Love Your Life: Love Your Life: Midlife Reinvention, Emotional Regulation, & Parenting

Susie Pettit
  • 4.9 (205)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

If you've spent years taking care of everyone else and you're ready to reconnect with yourself, this show is for you. I'm Susie Pettit, certified parent coach, life coach, and mom of five. Every week, I share practical tools and compassionate coaching to help you navigate parenting, set healthier boundaries, stop feeling responsible for everyone else's happiness, and reconnect with yourself in midlife. We'll talk about emotional regulation, confidence, relationships, people-pleasing, empty nest transitions, and creating a life you genuinely love. I've lived through divorce, bankruptcy, heart surgery, and family estrangement, and know that even in life's hardest seasons, small shifts can create meaningful change. You don't need to overhaul your life. You just need the right support and one small step at a time. Welcome, Warriors. Let's build a life you love. This is a great podcast for empty nesters, adult children of emotionally immature parents, women with ADHD, CPTSD, or who are trying to figure out "should I stay, or should I go" in a marriage. Learn more about my work at SMBwell.com or on Instagram @‌smb.wellness. Thank you for listening—I'm cheering you on every step of the way!

  1. 3d ago

    Stop Feeling Guilty for Your Boundaries

    Want to feel less guilty? Especially around your kids, friends, siblings, or spouse? If you feel guilty saying no, worry about disappointing people, or find yourself overexplaining your decisions, this episode is for you. I'm talking about why boundary guilt is so common, especially for women who were raised to put everyone else first. I'll teach you exactly how to stop interpreting someone else's discomfort as proof that your boundary is wrong and start trusting yourself instead. I'm also breaking down the important difference between setting boundaries with healthy adults and setting boundaries with your kids, including teens, preteens, and young adults.   In this episode, I'll help you:  ✨ Understand why setting boundaries can trigger guilt ✨ Stop confusing someone else's discomfort with doing something wrong ✨ Set healthy boundaries without overexplaining or overdefending ✨ Handle pushback from your spouse, family, or friends ✨ Help make it safe for your kids to push back on some boundaries ✨ Step into your confident adult self and say less   You don't have to wait until setting a boundary feels comfortable. Listen in and let's make boundaries feel a whole lot easier.   🎧 Links Susie mentioned in this episode: https://smbwell.com/narc https://smbwell.com/mom https://smbwell.com/parenting ⭐️ Plus… if your kids don't push back against your boundaries or you are confused about any other aspect of your life or what to do…Let's chat! Book your free call with me today: https://smbwell.com/call 📩 Get the weekly email you'll actually read: Weekly WELLNESS and MIDLIFE SUPPORT every Wednesday SMBwell.com/newsletter 👩🏼‍🎓 Take it to the next level: See if the Love Your Life School is open for enrollment! http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/ 📸 Marinate your brain in positivity and helpful programming: Come follow me on Instagram @smb.wellness or Facebook https://www.facebook.com/SMBwell  🩷 Support Susie's mission of helping as many women and girls live lives they love: Become a Patreon here: https://SMBwell.com/patreon 🤓 FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap 🌟 Get the full show notes here 👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/424 📺 Find and follow her on YouTube - LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube  https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLW9PibXJfNpKk5Yr6rpNVq4P_utWFkvYS

  2. Sep 9

    Why You Keep Procrastinating (and What to Do Instead)

    Have you ever told yourself, "I'll do it tomorrow," only to find yourself saying the same thing the next day? And the next?And the next?  All the while, feeling worse and worse about yourself? (been there, done that 🫣) This episode is going to help so much. Click play to learn how you're NOT lazy, unmotivated, or any other garbage your inner mean girl is telling you. I have the amazing Monica Packer on the Love Your Life Show this week. She's the host of the About Progress podcast and author of the new book STICKY HABITS (get it here:  Sticky Habits https://amzn.to/4yAG3EH). She and I talk about the surprising reason so many of us procrastinate and why it often has nothing to do with discipline. We dive into the hidden ways perfectionism showed up in our lives, why success doesn't always feel the way we imagined it would, and how to stop waiting until everything feels "just right" before taking action. We talk about a lot, including: - Why procrastination is often a symptom, not the real problem. - The hidden ways perfectionism may be showing up in your life (even when you swear you're not a perfectionist). - The lie of what social media tells us success is.  - How to stop tying your worth to how well you mother, your bank account, or any other achievement. - A healthier way to build habits that support, rather than shame, you. (This was especially awesome!) - And how "good enough" action can lead to a life you love! Whether you've been putting off a goal, waiting for the perfect time, or simply feeling stuck, this conversation will leave you feeling supported, feeling less broken, more confident, and with some ideas on how to move forward. I'm so glad you're here.   If you liked this show, you'll like this one: 161: How to Change Your Life without Changing Your Life on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/161-how-to-change-your-life-without-changing-your-life/id1434429161?i=1000770657842 161: How to Change Your Life without Changing Your Life on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/7LjTFPnJYvDjun1trMMXjJ?si=cg78LM1DQdCGEyQ1gwK5xA Get all the links we mentioned, HER BOOK, and connect with Monica here 👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/423 Next Steps:  📩 Subscribe to the weekly newsletter so you never miss an episode. http://bit.ly/2gYQMlA 💬 Share this with a friend who complains that she doesn't finish things or who gets frustrated with how often she "falls off the wagon". 👩🏼‍🎓Work on busting perfectionism in community! See if the Love Your Life School is open for enrollment. http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/ 📸 Tag me and Monica on Instagram @smb.wellness to let us know you listened. Share which small thing you'll start this week. ⚡️

  3. Sep 2

    Emotional Regulation: Regulate Yourself Before You Regulate Them

    What if the first person you need to regulate isn't your child, your partner, or anyone else around you?  What if it's you? In this episode of The Love Your Life Show, we're talking about a skill that can completely change the way you handle conflict, big feelings, and other people's problems: regulating yourself before you try to regulate someone else. If you're anything like me, when someone around me is upset, frustrated, angry, or uncomfortable, I feel the urge to jump in. To give advice! To fix it! To explain why they should think about it differently! All in an effort to try to make "the problem" go away. But here's what I've learned as an emotional intelligence coach and mom.  What if we're the problem?! 😳 Because here's the thing: us getting involved is not helpful for them.  It's short-term helpful for us (as we feel a bit less uncomfortable), but it's a short-term fix for a long-term problem. What if, instead of trying to get them to change so we feel more emotionally regulated, we learn to regulate ourselves? What if we "let them" have the experience they're having, "letting them" learn how to manage their problems and their emotions while we let us learn how to manage ourselves?!? 🙄 Crazy idea, I know, but it is the path to emotional maturity, you feeling more calm in your days, and you raising the next generation of humans who can self-regulate! Listen in as I share what this can look like with kids, partners, family members, and other adults. People are going to be upset.  They're going to be frustrated.  They're going to disagree. And that's okay. They have lives to live and part of a big life is having uncomfortable emotions and learning how to manage them. Listen in to learn how you don't have to prevent every uncomfortable feeling. You don't have to solve every problem. And you don't have to manage everyone else's emotions. In fact, the most helpful thing you can do, no matter the age of the human, is to regulate yourself first. Calm is contagious. ✨ 💫 ✨ And if you want to get better at emotional regulation, this is exactly the kind of skill we're practicing together inside the Love Your Life School. If enrollment is still open when you're listening, come join us.   🎧 If you liked this episode, you'll like this one: the one on validation (where I share LOVE picture and acronym)  395: Emotional Validation: How to Support Without Fixing in Parenting and Relationships on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/395-emotional-validation-how-to-support-without-fixing/id1434429161?i=1000770657379 395: Emotional Validation: How to Support Without Fixing in Parenting and Relationships on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/7jjouBRDLpiYChDEwDOYtU?si=ttTHL0uGR_yuM6HZS7d59g ⭐️ NEW ⭐️ Feeling confused or overwhelmed with where to begin? Let's chat! Book your free call with me today: https://smbwell.com/call 📩 Get the weekly email you'll actually read: Weekly WELLNESS and MIDLIFE SUPPORT every Wednesday SMBwell.com/newsletter 👩🏼‍🎓Take it to the next level: See if the Love Your Life School is open for enrollment! 📸 Marinate your brain in positivity and helpful programming: Come follow me on Instagram @smb.wellness or Facebook  🩷Support Susie's mission of helping as many women and girls live lives they love: Become a Patreon here: https://SMBwell.com/patreon 🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap 🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/422 📺Find and follow her on YouTube - LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLW9PibXJfNpKk5Yr6rpNVq4P_utWFkvYS

  4. Aug 26

    How to Stop Arguing with Emotionally Immature People + Narcissists

    Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking, Wait, what?!? How did that get turned around on me? 😵‍💫 Or found yourself replaying an argument, wishing you'd explained yourself just a little better? If you're dealing with an emotionally immature person or a narcissist, more explaining won't help. Listen in as I share 3 teachings that will help you so much! I know because I've been in these convos where my brain feels like it's a tangle of confusion. These 3 things will help you stop getting pulled into exhausting conversations and start protecting your peace. You'll learn why logic doesn't work with someone who's focused on winning, how overexplaining gives them more leverage, and why the longer you stay in the conversation, the more likely you are to leave feeling drained. I also help you if you sometimes think: "Wait, am I raising a narcissist?" or "Wait, am I the narcissist?" This is a good one to listen to and to share. We all interact with emotionally immature people and emotional vampires (those people who suck our energy!)   In this episode you'll learn: Why you can't "win" an argument with an emotionally immature person or narcissist. The hidden reason they keep changing the conversation. How overexplaining works against you. Simple phrases that help you end unproductive conversations. The signs you've been pulled into an endurance test instead of a healthy discussion. How to respond differently with teens that will teach them emotional maturity. (aka "how to not raise narcissists" 😆)   If you've ever left a conversation feeling confused, defensive, or emotionally exhausted, this episode will help you recognize what's happening and give you actual things to say that will help you feel more confident and less confused or reactive.   🎧 If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:    223: 4 Ways To Disarm a Narcissist on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/223-4-ways-to-disarm-a-narcissist/id1434429161?i=1000770657691   223: 4 Ways To Disarm a Narcissist on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/1bdNYCBfaW1Lq3K2vrZ6xe?si=ieepvba3Ssm3Oe5xw2PBaQ   👩🏼‍🎓Join the school! Learn how to keep your energy and feel confident in conversations and conflict in the Love Your Life School http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/ ⭐️ Feeling confused or overwhelmed with where to begin? Let's chat! Book your free call with me today: https://smbwell.com/call 📩 Get the weekly email you'll actually read: Weekly WELLNESS and MIDLIFE SUPPORT every Wednesday SMBwell.com/newsletter 🩷 SUPPORT SUSIE: LEAVE A GOOGLE REVIEW HERE https://bit.ly/4hlostR (thank youuuuuu!!! Email me support@smbwell.com if you're a small business owner so I can return the joy!) 🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap 📸 Marinate your brain in positivity and helpful programming: Come follow me on Instagram @smb.wellness or Facebook   https://www.facebook.com/SMBwell 🩷Support Susie's mission of helping as many women and girls live lives they love: Become a Patreon here: https://SMBwell.com/patreon 🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/421

  5. Aug 23 ·  Bonus

    How to Stop Letting Everyone Else Ruin Your Mood, FREE Workshop

    Do you ever notice that you can be having a perfectly fine day… and then someone else's mood changes everything? Your teenager is grumpy, and suddenly you're walking on eggshells. Your husband is frustrated, and you can't seem to relax. Someone is disappointed in you, and you spend the rest of the day wondering what you did wrong. You might not think of yourself as someone who gets angry or has a bad mood. You probably think of yourself as stressed, overwhelmed, worried, or exhausted. But what if part of the reason you feel so overwhelmed is that you're constantly responding to what everyone else is feeling? In this quick bonus episode, I'm talking about why other people's emotions can affect us so deeply, why we can know intellectually that their feelings are theirs and still get completely pulled into them, and what emotional regulation has to do with it. And if this sounds familiar, I'd love for you to join me for my FREE workshop, How to Stop Letting Everyone Else Ruin Your Mood. Sign up here: https://smbwell.com/event I'll teach you the 4 automatic responses that can take over when you're stressed or activated and show you how to start creating more space between what happens around you and how you respond. Because you can care deeply about the people you love without letting their emotions determine how you feel. You don't need to become less caring. You need to learn how to stay connected to yourself while other people are having their feelings.   FREE workshop, How to Stop Letting Everyone Else Ruin Your Mood. Sign up here: https://smbwell.com/event

  6. Aug 19

    Stop Overexplaining

    Do you ever find yourself talking, talking, talking…trying to explain your decision, your actions, your boundary? Hoping that if you talk enough, the other person will understand? Uh…me!!! And in this episode, I'll be talking about why so many of us women overexplain, how confidence is involved, how what happened in our childhood could be involved, how relationships with narcissists are involved, how it could be harming our relationships with our teens and young adults, and much more. Plus, I give you actual ways to stop. Ways that work! I had all those things going for me (the childhood trauma, narcissistic relationships, teens, confidence 🤯!) In this episode, we're talking about why so many women overexplain and how this habit often starts in childhood, when our feelings were questioned, dismissed, or misunderstood. If you learned that you had to justify your emotions to be accepted, it makes sense that you're still doing it today. The problem? Emotionally mature people don't need a long explanation to respect your choices. And emotionally immature or narcissistic people often use your explanations against you. I'll show you how overexplaining quietly drains your confidence, keeps you seeking validation, and makes it harder to communicate with calm authority. You'll learn why "because I want to" is often enough, how healthy relationships assume positive intent, and practical ways to answer with fewer words and more confidence. If you're ready to stop defending yourself and start trusting yourself, this episode is for you. In this episode, you'll learn: Why so many women feel the need to overexplain How childhood experiences can shape this communication habit The difference between emotionally mature and emotionally immature relationships Why overexplaining can fuel conflict with narcissistic people (and teens!) This episode will help you speak with more confidence, protect your peace, and remember that your feelings and choices don't need a lengthy defense. I got some ideas from Jefferson Fisher (expert trial lawyer) and added my own expertise. I really hope you'll listen in.    🎧 If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:  391: Three Gen X Blind Spots That Hurt Our Relationships and How to Heal Them on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/391-three-gen-x-blind-spots-that-hurt-our-relationships/id1434429161?i=1000770657456 391: Three Gen X Blind Spots That Hurt Our Relationships and How to Heal Them on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/2HK0olINBrKMTPwQRidXOO?si=WU8W50uXQsiBSC6deF89RA ⭐️ NEW ⭐️ Feeling confused or overwhelmed with where to begin? Let's chat! Book your free call with me today: https://smbwell.com/call 📩 Get the weekly email you'll actually read: Weekly WELLNESS and MIDLIFE SUPPORT every Wednesday at SMBwell.com/newsletter 👩🏼‍🎓Take it to the next level: See if the Love Your Life School is open for enrollment! http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/ 📸 Marinate your brain in positivity and helpful programming: Come follow me on Instagram @smb.wellness or Facebook https://www.facebook.com/SMBwell 🩷Support Susie's mission of helping as many women and girls live lives they love: Become a Patreon here: https://SMBwell.com/patreon 🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap 🌟Get the full show notes here 👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/420 📺Find and follow her on YouTube-LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLW9PibXJfNpKk5Yr6rpNVq4P_utWFkvYS

  7. Aug 12

    Stop People Pleasing + Pretending: The Freedom to be YOU!

    How often do you say "It's fine" when it really isn't?  Or agreeing to something you don't want to do just to keep the peace? So many of us have become experts at pretending.  Pretending we're okay.  Pretending we don't have needs.  Pretending someone else's behavior doesn't bother us.  While those habits may have helped us as kids (or in our emotionally immature relationships), they hold us back as adults and women trying to be in supportive, emotionally safe and mature relationships. Pretending and people pleasing leave us feeling disconnected from people in our lives (not to mention exhausted!) In this episode of The Love Your Life Show, I come to you with a mid-year invitation to stop pretending and start choosing you.   You'll learn: Why people pleasing and pretending aren't personality traits, they're protective patterns How the "good girl" conditioning keeps so many women stuck What one of the top regrets of the dying can teach us about living today Simple ways to stop self-abandoning without becoming "selfish" How small moments of honesty build confidence and self-trust (and are the very things we need in our adult relationships and that we want to model for our preteens and teens!) If you're ready to stop performing, stop apologizing for things that aren't yours, and start living more in alignment with who you truly are, this episode is for you. The world doesn't need another exhausted woman pretending she's okay. It needs the real you.   🎧 If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:  People Pleasing and Lying on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/213-people-pleasing-and-lying/id1434429161?i=1000770657772 People Pleasing and Lying on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/0G207R5QM1oBD4u07od0Oh?si=QSM1XmuNQvSiLDRt5GsrxA ⭐️ NEW HERE ⭐️ Grab the free podcast roadmap here: https://smbwell.com/roadmap Want more than a podcast to listen to? Let's chat! Book your free call with me today: https://smbwell.com/call 📩 Get the weekly email you'll actually read: Weekly WELLNESS and MIDLIFE SUPPORT every Wednesday: SMBwell.com/newsletter 👩🏼‍🎓Take it to the next level: See if the Love Your Life School is open for enrollment! 📸 Marinate your brain in positivity and helpful programming: Come follow me on Instagram @smb.wellness or Facebook 🩷Support Susie's mission of helping as many women and girls live lives they love: Become a patreon here: https://SMBwell.com/patreon 🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/419

  8. Aug 5

    Making Friends as an Adult: The Skills We Were Never Taught

    In this week's episode, I'm joined by friendship expert, ADHD coach, and author Caroline Maguire to talk about the friendship skills most of us were never taught. We explore how past relational wounds, people-pleasing, fear of rejection, and even being easily distracted can impact our ability to build and maintain meaningful friendships. Caroline shares practical tools to help us stop performing for connection and start creating relationships that feel more genuine, supportive, and fulfilling. This was a super fun conversation (we found out she's living next to the small town I grew up in - I literally haven't met anyone who knew of my town since I was 18!). Plus the things we dove into were great!  Listen in to hear: How past friendship experiences may still be shaping your relationships today Why some people struggle to maintain friendships even when they deeply care The hidden role of rejection sensitivity and overthinking How people-pleasing and masking can get in the way of authentic connection Practical ways to deepen friendships during busy seasons of life What belonging actually feels like and how to create more of it Friendship isn't something we're supposed to know how to do. Like any skill, it can be learned, practiced, and strengthened. I  loved this conversation with Caroline and can't wait for you to listen.   If you liked this show, you'll like this one: Episode 354 How To Make Friends on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/354-how-to-make-friends/id1434429161?i=1000770657518 Episode 354 How To Make Friends on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/72IyJPMsdVFRbYLb1eGgq3?si=FcCkdHwxSwiO4DQ9kL4x-Q Get all the links we mentioned and connect with Caroline; go here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/418   Want more support? 📩 Subscribe to the weekly newsletter http://bit.ly/2gYQMlA so you never miss an episode. 👩🏼‍🎓Come join other women just like you (and make friends!) See if the Love Your Life School is open here: Love Your Life School http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/ 📸 Tag me on Instagram @smb.wellness https://instagram.com/smb.wellness so I can cheer you on!

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About

If you've spent years taking care of everyone else and you're ready to reconnect with yourself, this show is for you. I'm Susie Pettit, certified parent coach, life coach, and mom of five. Every week, I share practical tools and compassionate coaching to help you navigate parenting, set healthier boundaries, stop feeling responsible for everyone else's happiness, and reconnect with yourself in midlife. We'll talk about emotional regulation, confidence, relationships, people-pleasing, empty nest transitions, and creating a life you genuinely love. I've lived through divorce, bankruptcy, heart surgery, and family estrangement, and know that even in life's hardest seasons, small shifts can create meaningful change. You don't need to overhaul your life. You just need the right support and one small step at a time. Welcome, Warriors. Let's build a life you love. This is a great podcast for empty nesters, adult children of emotionally immature parents, women with ADHD, CPTSD, or who are trying to figure out "should I stay, or should I go" in a marriage. Learn more about my work at SMBwell.com or on Instagram @‌smb.wellness. Thank you for listening—I'm cheering you on every step of the way!

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