Anger Management: Practical Tools to Control Anger

Alastair Duhs | Anger Management Expert
  • 3.5 (37)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

Learning anger management is easy. Applying it in the moments that matter is the hard part. The Anger Management Podcast helps you turn anger management principles into real-world results. Hosted by anger expert Alastair Duhs, each episode delivers practical tools, proven strategies and straightforward guidance to help you control anger, stop losing your temper, and stay calm under pressure. You'll learn how to identify anger triggers, improve emotional regulation, communicate more effectively during conflict, understand the root causes of anger and develop healthier responses when emotions run high. Whether you're struggling with recurring frustration, explosive reactions, relationship conflict, parenting challenges, or the feeling that anger keeps coming back despite your best efforts, this show provides practical anger management strategies you can use immediately. If you're looking for an anger management podcast focused on real-life solutions rather than theory, you're in the right place. New episodes every week. Popular episode topics: Anger Management, How to Control Anger, Anger Triggers, Staying Calm Under Pressure, Emotional Regulation, Managing Frustration, the Anger Iceberg, Conflict Resolution, the Root Cause of Anger and Healthy Responses to Anger.

  1. 4d ago

    97 - "Don't Take It Personally" Is Useless Advice - Here's What Actually Works

    For help controlling your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever been told "Don't take it personally"? It's advice almost everyone has heard - but almost nobody explains how to do it. The truth is, taking things personally isn't a character flaw or a sign you're too sensitive. It's a pattern. And once you understand why it happens, you can stop reacting defensively, handle criticism more calmly, and build stronger, healthier relationships. In this episode, I explain why people take things personally and share two simple principles that can change the way you respond when someone criticises you, snaps at you or says something that hurts. You'll hear real stories from clients who learned to stop assuming every comment was a personal attack, communicate more effectively, and create calmer relationships at work and at home. We'll explore: Why most criticism says more about the other person than it does about you.How to tell the difference between a personal attack and feedback that's worth listening to.Why getting defensive keeps you stuck - and what to do instead.Practical ways to build emotional control, reduce anger, and respond with confidence under pressure. If you often replay conversations in your head, feel hurt by criticism, or struggle not to take things personally, this episode will give you practical tools you can start using today. The Anger Management Podcast helps men and women gain control of destructive anger, improve emotional regulation, strengthen relationships, and build calmer, happier lives. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System.

  2. Aug 30

    96 - His Daughter Sat Him Down at Christmas. Eighteen Months Later, Everything Had Changed.

    For help controlling your anger, visit angersecrets.com. One Christmas, Michael's daughter finally told him what decades of uncontrolled anger had done to their family. Eighteen months later, his life (and his relationships) look very different. For years, Michael believed everyone else was the problem. He could control his temper at work, but at home his wife and daughter experienced a very different side of him. After a painful Christmas conversation and weeks of follow-up emails from his daughter, he reached a point where he knew something had to change. In this episode, Michael shares how he learned to take responsibility for his anger instead of blaming other people, why controlling anger turned out to be easier than he expected, and how lasting change comes from understanding the real causes of anger rather than simply trying to suppress it. We also talk about rebuilding trust after anger, repairing relationships that have been damaged over many years, and why personal change has to be driven by your own values—not by waiting for someone else to forgive or acknowledge you. If you've ever wondered whether it's too late to change, whether your marriage can recover after years of anger, or whether your family can learn to trust you again, Michael's story offers hope, honesty, and practical insight. The Anger Management Podcast helps men gain control of destructive anger before it damages their marriage, family, and future. Each episode explores anger management, anger control, emotional regulation, healthier relationships, and practical strategies that create calmer, happier, and more connected lives. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System.

  3. Aug 23

    95 - 10 Rules to Control Your Anger for Good

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Most people think anger management is about calming down after they've already lost control. But if that's all you're focusing on, you're missing the bigger picture. Lasting anger control isn't built on a single technique. It's built on a set of principles that change how you think about anger, responsibility, communication and self-control. In this episode, I share the 10 rules I've taught clients for more than 30 years to help them gain lasting control over their anger. You'll learn why awareness is the foundation of anger management, how your thoughts create your emotional reactions, why anger and aggressive behavior are not the same thing, and how taking responsibility for your actions builds stronger relationships. I also explain the tension scale, the importance of listening skills, and why seeking to understand is often more powerful than trying to win an argument. Whether you've struggled with anger for years or simply want better tools for handling frustration, these 10 rules provide a practical framework you can start applying immediately. The Anger Management Podcast helps people gain control over destructive anger, stop losing their temper, and create calmer, healthier relationships. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System and founder of Anger Secrets. Resources & Next Steps: Book a free 30-minute phone call Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle" Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

  4. Aug 16

    94 - Why Couples Drift Apart (And the 6 Hours a Week That Can Change Everything)

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you started feeling more like housemates than partners? Most relationships don't fall apart because of one big event. They drift apart slowly through dozens of small moments of disconnection. The good news is that the same process can work in reverse. In this episode, I share Dr. John Gottman's research-backed "Magic Six Hours" framework and the seven simple habits that help couples rebuild connection, intimacy and trust. You'll learn why small daily interactions matter more than grand romantic gestures, how to create meaningful moments of connection throughout the week and the habits that help couples stay emotionally close even during busy seasons of life. We explore practical strategies including better daily check-ins, expressing appreciation, physical affection, quality time, stress-reducing conversations and weekly relationship reviews that prevent small problems from becoming major sources of resentment. If you feel like you and your partner have gradually grown apart, this episode will show you how small, consistent actions can help you reconnect and strengthen your relationship. The Anger Management Podcast helps people gain control over destructive anger, stop losing their temper, and create calmer, healthier relationships. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System and founder of Anger Secrets. Resources & Next Steps: Book a free 30-minute phone call Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle" Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

  5. Aug 9

    93 - The Real Reason You Keep Having the Same Argument Again and Again

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Why do the same arguments keep happening over and over again? Whether it's your partner, your children, a colleague or even a stranger in traffic, recurring anger isn't random. The same situations keep triggering you because of the way you're interpreting them. And until that changes, the pattern usually continues. In this episode, I share three powerful mindset shifts that can help you break the cycle. You'll learn how practicing acceptance reduces frustration, why empathy softens anger and improves relationships, and how maintaining perspective helps you stop turning small issues into major conflicts. Through real-world examples and practical strategies, you'll discover how to respond differently to the situations that repeatedly push your buttons. These aren't quick fixes, but they are proven skills that can dramatically reduce anger and help you create calmer, healthier relationships. If you're tired of having the same argument again and again, this episode will help you understand what's really driving the pattern - and what to do about it. The Anger Management Podcast helps people gain control over destructive anger, stop losing their temper, and create calmer, healthier relationships. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System and founder of Anger Secrets. Resources & Next Steps: Book a free 30-minute phone call Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle" Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

  6. Aug 2

    92 - What to Say When Your Partner Is Upset (And Why Nothing You Say Seems to Help)

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Your partner is upset. You want to help. But somehow, everything you say seems to make things worse. The problem usually isn't that you don't care. It's that most people were never taught what their partner actually needs in those moments. Before advice, reassurance or solutions can help, your partner needs to feel understood. In this episode, I share four simple communication skills that can transform difficult conversations. You'll learn how to use minimal encouragers to show you're listening, ask questions that deepen connection, reflect back what you've heard so your partner feels understood, and use positive feedback to create emotional safety. These skills may sound simple, but they can dramatically improve communication, reduce conflict, and help your partner feel supported instead of dismissed. They're also some of the most effective tools I teach couples who want to strengthen their relationship and feel closer to each other. If you've ever wondered what to say when your partner is upset, this episode will give you a practical step-by-step approach you can start using today. The Anger Management Podcast helps people gain control over destructive anger, stop losing their temper, and create calmer, healthier relationships. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System and founder of Anger Secrets. Resources & Next Steps: Book a free 30-minute phone call Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle" Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

  7. Jul 26

    91 - How to Control Anger: The Real Reason You Keep Losing Control

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. If you've ever promised yourself that this time would be different - only to find yourself losing your temper again a few weeks later- you're not alone. The problem usually isn't a lack of commitment. It's that most people have never been taught the skills that actually help them control anger. In this episode, I explain why trying harder isn't enough and reveal the three essential skills that create lasting change. You'll learn how to recognise your early warning signs before anger takes over, how positive self-talk and time-outs can stop escalation in the moment, and why changing the way you think about difficult situations is often the key to long-term anger control. I also explain how better communication and active listening help repair relationships and prevent recurring conflict. If you've struggled with anger for years and started wondering whether real change is possible, this episode will show you why it is—and how to get started. The Anger Management Podcast helps people gain control over destructive anger, stop losing their temper, and create calmer, healthier relationships. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System and founder of Anger Secrets. Resources & Next Steps: Book a free 30-minute phone call Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle" Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

  8. Jul 19

    90 - You've Grown Apart: Here’s How to Close the Distance

    For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. You've grown apart, but that doesn't mean your relationship is over. Many couples still love each other deeply, yet find themselves feeling disconnected, stuck in the same arguments or simply coexisting rather than truly connecting. The good news is that emotional distance in relationships can be reversed when you focus on the right things. In this episode, I explain the hidden reason many couples drift apart: unmanaged anger. You'll learn how anger creates defensiveness, fear and emotional walls that make genuine intimacy difficult. I also share two additional strategies that can dramatically improve your relationship: learning to truly listen and using Dr. John Gottman's "Magic Six Hours" approach to rebuild connection. You'll discover why communication problems are often listening problems, how active listening can quickly change relationship dynamics, and the simple weekly habits that help couples feel close, connected, and understood again. If you feel like you and your partner have grown apart, this episode will give you practical steps to start closing the distance today. The Anger Management Podcast helps people gain control over destructive anger, stop losing their temper and create calmer, healthier relationships. Hosted by Alastair Duhs, creator of The Complete Anger Management System and founder of Anger Secrets. Resources & Next Steps: Book a free 30-minute phone call Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle" Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

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About

Learning anger management is easy. Applying it in the moments that matter is the hard part. The Anger Management Podcast helps you turn anger management principles into real-world results. Hosted by anger expert Alastair Duhs, each episode delivers practical tools, proven strategies and straightforward guidance to help you control anger, stop losing your temper, and stay calm under pressure. You'll learn how to identify anger triggers, improve emotional regulation, communicate more effectively during conflict, understand the root causes of anger and develop healthier responses when emotions run high. Whether you're struggling with recurring frustration, explosive reactions, relationship conflict, parenting challenges, or the feeling that anger keeps coming back despite your best efforts, this show provides practical anger management strategies you can use immediately. If you're looking for an anger management podcast focused on real-life solutions rather than theory, you're in the right place. New episodes every week. Popular episode topics: Anger Management, How to Control Anger, Anger Triggers, Staying Calm Under Pressure, Emotional Regulation, Managing Frustration, the Anger Iceberg, Conflict Resolution, the Root Cause of Anger and Healthy Responses to Anger.

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