Love Marriage Again with Dr. Chavonne Dr. Chavonne Perotte: Transformational coach, author, and speaker.

Underneath every argument is a core issue that hasn't been addressed. The sooner you are able to identify what that is, the sooner you can get to the heart of the matter and spend less time debating the details of a situation.In this podcast episode I share with you the 6 fundamental questions each of you is asking when you are in conflict. Your emotional needs are showing up as uncertainty in answering these questions. As a result, you push, pull, and try to control the situation to get your needs met and these core questions answered.Understanding these 6 questions will help you to stop repeating the same patterns that keep you stuck, and help you to move forward.Tune in now to uncover which one is driving your conflict so you can get the resolution you are truly looking for.Also mentioned in this episode are several ways you can work with me to improve your communication and address the issues that keep you in conflict and disconnected as a couple. Visit DrChavonne.com (DrChavonne.com) to learn more about my private coaching options and my group program, The Marriage UpGrade.

Every person within a marriage has things about their spouse that bother them. It's to be expected.The challenge is managing how you handle the common frustrations, annoyances, and aggravating things that come up for you.Most conflict arises when you are not able to pause and reflect BEFORE reacting. In this episode, I share with you 6 possible reasons you are bothered by certain things about your spouse.Understanding these deeper issues will help you to be more empowered as you navigate trigger moments.You'll be able to self-reflect before lashing out and creating a communication or connection breakdown.You'll walk away from this episode understanding so much more about yourself, and what's actually happening when you feel bothered.With this new insight, and your intentional effort to address what's happening for you FIRST, you'll be able to more calmly discuss any challenges in ways you partner can hear you and respond to more positively. And if you would like to learn more about working with me directly, visit DrChavonne.com (DrChavonne.com) to learn more about my coaching programs.

A common issue I talk with people about is what to do when it seems like you are growing at a faster rate than your spouse.You are more self aware, working through your triggers, showing up as a better partner.Yet, it seems like your spouse is stuck with the same issues, reactions and mentality that made your marriage hard in the first place.It can be confusing for what you should do.Do you just need to be more patient? Will they ever come around? How can you find happiness with someone who's not moving in the same direction you are?I address these common questions inside this podcast episode.This is a conversation where we normalize different rates of growth and transformation because that's what happens in marriage.You grow, evolve and change at different paces. Tune in to find out why this happens, and more importantly, what you can do to keep yourself well and on track with your personal growth.I'll break down 5 specific steps to take, and also leave you with a pep talk to encourage you to keep going with your inner work so that you have more peace and fulfillment as your spouse walks their own journey.Mentioned in this episode: I have openings for private coaching, or my group program, The Marriage UpGrade. If you are ready to improve the quality of your marriage, or learn how to be less affected by your spouse, I'd love to support you.Visit DrChavonne.com (DrChavonne.com)to take the next step and book a complimentary consultation call with me.

There will be times in your marriage and life where it feels like you don't know what to do. The choices and next steps feel overwhelming. You have resistance or confusion about how to get unstuck.Don't believe the lie.Confusion, and :"not knowing what to do" is just your brain''s way of protecting you and keeping you in the same place.In my years of coaching so many clients, I find that most times, we are not confused and in fact know what to do. Yet there are obstacles and limiting beliefs that make if difficult to see a path forward. In this episode, I break down exactly what those obstacles are, where they come from, and what they are trying to do.I also share a specific process for moving yourself from a place of not knowing to a place of greater clarity and certainty in your next action or decision.This is a great episode to help you move forward in your marriage or in any other area in life.Also mentioned in this episode: My 6-month coaching program, The Marriage UpGrade, is re-opening for enrollment. If you still want to join the Fall 2023 Cohort, now is the time to get in. The doors are open this week only, and close on September 1st. To learn more, visit: https://marriageupgrade.drchavonne.com/ (https://marriageupgrade.drchavonne.com/)

One of the quickest improvements my clients experience is being able to recover more quickly from an argument. They are able to reflect on what happened and reach out to each other in a loving way to make amends.Recovering from arguments quickly gives you more time to enjoy with each other, and less time spent not talking, feeling frustrated and resentful.If this is something you struggle with, this podcast episode will take you through a series of questions that help you to recover more quickly from an argument. By answering the questions presented, here's what you'll get:-a deeper understanding of why sometimes you might not be ready to move on from an argument, and how to know what you need to feel better- an honest look at the role you might have played in an argument, and how acknowledging your part can empower you to avoid the same pitfalls the next time-clarity around what was disappointing in your interaction and why it bothered you so much so you can get your needs met-a vulnerable way to express how you're feeling so you can create a heart-to-heart connection with your spouse-motivation to communicate from a place of love for yourself and your partner so you can recover in self-honoring ways instead of people-pleasing just to move on.This is an episode you can return back to time and time again after any difficult conversations.Also mentioned in this episode is the opportunity to work with me directly. You can learn more about my private and group coaching programs here: drchavonne.com (drchavonne.com)

Do you ever find yourself experiencing resistance when it comes to taking positive steps to improve your marriage? You resist pausing before saying a hurtful comment to your spouse.You resist reaching out to your spouse when you're feelings are hurt.You resist expressing your love when it feels unreciprocated.You resist taking a long look at yourself and how you are contributing to your issues.You resist letting go of resentment and continue to hold a grudge.These are normal experiences that many people go through.There are a number of reasons you may be experiencing resistance right now.In this podcast episode I break down the 7 most common reasons I see among my clients and give you some specific next steps to take to move yourself forward.Tune in and learn:-what resistance in marriage looks like and how to know if this is where you are-the specific emotions you may be feeling that lead you to not take action-how you see your partner as a cause of your resistance-how past failure can often create resistance to trying again-how your view of yourself can help you overcome resistance-how to avoid shaming yourself if you can't find motivation right awayStaying stuck in a state of resistance will only keep you from experiencing the kind of marriage you truly want.Understanding your resistance and having specific steps to take will help you move forward in a more positive direction. Also mentioned in this episode: There are several ways you can work with me directly if you are looking for help in your marriage right now. Private coaching for couples, private coaching for individuals, and my group program, The Marriage UpGrade. Learn more about the programs I offer here: drchavonne.com (drchavonne.com)