behind stress and neuroplasticity, they reveal how the brain’s amygdala, prefrontal cortex, and hippocampus work together to adapt to life’s challenges. They redefine resilience as an ongoing process of recovery and adaptation—rather than emotional suppression—and explore how "ordinary magic" and supportive connections allow us to thrive despite past adversity. Three Pivotal Points: Resilience vs. Emotional Suppression: Resilience is not a fixed personality trait or a measure of how well you can suppress your emotions. Resilient people still experience stress, exhaustion, and sadness; resilience is about how you adapt and recover afterward.The Neuroplasticity of Adaptation: The brain is not a finished product; through neuroplasticity, it creates new neural pathways in response to stress and learning. The amygdala (threat detection), prefrontal cortex (regulation and planning), and hippocampus (context) form a internal "resilience team" that helps navigate adversity.The Power of "Ordinary Magic": Genetics and early environments set our initial baseline, but they do not determine our permanent future. Small, supportive human interactions, positive relationships, and acts of kindness—termed "ordinary magic"—can actively shape our brain's capacity to heal and grow. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Chapters 00:00 Introduction: What is resilience and why it matters 03:56 The influence of societal messages and personal perceptions 08:54 Are you truly resilient or just good at pretending? 09:36 The cultural definition of resilience: toughness and emotional suppression 12:22 Resilience includes vulnerability, crying, and asking for help 16:22 Myths about resilience: bouncing back and personality traits 18:30 Resilience as a process, not a fixed trait 22:19 The impact of social media and information overload on resilience 23:17 Neuroplasticity and the brain's capacity to adapt 27:03 The brain's resilience team: amygdala, prefrontal cortex, hippocampus 30:40 Managing stress responses and trauma with resilience 33:11 The science behind trauma, PTSD, and resilience 36:32 Why resilience is essential for happiness and well-being 41:16 Resilience as a skill that can be cultivated and practiced 45:35 Genetics, environment, and the capacity to develop resilience 50:23 The concept of ordinary magic and small acts of kindness 52:30 The influence of supportive relationships and community 56:02 The power of small acts and everyday kindness 58:11 The lasting impact of childhood experiences and role models 58:46 Conclusion: Embracing resilience as a communal and personal journey Support the show

    What Is Real Resilience? Adapt, Learn & Grow

  7. Aug 6 ·  Video

    Top Ten list of self-care and life tips for a happier, more grounded life

    In this vault episode of Chris and Jen in the Morning, the hosts curate a countdown of the top 10 self-care strategies and life tips designed to protect your mental energy and navigate daily chaos. Covering everything from neuroscience-backed sleep science to emotional awareness, the discussion offers actionable ways to cultivate internal stability, set boundaries without seeking permission, and build meaningful connections. Three Pivotal Points: Practicing Agency and Energy Ownership: External situations may be out of your control, but you retain full choice over how you process feelings, set boundaries, and show up.Emotional Awareness via "Name It to Tame It": Labeling emotions pulls the brain out of a reactive threat response, allowing you to acknowledge feelings like anger or sadness without judgement before choosing a path forward.Sleep as Non-Negotiable Biological Maintenance: Sleep debt cannot simply be "caught up on" on weekends due to time-locked circadian rhythms and the brain's nightly non-REM waste-clearing cycles. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Music licensed through Soundstripe. Code: ATKOBS4HCUCTWF8P Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Practice Agency and Own Your Energy: Recognize that while you cannot control external events, you have the power to choose your internal energy. Remind yourself that you are in the driver's seat of your life, and you can intentionally choose to show up with kindness or calm even when the world feels heavy. Episode: Feeling Overwhelmed: Self-Forgiveness and Coping ToolsUse "Name It to Tame It" for Awareness: The first step toward regulation is acknowledging what you are actually feeling. By labeling an emotion—such as fear, anger, or anxiety—you turn down the intensity and move your brain from a reactive threat mode into a more reflective state. Episode:  Feeling Overwhelmed: Self-Forgiveness and Coping Tools (referenced across multiple episodes)Set and Maintain Firm Boundaries: Boundaries are a vital act of self-preservation and self-care. Learn to say "no" without providing excessive justifications or seeking permission to protect your peace. This includes setting "emotional boundaries" where you refuse to own other people's feelings at the expense of your own. Episode: Finding Peace: How to Set Boundaries in Real Life - Part One and Part TwoTrade Perfection for Effectiveness: Perfectionism is often a "trap" or a threat response that robs you of joy. Apply the 80% rule: realize that 80% completed often beats 100% imagined, and focus on what is "finishable" and "effective" rather than an unachievable standard. Episode: Perfection Is a Trap: How It Hurts Your Mental HealthUtilize Grounding and Sensory Skills: To pull yourself out of an "anxiety loop," engage your senses. Use the 5-4-3-2-1 method (naming things you see, hear, feel, smell, and taste) or physical tools like cold water or walking to reconnect with the present moment and deactivate the fight-or-flight response. Episode: Grounding Skills: How to Live in the PresentPrioritize Sleep as Biological Maintenance: View sleep as a "nightly maintenance crew" that repairs cells, files memories, and washes metabolic waste out of the brain. Avoid the "hustle" lie that you can catch up later; consistent rest is required for emotional regulation and long-term brain health. Episode: Why Your Brain Needs Sleep: The Science of RestCurate Your Inputs and Media Intake: Audit what you consume to protect your nervous system from being "rage-baited" by algorithms. Practice objective curiosity by asking if you truly understand a piece of information or if you are just agreeing with it to support your existing bias. Episode: Navigating Information with Objective Curiosity and How Representation Helps Us See What is PossibleFocus on Micro Changes and Celebrate Effort: Instead of trying to "boil the ocean" with massive overhauls, focus on small, manageable shifts. Celebrate your effort and hitting small milestones (moving from A to B) rather than waiting until you reach the final result (Z) to find satisfaction. Episode: Feeling Stuck Already? How to Reset Through Micro ChangesAlign Life with Your Core Values: Identify your core values—your "constellations"—to orient yourself during times of uncertainty. When your decisions are rooted in values like dignity, integrity, or connection rather than specific outcomes, you build greater resilience and suffer less stress. Episode: How to Define Your Personal Values for a Happier Life and Hope, Resilience, and Real LifeCultivate a "Chosen Family": Since the human brain is wired for connection, surround yourself with people who celebrate your authentic self rather than those who require you to hide parts of who you are. Seek out safe spaces where you can "unzip" your guard and find a soft place to land. Episode: How Chosen Family Helps Us Heal and Grow TogetherSupport the show

    Top Ten list of self-care and life tips for a happier, more grounded life

  8. Jul 30 ·  Video

    Ask Ace - Everyday Questions with Surprising Answers

    In this episode of Chris and Jen they ‘Ask Ace.’ Chris and Jen tackle a series of intriguing questions and everyday mysteries with help from Ace. The team breaks down the science, history, and surprising facts behind everyday items and long-held debates. 3 Pivotal Points: The Straw Manufacturing & Hole Debate: Ace explains that plastic straws are extruded through a single die, meaning topologically they contain only one continuous hole, sparking a lively debate on definitions.The Truth About GMO Fruits & Veggies: The group explores how genetic modification works at the DNA level, why crops are modified for pest resistance and higher yields, and why GMO foods are safe for human consumption.The Origin of the Woodchuck Tongue Twister: Ace shares the history of the famous "woodchuck" rhyme, tracing its roots to early speech therapy for "lead-tongued" speakers and a 1902 play, along with an MIT professor's calculation that a woodchuck could chuck about 700 pounds of wood. Website - www.chrisandjenitm.com Email - connect@chrisandjenitm.com    Voicemail and Text available at 940-278-8129 Merch - https://chris-and-jen-itm.printify.me/ Store - fabfavefinds.etsy.com Intro and Outro Music ‘Vienna Beats’ By RadioPink, Blue Dots Sessions Licensed under a Attribution Non-Commercial License Support the show

    Ask Ace - Everyday Questions with Surprising Answers
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About

Two friends with a podcast about gratitude, self-care, personal growth, and finding happiness - all with a side of levity and laughter.Long-distance friends, we shorten the miles between DFW and NYC in our weekly podcast where we focus on self care, seeking happiness, and trying to live our best life. We add in a splash of neuroscience and talk about what happens in our brains, why we feel and react the way we do, and how to live better, more authentic, more fulfilling, happier lives. In our middle-life years, we decided to share our conversations about adulting, chasing joy, being part of the LGBTQ+ community, parenting, personal growth, awkwardness, anxiety, mental health, and so much more to help others who can relate find kinship and a sense of community. Ready to live your best life (and laugh along the way)? Subscribe and join us on our journey through life together.#growth #wittywisdom #storytelling #podcast #friends #selfcare #motivation #inspiration #happiness 

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