Overstimulated and Over It: A Podcast for Women in Perimenopause with ADHD

Blair Pfeiffer, LCHMC, CST
  • 5.0 (9)
  • Self-Improvement

Overstimulated and Over It is the podcast for women in perimenopause with ADHD who have been told they are too sensitive, too emotional, too intense and are finally realizing the world has just been too loud. Hosted by Blair Pfeiffer, ADHD and perimenopause coach, licensed mental health therapist, and certified sex therapist, this show explores the messy, beautiful intersection of hormones, neurodivergence, and the highly sensitive nervous system. Because you were never too much. You were just under-supported.

  1. 5d ago

    My Libido Has Been Ghosting Me: The Strange Case of the Missing Midlife Sex Drive

    Where the hell did my libido go? One day she was here. The next? Ghosted. No text. No explanation. No forwarding address. In this spooky-season episode of Overstimulated and Over It, Blair puts on both her sex therapist and fellow perimenopausal ADHD human hats to talk about one of the most complicated changes many women experience in midlife: desire suddenly feeling very, very different. Because libido isn’t just about hormones, and wanting sex isn’t always as simple as feeling spontaneously turned on. ADHD, perimenopause, stress, sensory overload, medications, body changes, relationship dynamics, sleep, pressure, and the mental load can all affect how we experience desire and intimacy. Blair explores the difference between spontaneous and responsive desire, why an ADHD brain may need time to transition from “household administrator” to “sexual human,” and how sensory overload can follow you straight into the bedroom. She also talks about physical changes that can affect arousal, comfort, lubrication, orgasm, and pleasure during perimenopause, plus what can happen in relationships when touch starts to feel like a contract for sex. And then there’s the bigger question: What if the goal isn’t getting your old libido back? Maybe it’s getting curious about the sexual person you are now. What feels good now? What kind of connection do you want? What does your body need? What happens when you take pressure and obligation out of the equation and make room for curiosity, communication, pleasure, and play again? If you’ve ever thought, “I love you, but please don’t touch me right now,” wondered why sex rarely crosses your mind anymore, or worried that changes in desire mean something is wrong with you or your relationship, this conversation is for you. Your libido may not be dead. Maybe she’s just haunting a different house now. For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com⁠ For resources, program information, or to join The Side Quest Club: https://withme.so/blairpfeiffercoaching ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    My Libido Has Been Ghosting Me: The Strange Case of the Missing Midlife Sex Drive

  2. Oct 13

    The Conversation Graveyard: When the Words You Practiced Disappear on Contact

    Ever rehearse a difficult conversation perfectly in your head, only to have every useful word disappear the second the other person is actually standing in front of you? In this spooky-season episode, Blair explores the very real communication struggles that can show up when ADHD, emotional activation, rejection sensitivity, working memory challenges, and perimenopause all collide. From blanking out in doctor’s appointments to overexplaining texts, saying yes when you desperately mean no, losing the original point halfway through an argument, and coming up with the perfect response six hours too late, Blair shares why communication can become especially difficult when your nervous system is overwhelmed. She also talks about the pressure so many women feel to communicate perfectly, avoid disappointing anyone, manage everyone else’s reactions, and somehow find the magical sentence that guarantees nobody gets upset. Spoiler: that sentence does not exist. Instead, Blair offers a more realistic approach to communication built around slowing things down, writing down what you actually want to say, supporting your working memory, choosing better timing, listening to the words instead of the story anxiety is creating, and learning to tolerate the fact that someone else can be disappointed without that automatically meaning you did something wrong. This episode is also a reminder that healthy communication isn’t about never getting defensive, emotional, or saying something badly. It’s about being able to come back, repair, clarify, and take responsibility for your part without taking responsibility for everything. If you have a conversation haunting you right now, maybe you don’t need the perfect speech. Maybe you just need one honest sentence. And yes, shaky voices still count. If this episode resonated with you, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another woman who has ever overthought a text, forgotten every question at the doctor’s office, or wondered why she said yes when every cell in her body was screaming no. To learn more about The Emotionally Organized Woman, join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community, and explore additional resources, check out the links below. For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com⁠ ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    The Conversation Graveyard: When the Words You Practiced Disappear on Contact

  3. Oct 8 ·  Bonus

    Tales from the Crypt: The Scent of Aging Flesh

    Apparently, turning 40 comes with a fun little surprise nobody bothered to mention: our skin chemistry can actually change the way we smell. In this spooky-season bonus episode, we’re going down the deeply unsettling rabbit hole of “old person smell.” Is it actually real? What the hell is 2-nonenal? Why does it start showing up as we age? And most importantly, why is everyone suddenly talking about persimmon soap? We’ll get into the actual science, what we know (and don’t know), and whether persimmon soap belongs in the category of miracle internet b******t or… probably not b******t. Because apparently wrinkles, rogue chin hairs, and declining estrogen weren’t enough. Welcome to Tales from the Crypt: The Scent of Aging Flesh. To learn more about The Emotionally Organized Woman, join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community, and explore additional resources, check out the links below. For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com Join The Side Quest Club Find some amazing resources here ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    Tales from the Crypt: The Scent of Aging Flesh

  4. Oct 6

    Ghosts I Can Handle. Fluorescent Lights Are Another Story: When Lights, Sounds, Smells, and People Are Suddenly Too Much

    Haunted houses? Fun. Ghost stories? Bring them on. Fluorescent lights, crowded grocery stores, scratchy clothing, strong perfume, and someone chewing too loudly? Now that’s terrifying. In this spooky-season episode, Blair dives into the very real experience of sensory overwhelm and why so many women with ADHD find that perimenopause turns the volume up on everything. From bright lights and buzzing noises to uncomfortable clothing, strong smells, and constant interruptions, she explores what it feels like when your nervous system simply has too much information to process. Through personal stories (including an unforgettable office fish incident), humor, and practical insight, Blair explains why sensory sensitivity isn’t about being “too sensitive” or dramatic. It’s about having a brain that processes the world differently, especially when hormonal changes, stress, and poor sleep leave your nervous system with fewer resources than it once had. Rather than trying to push through overwhelm, Blair encourages listeners to start noticing what their nervous system is actually asking for. Sometimes relief doesn’t come from changing everything. It comes from making one small adjustment that helps your brain feel just a little bit safer. If you’ve ever abandoned a shopping trip because the lights were too bright, the store was too loud, or your nervous system simply tapped out, this episode will remind you that you’re far from alone. If this episode resonated with you, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another woman who’s ever wondered why Costco feels like a haunted house but actual haunted houses somehow feel less overwhelming. To learn more about The Emotionally Organized Woman, join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community, and explore additional resources, check out the links below. For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com⁠ ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    Ghosts I Can Handle. Fluorescent Lights Are Another Story: When Lights, Sounds, Smells, and People Are Suddenly Too Much

  5. Sep 29

    Exhausted but Wired: Notes from the 2 A.M. Committee Meeting

    Do you ever crawl into bed completely exhausted… only for your brain to decide it’s the perfect time to replay every awkward conversation you’ve ever had, plan next week’s grocery list, solve three imaginary problems, and wonder if penguins have knees? Welcome to the 2 A.M. committee meeting. In this relatable and humor-filled episode, Blair explores the frustrating experience of being physically exhausted while your ADHD brain refuses to power down, especially during perimenopause. She shares her own journey from proudly identifying as a night owl to realizing that hormonal changes, nervous system overload, and the mental load of everyday life had completely changed her relationship with sleep. Rather than offering another list of miracle supplements or bedtime hacks, Blair takes a deeper look at why so many women struggle to “turn their brains off” at night. She explains how ADHD, fluctuating hormones, chronic stress, and carrying the invisible mental load all contribute to restless nights and racing thoughts, while gently reframing sleep struggles with compassion instead of self-criticism. This episode is a reminder that sleep isn’t simply about willpower or finding the perfect routine. Sometimes the biggest shift comes from giving your nervous system permission to slow down, treating rest as maintenance instead of something you have to earn, and letting go of the belief that waking up in the middle of the night means you’ve somehow failed. If you’ve ever found yourself wide awake at 2 a.m. mentally reorganizing your closet, replaying conversations from middle school, or making tomorrow’s to-do list instead of sleeping, you’ll leave this episode feeling understood, validated, and hopefully a little less alone. If this episode resonated with you, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another woman who could use the reminder that she’s not the only one attending the 2 A.M. committee meeting. To learn more about The Emotionally Organized Woman, join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community, and explore additional resources, check out the links below. For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com⁠ ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    Exhausted but Wired: Notes from the 2 A.M. Committee Meeting

  6. Sep 22

    Cold Closet, Lost Words, and the Brain Fog Files

    Ever walked into a room and immediately forgotten why? Blank on someone’s name mid-conversation? Called the refrigerator the “cold closet” because your brain temporarily misplaced the actual word? You’re in good company. In this episode, Blair dives into one of the most frustrating and anxiety-provoking experiences for women with ADHD navigating perimenopause: brain fog and memory glitches. From forgotten appointments and disappearing thoughts to losing words in the middle of a sentence, she explains why these moments are far more common than most women realize and why they don’t automatically mean something is seriously wrong. Blair breaks down how ADHD already affects working memory and how the hormonal changes of perimenopause can amplify those challenges by impacting focus, sleep, dopamine, serotonin, and overall cognitive function. Add the mental load of everyday life, and it’s no wonder your brain feels like it’s buffering. This episode is full of practical, compassionate strategies to help you stop treating brain fog like a personal failure and start working with your brain instead of against it. If this episode made you feel a little less alone, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another woman who’s ever stood in the kitchen wondering why she walked in there in the first place. To learn more about Blair’s coaching program, The Emotionally Organized Woman, and other resources for women navigating ADHD and perimenopause, check out the links below. For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com⁠ ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    Cold Closet, Lost Words, and the Brain Fog Files

  7. Sep 17 ·  Bonus

    Welcome to The Side Quest Club

    If you have ADHD, you already know life rarely feels like one neat main quest. It’s more like one main quest surrounded by seventeen side quests, three abandoned tabs, a hobby you picked up last Tuesday, and something important you forgot you were supposed to do today. That’s exactly why Blair created The Side Quest Club, a new monthly membership for women navigating ADHD, perimenopause, and all the chaos that happens when those two decide to team up. In this bonus episode, Blair shares the story behind the club, who it’s for, and why she wanted to create something smaller, more affordable, more flexible, and more community-based than a traditional course or coaching program. Each month, the Side Quest Club will focus on one specific topic and go deeper than a quick social media post or comment ever could. Members will get a prerecorded masterclass, practical resources, a live Q&A and connection session, and access to a private community where they can ask questions, share wins, compare notes, and bring all those “you are not going to believe what my ADHD brain just did” moments. The first Side Quest begins in October with working memory, including why thoughts disappear six seconds after you have them, why multi-step tasks can suddenly feel impossible, why you forget what you opened your phone for, and why perimenopause can make all of it feel even louder. Blair also explains the difference between the free ADHD and Perimenopause Support community and the Side Quest Club. The free group is staying exactly where it is. The Side Quest Club is simply for women who want to go deeper, have more direct access to Blair, and spend a full month understanding one piece of their ADHD-perimenopause experience instead of settling for the quick answer. And most importantly, this is not meant to become another thing you’re “behind” on. There is no perfect way to participate. Watch the training when you can. Come to the live session if it works. Use the resources that help. Ignore the ones that don’t. The goal is support, not homework. Membership is $20 per month and includes the monthly masterclass, supporting resources, live Q&A and connection session, and private community access. If you’ve been wishing there were a place between free social media education and a larger coaching program, the Side Quest Club was built for exactly that space. Check out the sign-up link below and join us for our first Side Quest in October. Assuming, of course, we all remember to show up.

    Welcome to The Side Quest Club

  8. Sep 15

    The Mask Is Getting Heavy: ADHD, Perimenopause, and the Exhaustion of Pretending You’re Fine

    What if the exhaustion you’re feeling isn’t just hormones or ADHD… but decades of trying to be who everyone else needed you to be? In this deeply personal episode, Blair shares her own journey of discovering ADHD in adulthood, navigating perimenopause, and realizing just how much energy had been spent masking, overcompensating, and performing “fine.” She explores why so many women with ADHD become experts at appearing capable while quietly carrying overwhelm, emotional intensity, perfectionism, and chronic exhaustion behind the scenes. Blair explains how perimenopause often becomes the tipping point, when the strategies that once kept everything together suddenly stop working, leaving many women wondering, “What happened to me?” Rather than seeing this as failure, she offers a different perspective: maybe your nervous system is finally asking you to stop carrying what was never meant to be carried forever. If you’ve ever looked like you had it all together while feeling completely overwhelmed inside, this conversation is for you. It’s an invitation to stop measuring yourself by how well you perform and start reconnecting with who you are underneath the mask. If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another woman who needs the reminder that she’s not the only one wondering why everything feels different lately. To learn more about Blair’s coaching program, The Emotionally Organized Woman, and other resources for women navigating ADHD and perimenopause, check out the links below. Resources & Links: For more information about working with Blair: ⁠www.blairpfeiffercoaching.com⁠ ⁠Join the ADHD and Perimenopause Support community.

    The Mask Is Getting Heavy: ADHD, Perimenopause, and the Exhaustion of Pretending You’re Fine
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About

Overstimulated and Over It is the podcast for women in perimenopause with ADHD who have been told they are too sensitive, too emotional, too intense and are finally realizing the world has just been too loud. Hosted by Blair Pfeiffer, ADHD and perimenopause coach, licensed mental health therapist, and certified sex therapist, this show explores the messy, beautiful intersection of hormones, neurodivergence, and the highly sensitive nervous system. Because you were never too much. You were just under-supported.

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